(no subject)
Title: Longing; 跡切れた Melody
Rating: PG13
Prompt: how to break up with Yuto in 5 easy steps, written to the best of my abilities. And with lots of angst.
Pairing: Yamajima. Chinen is here-and-there.
Notes: The LJcut is taken from X Japan's song, Without You, a composition dedicated to Hideto Matsumoto (hide), and it's.. well. beautiful. the title is another X Japan ballad, Longing. It's pretty, sad, and really, really awesome. it's my breakup fic song. XD
[01. Keep it simple.]
Yamada Ryosuke takes a deep breath, and says it.
I don't really love you anymore. No. That's not right. Remember when I said that I loved you? I lied.
That's not good, either.
Yamada puts his head down in his arms, and sighs- and when he looks up, tears glimmer in his reflection's eyes.
I...
[02. Keep it short.]
Let's break up. There.
Now, all he has to do is tell him so. Yamada tries to plan it out- he'll say it when they're practicing. No, he'll tell him when they walk home together. Their time.
No.
He'll give him a note- he'll text him, he'll say it during a call.
Yamada flips his phone open, and a picture of Yuto and himself blink back, cheerfully happy and bright.
Yuto deserves better.
[03. Leave no 'maybe's.]
Ryosuke has become abrupt and cold with him, and Yuto is frustrated. He calls, he texts, he emails and he chatters away- but to his dismay, Yama-chan has tuned him out.
And he tries not to seethe when he sees Chinen sitting on Yamada's lap, easily drawing that smile- my smile- and tickling him gently. Laughing.
What happened to us?
[04. Tell him in person.]
Yamada whispers it, in Yuto's arms. A perverse, twisted parody of themselves, and he tells himself that he wasn't crying- that Yuto wasn't crying, too.
He didn't expect this part. He doesn't know what to do, now. After the practice and the thinking and the sleepless nights.
You deserve better. Let's break up. Can we stay friends?
[05. Stay calm.]
Yamada wrenches himself out of Yuto's grasp, and turns away sharply. He doesn't look anywhere, his head hanging down, and pretends that he's just strolling in the streets. As if he didn't just tear his heart away, and leave it with Yuto.
Broken, on the sidewalks.
He doesn't cry until he gets home.