(no subject)
I'm thinking a lot
and not doing nothing
so I'll just start talking this out
I need to get this out
I went today
I didn't go to last hour, I went instead
it was weird
she said I should probably take something
which I imagined she would
and I hate to do that
I hate to
really
I do
I've tried so hard to beat it
but I just keep shutting down
and I can't have that
I can't have that anymore
I can't afford all that time
because there's already been so many nights wasted because of it
I can't do that
so I guess I'll have to take it
but please
don't think less of me
I'm doing the only thing I haven't done
and she promised me I wasn't like her
she said that I wasn't
and she'd know
because she knows both of us
and I can't tell you what it means to hear that
even though sometimes I feel like it
sometimes I fear it more than anything else
I'm not like her
and that helps
so much
and this concert
I'm so worried
I just keep hearing about more and more people that are coming
and they're all the people that matter
Weber is going to be packed
and all for us
all for us
my last time
I can't do this
I can't think about this
no no
I can't
and I'm scared
I'm scared that you're trying to see me
or talk to me now
because you feel bad
because you're scared of how I might feel now
and that
no no
that cannot be
no it cannot be that way
I'd be so embarrassed
please
promise me
promise me you'll only be with me because you just want to
no other reason
promise me?
and the problem is
there's three of them
three
and you
you
I don't even know
I don't even know
I mean,
I'll wait
that's not even the problem,
I'll wait for as long as humanly possible
I'll wait
but
I just need a sign
even the smallest of signs
I just need one
to know
that you want me to hang on
because I will
I will
anything
something
just tell me
tell me to hold on
it doesn't have to mean anything more
or anything less
just give me a sign
so I know to hold on
because I want to
I want to so bad
and not doing nothing
so I'll just start talking this out
I need to get this out
I went today
I didn't go to last hour, I went instead
it was weird
she said I should probably take something
which I imagined she would
and I hate to do that
I hate to
really
I do
I've tried so hard to beat it
but I just keep shutting down
and I can't have that
I can't have that anymore
I can't afford all that time
because there's already been so many nights wasted because of it
I can't do that
so I guess I'll have to take it
but please
don't think less of me
I'm doing the only thing I haven't done
and she promised me I wasn't like her
she said that I wasn't
and she'd know
because she knows both of us
and I can't tell you what it means to hear that
even though sometimes I feel like it
sometimes I fear it more than anything else
I'm not like her
and that helps
so much
and this concert
I'm so worried
I just keep hearing about more and more people that are coming
and they're all the people that matter
Weber is going to be packed
and all for us
all for us
my last time
I can't do this
I can't think about this
no no
I can't
and I'm scared
I'm scared that you're trying to see me
or talk to me now
because you feel bad
because you're scared of how I might feel now
and that
no no
that cannot be
no it cannot be that way
I'd be so embarrassed
please
promise me
promise me you'll only be with me because you just want to
no other reason
promise me?
and the problem is
there's three of them
three
and you
you
I don't even know
I don't even know
I mean,
I'll wait
that's not even the problem,
I'll wait for as long as humanly possible
I'll wait
but
I just need a sign
even the smallest of signs
I just need one
to know
that you want me to hang on
because I will
I will
anything
something
just tell me
tell me to hold on
it doesn't have to mean anything more
or anything less
just give me a sign
so I know to hold on
because I want to
I want to so bad