The Result of Too Much Reflection
Each year I go to Relay, I end up leaving earlier than the year before. You'd think I'd learn after the first 3 years, but nope.
Anyway, I had lots and lots of time for reflection on the past, present, and future, and I've come up with one major generalization: my life is always a disappointment.
It might sound dumb, but its completely true. Even when I set my expectations low, I'm STILL disappointed. Even when good things happen, I still have reason for disappointment (won't go into detail, but I found faults in most of my really good times this year). Sure I'm being a pessimist, but I've never really had those moments or times where I can think, "Man, this can't get any better than this!" It's weird...when it comes to clothes, food, cars, and technology (tv, cell phone, computer, etc.), I'm pretty satisfied with the basic, average stuff, but when it comes to life, I just can't be pleased...
I was asked tonight by a friend, "When you're in college, what is the one thing you will remember from your senior year in high school?" Now, you'd think I'd have a good answer to that question, but really I don't. My answer: getting my acceptance to college. x_x
I apologize to the group of friends who stayed later into the night just to appease me. I know you girls were just trying to be good friends, but it's not in my personality to appreciate unwanted pity. I hate being a burden to people, so try not to torture yourselves for me anymore!
So while sitting around the APAC fire, my friend Kirk asked, "Hey, does anyone wanna just go for a walk and complain about how much life sucks?" Heh, sorry Kirk, been there, DONE THAT!
Ah, my rant is done. Time for some much desired sleep...