Father

[yamihakkai]

Title: Father
Fandom: Young Avengers
Characters: Teddy, Billy, Eli, Kate and Cassie

Word Count: 652
Rating: G
Summary: They’re talking about fathers

-I… never met my father... he died… before I was born… cancer… and… you know… I felt alone…I just… couldn’t talk about my problems with my mother… I had so many questions… and… when my body began changing

Comments

[whaleabc]

Hehe, cool. I assume that it's kinda like they're speaking?

Sorry, but the ellipses made the passages a bit hard to read. Maybe put in some other punctuation (eg. "it's not about the shape-shifting thing, you know? Teenagers DO change.") And use dashes (-) to do cutoffs and sudden pauses. Now it kinda looks like they're all overly wistful.

Great initiative, though. The YA talking about how they feel towards their parents.

By the way, are they talking to each other? It doesn't look like they are...

[yamihakkai]

Ah... thanks for your comment... the punctuation I used makes complete sense in Portuguese (my mother language) but I'll try to fix it and make it easier for you all.

And They're not talkling to each other in a big group.. It's the collection of their ideas and opinions about their parents... Maybe they would talk to one or another partner... Like Teddy and Billy.. or Cassie and Kate... but I see it as their deepest thoughts...

I hope you enjoy the others.

[yamihakkai]

Well, it really happened MANY years ago... I remember I was a little boy coming home after school and them I picked one of my Older cousin's comics and the story was there! A single one-shot story about Ant-man in a lazy day... I couldn't help but lauhing at it....

It's too bad I can't find the comic aniwhere nowadays.... but it was a nice story...

Thank you again for your support on comenting on my fics!