Retrospect of bothering....muahaha
oh claire...the disastor they call your face beams through the pits of hell onto my dinner plate. Like a thrown up meatball peeking through some marinara sauce....
basically I wanted to say hi but it didn't seem poetic enough. anyway...i hate you. no lie, i really do. i would like to kick you back to yesterday and run and hide. you smell. and it is only going to get worse.
love you lots,
Princess Emily
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Dose of Kristen my ass...more like you guys need a dose of me!! CAUSE WE KNOW HOW MUCH YA'LL LOVE ME!!!
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To the Other Matt-
I was just about to say...how are her pictures vain!? If that is vain...then I am screwed...
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You know you love the Possum Whore....thank you very much.
By the way how is the insane asylum? Jesnusus giving you any trouble??
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whoa beasty....you know what I am thinking of? Yes. Exactly. I am going to become a hindu. Nah not really. I am pretty stuck on being a pres. But I am stuck at this moment watching a video on Hindu's. Meh...but I must watch it all because I need it to graduate! Insane in the membrane.
I went to a carnival last night. And I also saw fireworks last night as well. They were pretty sweet. Mind you it was nothing compared to Disney World fireworks but I think it was the atmosphere that made it amazing. My uncle has this house in Havre de Grace and we watched them on this hill right next to the water. Gorgeous. Pure bliss. Yeah...well sort of.
Anyway happy 4th of July! Miss you mucho! We need a real party. AND I also looked at Busch Garden tickets, it is going to be 50 for the tickets so get your money ready.
TOODLES!
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Once apon a time there was a girl. Now this girl could not be compared to any other female that had graced the earth because she had the beauty that surpassed even the godesses of the roman beliefe. Yes, basically she would knock the socks off of anyone and probably even send their toes flying off in different directions. Now this girl...has no more of a story at the moment. I just felt like leaving a weird comment as I quite frequently do. It is my gift. Neigh, it is an art. An art which I shall attempt to study in solitary for the next 10 minutes and become and almighty master at. Then I shall sit on top of a mountain and people from far and wide will come to seek my wisdom of randomness. They will bombard me with stupid questions like, "Should I use drugs to help me in my quest? Or even resort to alcohol?" And I shall answer all of those retards alike by blaring the holy plastic trumpet in their face therefore signaling an absolute resounding, "NO!". I will have them sit at my feet and hear tales of my great ramblings. Stories that will by then have become legends. Like the story of when I had my best friend instatuinalized. And more stories that will later come into affect. These students that come to learn from me will fast as I do on jello, cookies, soda, fake beer, chocolate, fruit, beans, more chocolate, some chicken, steak, salmon, shrimp, fried shrimp, steamed shrimp, shrimp gumbo, shrimp salad, leaves and twigs.
Whew...to put things in a nutshell, "Bow down to me." Then again who would ever in their right mind want to be in a nutshell? It would be rather dark, I imagine a little musty and probably at this time of year a tad bit hot. Unless you got the upgraded nutshell that had air conditioning. In which case I ask, "May I live with you in your nutshell cause I am way to hot."
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idont
hehe. No really I do. I ALWAYS MISS MY SHNUKLEYDOOS!
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A mad scientist? How so?
Although I will be a "scientist in training" next year! And I suppose I can be considered "mad" at some points. Definetly never ragh-grr-rip-off-your-head-and-stomp-it-to-the-ground mad but mad crazy mad...oui! Smack me with the label, I am admittatly psycho. Don't go spreading that though...we wouldn't want everyone to know I am crazy. How about we just let them all think I am still a drunkard. It is more interesting that way. And then when I see someone I don't like I can be like, "Oyyy youuuuuuuu. I hate you. Yesh I dooo. Doncha worry...I am drunk...and you won't remember this." Of course all my words will be slurred and I will be falling on them. I will practice for you down at the beach.
Anyway dahling. I love you. I really, really do. I love you. I hope you love me too. I look in your eyes and I think that your great. Stick with me a while and I will always be your mate. I love you. Your better then ice cream. I love you...
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Clairey, Clairey. How sad it is to know you have left us for the freaky-deaky-do West Virginia folks. You missed the most awesomest week ever! We had such a blast it blasted right through my belly button and made a jewel go through too! HAHE...which is funnier then haha or hehe.
Lets see highlights of the week were; getting drunk, having Kris tell me her life story, running a red light, being hit on by the funniest people, buying hermies, getting pierced and making some hott Philly friends. Oh my. You missed one heck of a week.
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Watsh shnup? I am bored as usual. I actually wrote you this REALLY long comment at work the other day and then another girl came behind me and closed it before I could send it. Basically it said something like. Remember fishy my love? And how Kris killed it. I wanted to call you fishy my love for some reason. Remember when I wore a tiara to prom, Kris wore a flower and you wore a dead fish? Those were some good times. That was also when you had squirrel feet and I had a sign that read, "I still look the best." and Kristen had some evil pox. Remember when we were bugs?? Or when we drove around your neighborhood in plastic cars? Or in some cases stationary wagons. Or when we ate bunches of gummy bears? And you made the ultimate "movie"? Or we tricked you into eating a jalepeno? Or when we danced at the gas station? Or played "rocksa-downa-shirta"? Or when someone dressed in a garbage bag, someone in foil armadillo outfit and someone was mauled and bleeding out ketchup? Or when we jumped on the trampoline in the rain? Or wore turbans on our heads? Or when we were molested by Pluto? Or when we ballroom danced? Or when we watched all of the Anne of Green Gables? Or when we watched the evil Gone with the Wind movie with your dad? Wonderful.
What I am trying to said is, we are the coolest people ever. We could rock everyones socks off!!
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You smell gorgeous! hehe...whoa...compliment...perhaps this school is good for me...*ponders this for a moment or two*
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Hey...remember me?
Will you remember me? I will remember you...Don't let your love, pass you by...
Ok that is it for the singing. I made a song up the other day! It was about how I break everything in my room and I will be charged a huge fine. Pretty funny.
Remember when I was going to become the master of randomness? Or I was the master actually? I feel like my randomness has taken a toll for the worse. Kind of disappering. Sad day in Texas most definetly.
Remember when I made my theory about the sad day in Texas? That was funny too. You know what I like. The sounds the keys make when I press on them. Like the keyboard sounds. It makes me happy to hear them. Makes me feel...smart? Or random? Or both.
Guess what I am doing tonight? Going to a Beatles thingy-mer-boper. Yay! Guess what my shirt said last night? "Hooters" I was a Hooters girl last night. Crazy. And I wore a cow girl hat and this guy asked if he could borrow it. Yes he wanted to borrow my friends girly cow girl hat to wear around. Pretty crazy.
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SMERTA!? OH MY GOSH! REMEMBER HOW FLIPPIN' COOL HE WAS!
So cool in fact I HAD to use caps there. It just made me that happy! Oh his golashes and lama coat. His bowl cut hair. Stutter and shifty eyes...hey is that where you picked up the shifty eyes!? From your "study" sessions in the broom closet. "Umm Claire....want to meet me at Barnes and Nobles to go over home work Saturday? You can give me a call on my home number. Just don't mention anything about our love sessions in the broom closet to my wife." Ok maybe he didn't say that...but he wanted to.
And the you dissapointed him so badly! Two week before the last class. "CLAIRE! FROM NOW ON YOU WILL SIT UP HERE!"
And then we never saw him again. Poor dude.
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Hola chica! What shnup? I was showing Cathy Liu your page because I really wanted her to hear you sing. Anyway...I then realized how I use to leave you incrediably long comments about nothing at all. And I decided, "Tonight. I shall leave her a long random comment tonight." And at that moment I made my promise and now I come to fulfill. I am like a conquerer. "I my fair lady have come to fulfill my honor and duty to my country and the crown! I have slayed manyth a dragon to come to this great land. I have tread upon many a soil and even preformed a few tests in my time and found that Pleasent Village has the highest percentage of nitrogen and I persuaded them to plant more soy beans. They shall then learn the art of making soy products like tofu. Cause I have learned in my travels that a lot of people eat tofu. I still stay away from tofu because God gave me chickens for a reason. And I declare that one shall beware of the stir-fry bar because sometimes the pans that are labeled 'Chicken' have square chunks. Square chunks are from the Pleasent Village devils. Damn. Why did I tell them to plant soy beans!? I HATE SOY BEANS! I know the plan! My fair lady I must leave for I have a village to pilfer and burn! I can now go steal that old lady on 'Ol' Dung' lane's candle sticks. Ta-ta for now!" *gallops off into the...sunset...(I didn't want it to be so cliche but alas there isn't much else. It could be the moon but that isn't fun. The stars is to girly. The rising sun is to promising. The nuclear bomb would be cool.) *EDIT* into the nuclear bomb*
Guess what? In 10 days I am going to Hawaii! I really can't believe it! I AM SO EXCITED...bahaha. I will take many pictures so that I may attempt at inducing a pure jealous rage in you.
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Holy Shitake mushrooms! Did you know there is a character limit for comments!? I definetly never knew that. But now I do. And now so do you. And so does everyone else in this world that has read this comment. Or at least that sentance. Anyway back to what I was saying...
Oh and I am quitting being a bio/pre student! I am going into psychology!! I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT THAT TOO! I can't wait for next semester to start now. The classes they offer sound so interesting. Mmm...happiness. Now I just have to finish this semester.
Miss me? Maybe a bit?
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There is this thing called Thanksgiving coming up. Perhaps you have heard of it? Well you see schools in this country decided it would be nice to give children off so they could get fatter and give thanks. Although we all know that all kids in this country are spoiled brats and will not give thanks for God's gifts to them and instead whine that they don't own the new mini ipod with video screen when lil susie down the road does. But those lil brats are besides the point. Wayyy besides the point. My point and motive for writing to you on such a fabulous Sunday night is to inform you that I am one of such children to get off of school. And yes I am one of such children that are considered brats. But don't fear I will still give thanks...and quietly gripe at not owning a mini ipod with video screen...or ipod at all for that matter.
Once again what I am trying to get at all beastly Claire Bear is that I want to visit with yours truly. You! We need to party it up like we have something to be thankful for! YAY! I am pretty flippin excited.
Anyway I miss you a bijilion elephant tons and I can't wait to hang out. We might have to make a trip to Columbia mall as well to go play fun games there. Muahaha. Or go see Harry Potter! Or just party and watch tv/movies like we normally do!!
YAY!
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Claire Bear! Do you miss me at all? I miss you! After Wed. I am out of classes till next semester! I will need a friend to hang out with...otherwise I will sit in my house and sleep 24/7.
Anyway I miss you tons...and I am sitting around awake....we just had a horrible fire drill...no good.
LOVE YOU CHICA MOLE RAT WALL LOVER!!!
The fajah. You know, the majah and the fajah. The majah says, "Ho de hum I am cleaning.La de da." And the fajah says, "I bring home je bacon."
Speaking of Bacon;
Everywhere there's lots of piggies
Living piggy lives
You can see them out for dinner
With their piggy wives
Clutching forks and knives to eat their bacon.
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III LOOOVEEE GOLLLDDDDDD!!!!!!
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Oh you know you like it. In fact, you LOVE it! Ha. Wonderful. Can we make chocolate squirrels? Brick, I meant to tell you. I ate your chocolate squirrel. Yay!
Smooth move Foreman....
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Shnookums! Oh how I have missed thee! Shall I compare thee to a summers day? Neigh. Your face shall only beeth compared to the underside of a naked mole rat? For in such likeness you are. (Shakespear has nothing on me!)
Ahem...well now that is out of me. I am planning trips, as I frequently say I do during the summer months, and these trips are a) to Busch Gardens and b) camping. I have decided that if we feel like doing both then you shall be in charge of planning camping since you did such an extrodinary job last time. Therefore I dub thee camping extrodinare!
Toodles my dahling. The damage is done! Mushahahshsha!
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So missa Kwisten...sup bisnatch?
I tried to call you today and your sister said you were sleeping. Damn your naps. I needed to talk to you. My life is ruined and you can't be there to tell me it is ok. Ragh. The evil maharaja may smite you. *smite*
Ahem...speakage is necessary. So is your precense at a certain party this week. Ahemage over.
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Have I told you before that I find you to be a weeeirrdooo?
OH OH! LOOK AT THIS!
Ah nevermind. I realized it would take up way to much space.
I have got a bunch of lovely coconuts....
Remember back in the day when we were innocent Disney princess. Now look at you. You are a self proclaimed dirty pirate hooker. Oh wait, my mom said she agrees after last night.
And what am I? Nothing but a possum whore. I just might have to change my name to that.
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Yo bisnatch...I know you are on...I am stalking you...muahaha. Or should it be BAJ-HA-HA-HA! I AM FRIGGIN HOME!!! AND I HAVE NEWS TO TURN THE WORLD ALL THE WAY AROUND AND SLAP IT BACK TO TIMBUCKTOO...hella sweeta in and out...
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Ahemster here. No not a hamster...ahemster. You know this won't be as exciting because you are sitting here reading it. Therefore...I shall have to poke your eyes out so you can't read it now. Then you can get your surgery to get new eyes. Glass ones...good idea.
So I told you the news...and how ironic we are also having a party! I think I am a...o you know. I have ESPN...haha! I AM HILARIOUS!! HEAR ME ROAR! *ROAR* BEASTLY!!!
For some reason the English thought, "Lets build a barn and put a beast in it." BEASTLY BARN! By the way...the VW bug...glorious.
Do you need flowers? 24.99? I can do it. BE AGGRESSIVE...chocolate eyes? Stabbing bracelets...what is the world coming to?
Toodles darling... this is hella sweeta!
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Ahem...Aren't you happy I have commented? Doesn't it make you feel loved? Or at least make you feel cool? Or would a possom bush baby make you feel cooler? Or would that be hotter? Maybe screaming PUERTO RICO!? O the decisions of life.
Second Ahem...otherwise known as ahem ahem. I have lots of new for you. We need another party for it all. Yay yay for Emily. Yippy Yippy yum yum!
Ahem Ahem Ahem. Yes that was my ahem to the third power. I think your name needs to change to K dawg as it originally was. That or Gilla Monster Motor Butt.
Hella Sweeta....