Personal Beliefs - Death and Religion
Due to the unfortunate prolonged poor health of an immediate family member, the deaths of family and close friends of the family in a short period of time, and being unable to look away while my Mother watched a retelling of Henry the VIII, I've had to confront a stark reality of my lack of religious faith: namely, that while I wish and hope for a peaceful afterlife or reincarnation, I don't actually *believe* in either.
Which scares me out of my mind. Because I enjoy the act and process of thinking, dreaming, creating, and reading. And I believe all that ends when you die. That nothing else occurs. If you're lucky, you get to die while dreaming in your sleep, but if not your last moments of conscious thought are 'I'm going to die and its going to hurt a *lot*'. And then there's the deaths that just come out of nowhere, something you weren't even expecting to happen.
I've viewed religion for the longest time as a giant scam or as a means of societal control. And considering the history I've read, I'm not wrong to think so - some religions and cults are scams, and every major religion has some sort of code or rules on how to live your life. I've viewed religious texts as legends, fables, and myths, and thus not to be trusted as fact.
I've hated the idea of institutionalized religions, simply because the vast majority are sexist and/or have had some clause of killing or ignoring others of different beliefs.
I want to believe in something good beyond death, but I also don't want to believe in it just because I'm scared not to, as that brings me back to the viewpoint of scams and societal control.
Which scares me out of my mind. Because I enjoy the act and process of thinking, dreaming, creating, and reading. And I believe all that ends when you die. That nothing else occurs. If you're lucky, you get to die while dreaming in your sleep, but if not your last moments of conscious thought are 'I'm going to die and its going to hurt a *lot*'. And then there's the deaths that just come out of nowhere, something you weren't even expecting to happen.
I've viewed religion for the longest time as a giant scam or as a means of societal control. And considering the history I've read, I'm not wrong to think so - some religions and cults are scams, and every major religion has some sort of code or rules on how to live your life. I've viewed religious texts as legends, fables, and myths, and thus not to be trusted as fact.
I've hated the idea of institutionalized religions, simply because the vast majority are sexist and/or have had some clause of killing or ignoring others of different beliefs.
I want to believe in something good beyond death, but I also don't want to believe in it just because I'm scared not to, as that brings me back to the viewpoint of scams and societal control.