same old boring crap I always talk about

[yasdnil723]

Today I cleaned my room and bathroom perfectly! It's noted that I didn't exactly choose to do it myself (mom was getting fed up) but I still feel good for getting it done. They were both trashed to the highest extent.

Also yesterday I did something social for once! Laurie will be so proud, lol. I got together for dinner with three of my high school

Comments

[madame_chuchita]

Agreed. Nine days without any addiction is well worth noting and being proud of :)

[yasdnil723]

You don't sound like an idiot at all, lol. 9 days is a pretty good accomplishment, and I would be happier about it except in my particular case I consider purging to be more of a side effect/contributor than my main problem.

I'm kind of relieved to hear you weren't commenting because you didn't to sound ignorant (not that you would, I'm sure!) because I was kind of afraid talking about it made everyone non eating disordered on my flist super uncomfortable/grossed out.

[kris_star_ve_95]

"but most adult americans are overweight according to bmi so really that's not saying anything) but that's how I feel. Walking around, just going about my business I feel large, morbidly obese, gargantuan, embarrassed to be looked at."

...I agree with this so much. The average weight is now much larger than in years past so by social referencing we are almost accustomed to seeing this.

Sometimes its hard to imagine people loving you for anything other than looks/size, but when you reverse it and ask yourself why you love your friends and family, their weight is never an issue.

best wishes!

[modrndaydorothy]

Good for you, going out!!! I know how anxiety-provoking that is...I went to the mall yesterday and was sweating bullets from all the sounds and sights and having to interact with people...dear god, lol.

I understand about not caring about being thin, but just not wanting to be fat. The only thing I have to say is that there's a very, very fine line that you can't even see when you're standing here and looking at things this way, but it's there. And if you think this way, even if you don't intend to, you'll be heading in the direction to cross it.

And :) with a knowing raise of the eyebrow to what you said about this all being perspective.

xxx

[yasdnil723]

Ugh yeah the mall is a hard one...at least the holidays are over though, because then it's like mall with 5x the people, lol. :P