Mirror
Title: Mirror
Author: yeah5501
Rating: R
Pairing: Jessica-centric, Jessica/Tiffany
I stare at the mirror and ask who am I?
As I look in the mirror, I realize, this isn't me. I am not a monster.
Sometimes, when I look at the mirror, I see bloodshot eyes; not the usual brown orbs she loves.
I look in the mirror, to see myself smirking, bloodstains on my cheeks and forehead.
This isn't me.
I am not a monster.
Or am I?
*
I hurt her. She will never forgive me.
I never intended to do it. I don't even know why I did it. I do not know how I did it. All I know is that I did it. I killed her dog. I hurt her because of
that.
I did not know what happened. All I can remember is her cry. Her scream. Her pleads. And blood.
Blood. Lots of blood. On my hands. On my shirt. Blood all over the place.
I stared into her eyes. It was pure hatred, anger and sadness.
I caused it, didn't I?
I hurt you.
I killed your precious dog.
I didn't mean to.
Or did I?
*
I stare at my reflection and ask, how many?
How many lives did I take?
Why am I doing such?
How did I?
Why can't I remember?
*
I remember walking along the beach.
It was sunset. A beautiful one.
I wish you were beside me, but you weren't.
You were busy. I understand.
I walk to think through what I did. What is it that I did?
Why can't I remember? Everything was a blurred picture.
But I do remember seeing you walking with a guy. You looked so happy with him.
I don't know what happened next.
All I know is that there was a body in front of me. Waves hitting the fallen body. He wasn't breathing.
And you were staring at me with fearful eyes. Those eyes, as if you saw a monster.
What happened?
Am I a monster?
*
I stare at the mirror, trying to remember everything. But nothing came up.
Nothing. Or so I thought.
There was a voice.
It was so dark and husky. So mysterious and scary.
It called unto me.
Sooyeon. Sooyeon. Do not fear my dear Sooyeon.
Who are you, I asked.
I am you.
NO! WHO ARE YOU?!
I AM YOU. I AM THE EVIL THAT RESIDES IN YOU, HIDDEN IN DEEPEST AND DARKEST PART OR YOU. I AM YOUR DARKEST DESIRES.
I AM YOU AND YOU ARE ME.
NO!
I AM THE ONLY ONE LEFT FOR YOU, MY DEAR.
NO! YOU'RE NOT! I HAVE MIYOUNG! I HAVE MY FRIENDS! MY FAMILY!
The voice started laughing maniacally.
What friends and family? Didn't you kill them all?
What?
NO! I DID NOT!
Yes you did, my Sooyeon.
NO! NO! NO!
Deny all you want, my dear but nothing will change. You are alone. I am the only one you have left. Your Miyoung hates you. She does not
want you.
YES SHE DOES! SHE LOVES ME!
And how can you say?
SHE TOLD ME! SHE SAID SHE LOVES ME WITH ALL HER HEART.
Oh really?
YOU'RE A MONSTER! I HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!
My eyes widened.
NO! THAT'S NOT TRUE!
FACE IT MY SOOYEON.
NO! I REFUSE!!!
BELIEVE IT SOOYEON. NO ONE WANTS YOU.
NOO!
BELIEVE MY SOOYEON. BELIEVE. The voice said as it fades away.
No. This can't be true. I did not do those. I did not take them away. No.
*
I stare at my reflection.
I realize who was staring back at me.
It was Sooyeon. Me. The monster.
I remember how I hurt them. How I took their lives away. How I lost control. How I let the monster in me take over.
This is not what I wanted.
This is not how I imagined my life to be.
No.
I am the monster.
I hurt people. I take the ones important to them. I take away lives of people.
I need to be punished. To be wiped out of this world. I do not deserve to live. Death is not the suitable punishment. There has to be something graver. But there’s no other option. It is death that awaits me. It is death that I deserve.
*
I stare at the mirror. Taking one last look at the monster I see.
I held up the gun, placed the muzzle in my mouth and took one last breath.
*BANG*
END
Author: yeah5501
Rating: R
Pairing: Jessica-centric, Jessica/Tiffany
I stare at the mirror and ask who am I?
As I look in the mirror, I realize, this isn't me. I am not a monster.
Sometimes, when I look at the mirror, I see bloodshot eyes; not the usual brown orbs she loves.
I look in the mirror, to see myself smirking, bloodstains on my cheeks and forehead.
This isn't me.
I am not a monster.
Or am I?
*
I hurt her. She will never forgive me.
I never intended to do it. I don't even know why I did it. I do not know how I did it. All I know is that I did it. I killed her dog. I hurt her because of
that.
I did not know what happened. All I can remember is her cry. Her scream. Her pleads. And blood.
Blood. Lots of blood. On my hands. On my shirt. Blood all over the place.
I stared into her eyes. It was pure hatred, anger and sadness.
I caused it, didn't I?
I hurt you.
I killed your precious dog.
I didn't mean to.
Or did I?
*
I stare at my reflection and ask, how many?
How many lives did I take?
Why am I doing such?
How did I?
Why can't I remember?
*
I remember walking along the beach.
It was sunset. A beautiful one.
I wish you were beside me, but you weren't.
You were busy. I understand.
I walk to think through what I did. What is it that I did?
Why can't I remember? Everything was a blurred picture.
But I do remember seeing you walking with a guy. You looked so happy with him.
I don't know what happened next.
All I know is that there was a body in front of me. Waves hitting the fallen body. He wasn't breathing.
And you were staring at me with fearful eyes. Those eyes, as if you saw a monster.
What happened?
Am I a monster?
*
I stare at the mirror, trying to remember everything. But nothing came up.
Nothing. Or so I thought.
There was a voice.
It was so dark and husky. So mysterious and scary.
It called unto me.
Sooyeon. Sooyeon. Do not fear my dear Sooyeon.
Who are you, I asked.
I am you.
NO! WHO ARE YOU?!
I AM YOU. I AM THE EVIL THAT RESIDES IN YOU, HIDDEN IN DEEPEST AND DARKEST PART OR YOU. I AM YOUR DARKEST DESIRES.
I AM YOU AND YOU ARE ME.
NO!
I AM THE ONLY ONE LEFT FOR YOU, MY DEAR.
NO! YOU'RE NOT! I HAVE MIYOUNG! I HAVE MY FRIENDS! MY FAMILY!
The voice started laughing maniacally.
What friends and family? Didn't you kill them all?
What?
NO! I DID NOT!
Yes you did, my Sooyeon.
NO! NO! NO!
Deny all you want, my dear but nothing will change. You are alone. I am the only one you have left. Your Miyoung hates you. She does not
want you.
YES SHE DOES! SHE LOVES ME!
And how can you say?
SHE TOLD ME! SHE SAID SHE LOVES ME WITH ALL HER HEART.
Oh really?
YOU'RE A MONSTER! I HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!
My eyes widened.
NO! THAT'S NOT TRUE!
FACE IT MY SOOYEON.
NO! I REFUSE!!!
BELIEVE IT SOOYEON. NO ONE WANTS YOU.
NOO!
BELIEVE MY SOOYEON. BELIEVE. The voice said as it fades away.
No. This can't be true. I did not do those. I did not take them away. No.
*
I stare at my reflection.
I realize who was staring back at me.
It was Sooyeon. Me. The monster.
I remember how I hurt them. How I took their lives away. How I lost control. How I let the monster in me take over.
This is not what I wanted.
This is not how I imagined my life to be.
No.
I am the monster.
I hurt people. I take the ones important to them. I take away lives of people.
I need to be punished. To be wiped out of this world. I do not deserve to live. Death is not the suitable punishment. There has to be something graver. But there’s no other option. It is death that awaits me. It is death that I deserve.
*
I stare at the mirror. Taking one last look at the monster I see.
I held up the gun, placed the muzzle in my mouth and took one last breath.
*BANG*
END