The Sight We Wanted to See [1/4]
The Sight We Wanted to See (1/4)
A vague Anohana-based AU of Free!
Chapter One: Haruka and Nagisa
"I'll show you a sight you've never seen before"
With cherry blossoms blowing around him and the sun setting behind him, the scene was nothing short of magical in the eyes of a young Nanase Haruka. His eyes grew wide and he felt his heart beating faster as he watched the other boy grin at him. To his side, Makoto had the same surprised and amazed expression.
"So let's do our best ne, Haru?"
There was nothing else to say, nothing else to do but nod and agree. Matsuoka Rin had that power. He had such power to change people with his words and his smiles. He pulled Haruka out of his shell and made him appreciate swimming with a team. He gave Makoto a new view, of a bright sky that made him swim much faster than before. He taught Nagisa lessons that changed not only his swimming form but also the way he fought for his dream.
Matsuoka Rin can change everything.
But in the end, he ruined their lives.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Nanase Haruka woke up at the wrong side of the bed. It has been a long time since he last dreamed of that time. He repressed all those memories for so many years. Why did they have to resurface now? Why dream of something he had decided to forget?
"Ne, Haru..." A hand gripped his arm. Someone was beside him on the bed. "Haru, are you awake now?"
His eyes widened and he jumped out of bed to get away from whoever was invading his home. Whole body tense, he glared at the person sitting on his bed. It was a red-haired guy with sharp-looking teeth. A boy with a grin so charming that you want to smile back.
Haruka knew that smile. He rubbed at his eyes before looking again. This guy is probably his age. Someone who resembled him a lot? But no... there was something about him that made Haruka think that his old friend had come back once again in his life. He sighed. How was he supposed to react to this? He glanced around, looking at the door and wondering if the 'stranger' went in through the door or the window. The mirror on the side caught his attention then. "None..." The mirror did not reflect the person on his bed.
"Haru, come on! Talk to me~!"
The only conclusion he could think of is that this grown-up Matsuoka Rin was an illusion conjured by his tired mind. Probably. After seeing a dream that vivid, it might have affected him so much that it conjured something like this. He should just ignore it, right? Nodding to himself, he walked to his door to take his morning bath. He'll just take a bath, eat his breakfast then go to school. Just like usual.
"Haru! Aaaah~ You're as stubborn as ever! Didn't you miss me at all?!" The illusion continued following after him. "Maybe you can't recognize me since I grew up? Then~ Let me introduce myself! I'm Matsuoka Rin. I may have a girly name but I'm definitely a boy!" He showed a peace sign and grinned like a child.
'It's him. It's definitely him.' Haruka could not help but sigh. It's also been a while since he heard that introduction.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
The teacher opened the door and walked in with a young familiar boy behind him. Haruka immediately frowned while Makoto's eyes widened in surprise. "We have a new student," the teacher explained then gave the floor to the transferee.
"I'm Matsuoka Rin! I used to study in Sano Elementary but because of certain things, I'll study here from now on. I may have a girly name but I'm definitely a boy!" He showed a peace side then grinned. His eyes sparkled as he looked around the classroom with that friendly smile of his.
That was the start of their rivalry and friendship.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"You know, I think I was sent here for a reason. I don't really remember anything... I mean, why do I look so grown-up, right? It's all so weird!" Despite looking like a teenager, he still sounded like a 12 year old boy to Haruka. Sitting on the side of the bathtub as Haruka soaked, Rin showed no sign of disappearing any time soon. He wasn't deterred despite the cold treatment his friend was giving him. "But I do remember one thing. I have a wish I want to be granted... Maybe it's some kind of burden or a favor I couldn't do yet. It's just something I need to do before I go to heaven."
Haruka refused to respond to that. He would never be swayed again. Never again. Matsuoka Rin already did enough damage. He should just go and pester someone else.
Rin rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "You're still the same as ever." He sighed. "Then!" With those bright eyes and the usual grin, he said, "If you help me, I'll be able to go to heaven and disappear from here. Isn't that something you want?" He chuckled. "Isn't it troublesome that I'm here?" He easily used Haruka's thoughts against him. A manipulative brat through and through, isn't he?
"Fine." Haruka ended up agreeing to the illusions' requests. "What's your request?"
"Ehe~ I'm not sure?" He grinned apologetically. "I really don't remember much of my wishes... But I'm sure it was a big deal. And hm~ maybe I'll remember if I walk around or something!"
Haruka glared at him. "How am I supposed to help you?"
Looking away, he shrugged. "How about we ask for the others' help? Mako-chan and Nagisa-chan, how are they?"
Not wanting to answer that, the dark haired boy shrugged and dipped his head in the bath. As if understanding that move, Rin stood up and left Haru on his own.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Haruka sighed for the nth time today as he walked side by side with Rin. When was the last time he felt this irritated? It's been a long time, for sure. Ever since that day five years ago... Ever since that accident, Haruka has been walking through life with a blank face and no feeling for anything. Rather than lonely, he was just so tired of feelings. He was tired of caring. He was tired of interacting with other people.
Before, when he was feeling this way, he would go swim and let the water calm him down. He let the water wash away everything. He let the water be his escape.
That wasn't the case now. Ever since Rin...
"Ne, Haru, why are we walking here?" Rin looked around with curious eyes. "We're going to the Iwatobi High School, right? Isn't it easier to go by the sea side?"
Haruka looked away, hands clenching into fists. "I just like this side better."
"Oh." Rin watched him with a curious expression but did not press further. Instead, he asked "How about Makoto? Where's he? You always go to school together before..."
It's not the same as before. Haruka glared at the ground. "Makoto moved to Tokyo. He's in a boarding school so he only goes home every weekend."
"Ah~ That's surprising. I always thought you'll be together forever." Rin kept quiet again after that, probably deep in thought.
"You thought wrong" Haruka muttered as he walked ahead.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru..."
His door opened suddenly and Makoto came running inside, tears streaming down his face. Haruka watched as Makoto fell on his knees in front of him and continued sobbing. "Makoto...?"
"Rin-chan... Rin, he... They saw his body by the seaside..."
"What?"
"Rin-chan drowned." Makoto was shaking from head to toe, his eyes wide and showing only fear. "Haru-chan, the sea... It happened again... It's happening again..." He clutched at Haruka's sleeve. "Haru-chan..."
Haruka did not know what to do but to hold Makoto's hand. Deep inside, he was in turmoil. Rin... You can't die! You're not- You're not supposed to die. I still haven't-
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru-chan?"
Haruka woke up from his stupor when a voice called out to him from behind. It was another familiar face, a grown up version of an old friend. "Nagisa?" He asked out loud, blinking in confusion.
"It's been a while!" Nagisa ran up the stairs and followed Haruka into the rooftop. It was lunch time on their first day of class, and apparently Nagisa was able to enter this school. "How are you?"
"I'm fine." Haruka answered flatly as he sat down on the side. He really did not understand what was it with this day. Surprises appeared one after the other. He just wanted to get through high school and be a normal person. What was wrong with that? Why did this suddenly happen? "First Rin, now Nagisa..." He muttered under his breath.
"Eh?! Rin-chan?" Nagisa seemed to have heard him. "Did you see Rin-chan too?"
"You... you saw Rin?" Haruka glanced at Rin who was staring at Nagisa in confusion at the side. Probably not sure what he meant, Rin sat up and waved both of his hands in front of Nagisa. The younger boy didn't even blink. "When did you see Rin?"
Nagisa tilted his head to the right and answered slowly "I saw him in a dream today." Narrowing his eyes, he stared Haruka in the eyes. "But... is it different for you?" His eyes were wide, searching for answers in Haruka's blank expression. "Is it?"
"I saw him in a dream too." Haruka answered easily. He wasn't lying, anyway.
Grinning, Nagisa hummed to himself. "Are you sure you didn't see Rin-chan's ghost~?"
With a sigh, Haruka deflected him with a stoic response of "Ghosts aren't real." Rin pouted at him before sticking his tongue out. "Even though I'm clearly here!" He complained out loud. Haruka felt a pain in his head. He hasn't been this stressed in years.
"Aww," Nagisa puffed up his cheeks, crossing his arms. "I thought for sure I would be able to interact with a real ghost!" He sighed, then to open a new topic, he asked "Ah! Haven't Mako-chan come back yet?"
Haruka shook his head. "He only visits every weekend. It's a boarding school, so..."
"That's such a shame! I want to see Mako-chan too! Hm~ Ah, Haru-chan, will you join the Swim Club with me?" He grinned widely.
Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head another time. His headache was getting worse. "I don't swim anymore."
"Eh?!" While Nagisa was nodding sadly and being understanding, Rin leaned closer to Haruka and exclaimed in front of him. "Why?!" He shook Haruka by the shoulders, not even caring about Nagisa being there. "Why won't you swim anymore?"
Nagisa's eyes widened. "Haru-chan?" He stared at the creases forming on Haruka's uniform. It was as if someone was gripping Haruka. Somehow, it was clear to Nagisa what was happening. He reads about horror stories a lot, about ghosts and the occult. "Rin-chan, calm down." He said out loud. Out of the blue, the tension left Haruka's shoulders. "Are you here, Rin-chan? Could you hold this if you're here?" He took a pen out from his pocket.
"Nagisa..." Haruka stared at him with wide eyes. "I told you-" He frowned as the pen hovered in midair. "Rin! Don't!"
"I knew it!" Nagisa looked so proud of himself. "Rin-chan! It's been a while!" He grinned at the direction of the pen. Haruka wondered how he could smile like that while faced with a ghost of a friend. Nagisa took out his notebook and placed it in front of the pen. "Could you try writing down words?"
The pen moved and the words [Yo!] were written down. Without stopping, there were new words that were written. [Nagisa, could you tell me what you know? Haru is being secretive.]
Smiling softly, Nagisa nodded. "I would, if it would help Rin-chan." He glanced at Haruka, and with clear eyes, he apologized. "I'm sorry, Haru-chan."
"Why do you have to talk about it?" Haruka asked, bitterness in his voice. It has been 5 years. For five years, they have all been struggling. Why bring it up now? Why did Rin have to arrive in their lives again?
"Ne, Haru-chan, do you know why ghosts stay in this world? It's because they have things they still have to fix, or wishes they want to be granted." Nagisa explained softly, eyes shining with wisdom that wasn't there five years ago. While Haruka wasn't looking, while they weren't in contact, Nagisa had grown up. "More than anything, I want to help Rin-chan. I want him to cross over and be reincarnated soon. Maybe then, I'll be able to see a new Rin-chan too!"
Haruka looked down, not really sure what to respond to that. He still did not know what to do. Wouldn't talking about it open Pandora's Box? It felt that way, somehow.
"So... Rin-chan, what do you want to ask?" Nagisa grinned, but his eyes had that small sadness in it. Despite everything, he was still affected by the thought of Rin being here after all. Rin was special to Nagisa; he still is. That's why he wants to help. For Rin's peace, Nagisa would do everything.
Before Rin could speak or write anything, Haruka stood up and clutched the side of his head. "Nagisa's there to help you. You could just leave me alone now." He said quietly. "I'll just go to the infirmary." He took his things and hurried away, scared of seeing their expressions. He was already tired of listening to them. He did not want to open his heart again. He did not want to get hurt again.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Nagisa did not stop him. And for good measure, he also whispered "Rin-chan, please stay? Haru-chan needs to rest."
[Nagisa, what happened to Makoto?] Seems like Rin did stay.
"A lot happened after the accident." Nagisa looked at the hovering notebook, wondering how Rin's expression would change with every word he would say. "I didn't know about it but I think you did... Mako-chan had this trauma with the water, right? That's why you said backstroke was good for him, wasn't it?"
[I saw his trauma act up once.] was Rin's response.
"Yes, that. Well... it got worse." Nagisa looked down, memories overwhelming him. He could still remember the way Makoto was shaking during the funeral. How he could not look at the sea anymore. How he cried at any mention of Rin or the sea. "Mako-chan couldn't handle living in Iwatobi anymore. We were too close to the sea. That's why he transferred to Tokyo and lived with his relatives. He can't swim anymore, just like Haru-chan."
Nagisa waited for the pen to moved, but it simply shook. It was as if Rin couldn't write anymore. "Rin-chan, are you crying?" He placed a hand near the pen, wondering if he could touch his friend. He felt a warm air surrounding the pen. "Rin-chan, please don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault."
He waited and waited, but there was no response.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
When Haruka came home, Rin was already waiting inside his house. He was crying. "You heard everything?"
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." He sobbed. "I'll just be a wander-"
"I'll help you." Haruka interrupted before Rin could say anything ridiculous. "So stop crying." He walked over to his side, placing a light hand on his head. "Nagisa told me to tell you to come to school tomorrow. He'll wait for you."
"But-" Rin frowned, wiping his tears with the back of his hand. "Aren't you angry at me? I made everyone sad, didn't I?"
Haruka shrugged. "You're not acting like yourself, Rin. Wouldn't you just go forward and fix it, if it were you?" He remembers that simple-minded Rin so much. With a wide smile and bright eyes, he would go forward without any regrets.
This made Rin smile. "Saying that with that blank expression is really unnerving, Haru." He raise one fist up then. "Yosh! I'll have my wish granted and be reincarnated, then I'll pay you all back with something awesome!"
Without saying anything, Haruka patted his head one time then walked inside. Rin nodded to himself, determination being refilled once again, before following suit.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru-chan, Haru-chan, did you hear that? Rin-chan said I could join the relay with you!"
Nagisa had always been someone Haruka couldn't say 'no' to. He was hardworking and positive and passionate, and everything Haruka was not. Somehow, there was always a part of Haruka that wanted to protect and take care of the younger boy. So when he said "join the relay with you", Haruka could do nothing but say yes.
"Ohoho~ We'll be the best team ever!" Rin was so, so proud of having his own team. Ambitious and proud, he had his head held up high as Nagisa continued chattering away about how awesome swimming together would be. "Oi, Nanase, be sure to practice with us tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah," he answered noncomittally.
"Haru-chan, let's do our best?" Nagisa smiled widely at him. "We'll win first prize for sure, ne Rin-chan?"
"Of course!"
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Next chapter: Makoto and Gou
listen to this, btw. And think about Rin in this AU.
A vague Anohana-based AU of Free!
Chapter One: Haruka and Nagisa
"I'll show you a sight you've never seen before"
With cherry blossoms blowing around him and the sun setting behind him, the scene was nothing short of magical in the eyes of a young Nanase Haruka. His eyes grew wide and he felt his heart beating faster as he watched the other boy grin at him. To his side, Makoto had the same surprised and amazed expression.
"So let's do our best ne, Haru?"
There was nothing else to say, nothing else to do but nod and agree. Matsuoka Rin had that power. He had such power to change people with his words and his smiles. He pulled Haruka out of his shell and made him appreciate swimming with a team. He gave Makoto a new view, of a bright sky that made him swim much faster than before. He taught Nagisa lessons that changed not only his swimming form but also the way he fought for his dream.
Matsuoka Rin can change everything.
But in the end, he ruined their lives.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Nanase Haruka woke up at the wrong side of the bed. It has been a long time since he last dreamed of that time. He repressed all those memories for so many years. Why did they have to resurface now? Why dream of something he had decided to forget?
"Ne, Haru..." A hand gripped his arm. Someone was beside him on the bed. "Haru, are you awake now?"
His eyes widened and he jumped out of bed to get away from whoever was invading his home. Whole body tense, he glared at the person sitting on his bed. It was a red-haired guy with sharp-looking teeth. A boy with a grin so charming that you want to smile back.
Haruka knew that smile. He rubbed at his eyes before looking again. This guy is probably his age. Someone who resembled him a lot? But no... there was something about him that made Haruka think that his old friend had come back once again in his life. He sighed. How was he supposed to react to this? He glanced around, looking at the door and wondering if the 'stranger' went in through the door or the window. The mirror on the side caught his attention then. "None..." The mirror did not reflect the person on his bed.
"Haru, come on! Talk to me~!"
The only conclusion he could think of is that this grown-up Matsuoka Rin was an illusion conjured by his tired mind. Probably. After seeing a dream that vivid, it might have affected him so much that it conjured something like this. He should just ignore it, right? Nodding to himself, he walked to his door to take his morning bath. He'll just take a bath, eat his breakfast then go to school. Just like usual.
"Haru! Aaaah~ You're as stubborn as ever! Didn't you miss me at all?!" The illusion continued following after him. "Maybe you can't recognize me since I grew up? Then~ Let me introduce myself! I'm Matsuoka Rin. I may have a girly name but I'm definitely a boy!" He showed a peace sign and grinned like a child.
'It's him. It's definitely him.' Haruka could not help but sigh. It's also been a while since he heard that introduction.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
The teacher opened the door and walked in with a young familiar boy behind him. Haruka immediately frowned while Makoto's eyes widened in surprise. "We have a new student," the teacher explained then gave the floor to the transferee.
"I'm Matsuoka Rin! I used to study in Sano Elementary but because of certain things, I'll study here from now on. I may have a girly name but I'm definitely a boy!" He showed a peace side then grinned. His eyes sparkled as he looked around the classroom with that friendly smile of his.
That was the start of their rivalry and friendship.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"You know, I think I was sent here for a reason. I don't really remember anything... I mean, why do I look so grown-up, right? It's all so weird!" Despite looking like a teenager, he still sounded like a 12 year old boy to Haruka. Sitting on the side of the bathtub as Haruka soaked, Rin showed no sign of disappearing any time soon. He wasn't deterred despite the cold treatment his friend was giving him. "But I do remember one thing. I have a wish I want to be granted... Maybe it's some kind of burden or a favor I couldn't do yet. It's just something I need to do before I go to heaven."
Haruka refused to respond to that. He would never be swayed again. Never again. Matsuoka Rin already did enough damage. He should just go and pester someone else.
Rin rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "You're still the same as ever." He sighed. "Then!" With those bright eyes and the usual grin, he said, "If you help me, I'll be able to go to heaven and disappear from here. Isn't that something you want?" He chuckled. "Isn't it troublesome that I'm here?" He easily used Haruka's thoughts against him. A manipulative brat through and through, isn't he?
"Fine." Haruka ended up agreeing to the illusions' requests. "What's your request?"
"Ehe~ I'm not sure?" He grinned apologetically. "I really don't remember much of my wishes... But I'm sure it was a big deal. And hm~ maybe I'll remember if I walk around or something!"
Haruka glared at him. "How am I supposed to help you?"
Looking away, he shrugged. "How about we ask for the others' help? Mako-chan and Nagisa-chan, how are they?"
Not wanting to answer that, the dark haired boy shrugged and dipped his head in the bath. As if understanding that move, Rin stood up and left Haru on his own.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Haruka sighed for the nth time today as he walked side by side with Rin. When was the last time he felt this irritated? It's been a long time, for sure. Ever since that day five years ago... Ever since that accident, Haruka has been walking through life with a blank face and no feeling for anything. Rather than lonely, he was just so tired of feelings. He was tired of caring. He was tired of interacting with other people.
Before, when he was feeling this way, he would go swim and let the water calm him down. He let the water wash away everything. He let the water be his escape.
That wasn't the case now. Ever since Rin...
"Ne, Haru, why are we walking here?" Rin looked around with curious eyes. "We're going to the Iwatobi High School, right? Isn't it easier to go by the sea side?"
Haruka looked away, hands clenching into fists. "I just like this side better."
"Oh." Rin watched him with a curious expression but did not press further. Instead, he asked "How about Makoto? Where's he? You always go to school together before..."
It's not the same as before. Haruka glared at the ground. "Makoto moved to Tokyo. He's in a boarding school so he only goes home every weekend."
"Ah~ That's surprising. I always thought you'll be together forever." Rin kept quiet again after that, probably deep in thought.
"You thought wrong" Haruka muttered as he walked ahead.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru..."
His door opened suddenly and Makoto came running inside, tears streaming down his face. Haruka watched as Makoto fell on his knees in front of him and continued sobbing. "Makoto...?"
"Rin-chan... Rin, he... They saw his body by the seaside..."
"What?"
"Rin-chan drowned." Makoto was shaking from head to toe, his eyes wide and showing only fear. "Haru-chan, the sea... It happened again... It's happening again..." He clutched at Haruka's sleeve. "Haru-chan..."
Haruka did not know what to do but to hold Makoto's hand. Deep inside, he was in turmoil. Rin... You can't die! You're not- You're not supposed to die. I still haven't-
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru-chan?"
Haruka woke up from his stupor when a voice called out to him from behind. It was another familiar face, a grown up version of an old friend. "Nagisa?" He asked out loud, blinking in confusion.
"It's been a while!" Nagisa ran up the stairs and followed Haruka into the rooftop. It was lunch time on their first day of class, and apparently Nagisa was able to enter this school. "How are you?"
"I'm fine." Haruka answered flatly as he sat down on the side. He really did not understand what was it with this day. Surprises appeared one after the other. He just wanted to get through high school and be a normal person. What was wrong with that? Why did this suddenly happen? "First Rin, now Nagisa..." He muttered under his breath.
"Eh?! Rin-chan?" Nagisa seemed to have heard him. "Did you see Rin-chan too?"
"You... you saw Rin?" Haruka glanced at Rin who was staring at Nagisa in confusion at the side. Probably not sure what he meant, Rin sat up and waved both of his hands in front of Nagisa. The younger boy didn't even blink. "When did you see Rin?"
Nagisa tilted his head to the right and answered slowly "I saw him in a dream today." Narrowing his eyes, he stared Haruka in the eyes. "But... is it different for you?" His eyes were wide, searching for answers in Haruka's blank expression. "Is it?"
"I saw him in a dream too." Haruka answered easily. He wasn't lying, anyway.
Grinning, Nagisa hummed to himself. "Are you sure you didn't see Rin-chan's ghost~?"
With a sigh, Haruka deflected him with a stoic response of "Ghosts aren't real." Rin pouted at him before sticking his tongue out. "Even though I'm clearly here!" He complained out loud. Haruka felt a pain in his head. He hasn't been this stressed in years.
"Aww," Nagisa puffed up his cheeks, crossing his arms. "I thought for sure I would be able to interact with a real ghost!" He sighed, then to open a new topic, he asked "Ah! Haven't Mako-chan come back yet?"
Haruka shook his head. "He only visits every weekend. It's a boarding school, so..."
"That's such a shame! I want to see Mako-chan too! Hm~ Ah, Haru-chan, will you join the Swim Club with me?" He grinned widely.
Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head another time. His headache was getting worse. "I don't swim anymore."
"Eh?!" While Nagisa was nodding sadly and being understanding, Rin leaned closer to Haruka and exclaimed in front of him. "Why?!" He shook Haruka by the shoulders, not even caring about Nagisa being there. "Why won't you swim anymore?"
Nagisa's eyes widened. "Haru-chan?" He stared at the creases forming on Haruka's uniform. It was as if someone was gripping Haruka. Somehow, it was clear to Nagisa what was happening. He reads about horror stories a lot, about ghosts and the occult. "Rin-chan, calm down." He said out loud. Out of the blue, the tension left Haruka's shoulders. "Are you here, Rin-chan? Could you hold this if you're here?" He took a pen out from his pocket.
"Nagisa..." Haruka stared at him with wide eyes. "I told you-" He frowned as the pen hovered in midair. "Rin! Don't!"
"I knew it!" Nagisa looked so proud of himself. "Rin-chan! It's been a while!" He grinned at the direction of the pen. Haruka wondered how he could smile like that while faced with a ghost of a friend. Nagisa took out his notebook and placed it in front of the pen. "Could you try writing down words?"
The pen moved and the words [Yo!] were written down. Without stopping, there were new words that were written. [Nagisa, could you tell me what you know? Haru is being secretive.]
Smiling softly, Nagisa nodded. "I would, if it would help Rin-chan." He glanced at Haruka, and with clear eyes, he apologized. "I'm sorry, Haru-chan."
"Why do you have to talk about it?" Haruka asked, bitterness in his voice. It has been 5 years. For five years, they have all been struggling. Why bring it up now? Why did Rin have to arrive in their lives again?
"Ne, Haru-chan, do you know why ghosts stay in this world? It's because they have things they still have to fix, or wishes they want to be granted." Nagisa explained softly, eyes shining with wisdom that wasn't there five years ago. While Haruka wasn't looking, while they weren't in contact, Nagisa had grown up. "More than anything, I want to help Rin-chan. I want him to cross over and be reincarnated soon. Maybe then, I'll be able to see a new Rin-chan too!"
Haruka looked down, not really sure what to respond to that. He still did not know what to do. Wouldn't talking about it open Pandora's Box? It felt that way, somehow.
"So... Rin-chan, what do you want to ask?" Nagisa grinned, but his eyes had that small sadness in it. Despite everything, he was still affected by the thought of Rin being here after all. Rin was special to Nagisa; he still is. That's why he wants to help. For Rin's peace, Nagisa would do everything.
Before Rin could speak or write anything, Haruka stood up and clutched the side of his head. "Nagisa's there to help you. You could just leave me alone now." He said quietly. "I'll just go to the infirmary." He took his things and hurried away, scared of seeing their expressions. He was already tired of listening to them. He did not want to open his heart again. He did not want to get hurt again.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Nagisa did not stop him. And for good measure, he also whispered "Rin-chan, please stay? Haru-chan needs to rest."
[Nagisa, what happened to Makoto?] Seems like Rin did stay.
"A lot happened after the accident." Nagisa looked at the hovering notebook, wondering how Rin's expression would change with every word he would say. "I didn't know about it but I think you did... Mako-chan had this trauma with the water, right? That's why you said backstroke was good for him, wasn't it?"
[I saw his trauma act up once.] was Rin's response.
"Yes, that. Well... it got worse." Nagisa looked down, memories overwhelming him. He could still remember the way Makoto was shaking during the funeral. How he could not look at the sea anymore. How he cried at any mention of Rin or the sea. "Mako-chan couldn't handle living in Iwatobi anymore. We were too close to the sea. That's why he transferred to Tokyo and lived with his relatives. He can't swim anymore, just like Haru-chan."
Nagisa waited for the pen to moved, but it simply shook. It was as if Rin couldn't write anymore. "Rin-chan, are you crying?" He placed a hand near the pen, wondering if he could touch his friend. He felt a warm air surrounding the pen. "Rin-chan, please don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault."
He waited and waited, but there was no response.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
When Haruka came home, Rin was already waiting inside his house. He was crying. "You heard everything?"
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." He sobbed. "I'll just be a wander-"
"I'll help you." Haruka interrupted before Rin could say anything ridiculous. "So stop crying." He walked over to his side, placing a light hand on his head. "Nagisa told me to tell you to come to school tomorrow. He'll wait for you."
"But-" Rin frowned, wiping his tears with the back of his hand. "Aren't you angry at me? I made everyone sad, didn't I?"
Haruka shrugged. "You're not acting like yourself, Rin. Wouldn't you just go forward and fix it, if it were you?" He remembers that simple-minded Rin so much. With a wide smile and bright eyes, he would go forward without any regrets.
This made Rin smile. "Saying that with that blank expression is really unnerving, Haru." He raise one fist up then. "Yosh! I'll have my wish granted and be reincarnated, then I'll pay you all back with something awesome!"
Without saying anything, Haruka patted his head one time then walked inside. Rin nodded to himself, determination being refilled once again, before following suit.
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
"Haru-chan, Haru-chan, did you hear that? Rin-chan said I could join the relay with you!"
Nagisa had always been someone Haruka couldn't say 'no' to. He was hardworking and positive and passionate, and everything Haruka was not. Somehow, there was always a part of Haruka that wanted to protect and take care of the younger boy. So when he said "join the relay with you", Haruka could do nothing but say yes.
"Ohoho~ We'll be the best team ever!" Rin was so, so proud of having his own team. Ambitious and proud, he had his head held up high as Nagisa continued chattering away about how awesome swimming together would be. "Oi, Nanase, be sure to practice with us tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah," he answered noncomittally.
"Haru-chan, let's do our best?" Nagisa smiled widely at him. "We'll win first prize for sure, ne Rin-chan?"
"Of course!"
.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.
Next chapter: Makoto and Gou
listen to this, btw. And think about Rin in this AU.
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