Started dancing again over the weekend. Am back to working out as of today. Not going to bother altering my food. That never seems to do any good any way. Not to mention it's too much hassle to keep track of. Plus it makes me obsessive to constantly be monitoring my every bite/judging every calorie.I would like to see 125 by 6/1/12. Not going to do ( Read more... )

Seems everywhere I look friends are either falling in love, getting engaged, getting married, having anniversaries, newly pregnant or having babies. I'm happy for each and every one....truly and deeply. I'm also envious. I want to be in love. I want to be married. I want to have another baby. When will it be my turn? It's been just under three ( Read more... )

Feeling slightly betterish than yesterday. I got to hang out with my bestie and bunco chickas last night so that helped. It also helped to vent here and to my bestie last night. Kind of got to release the pressure. Plus I don't like to mope for too long. It builds up, I pout and bitch for a day, then I just bury it down again. It will spring up ( Read more... )

I'm tired of feeling unappreciated, disrespected and that I only exist when I can serve some kind of purpose in your life or in other words completely used. Never a kind word or gesture certainly never in public. No credit for all that I do to keep your life running smooth. No aknowledgment to the help that's been given or when one of my ideas is ( Read more... )

Just reread my last post, because frankly I couldn't remember when or what I posted last. It's sad that in two months absolutely nothing has changed. I'm just in this holding pattern of unhappiness. I need help, but from where? I don't need a shrink as it's not depression. I'm not just sad/unhappy without reason. Real depression is a deep down ( Read more... )

There is so much I'd like to change about my life, but I have no idea how to set about doing it without making things worse. That makes me feel trapped. Which makes me feel as if I'm wasting the only life I have to live. It's not like I'm not thankful for the things I have or the wonderful people in my life, because I am grateful for all that I do ( Read more... )

IM and Facebook are the worst things to happen to working me ( Read more... )

The worst of the PMS seems to be behind me now. I think my last post (rant) was the very last of it, because I went home determined to have a nice evening with my boy and we've been fine ever since. On top of that E is very intuitive/perceptive to the feelings of others. I think he got it that mom was off and seemed to make special efforts too ( Read more... )

E and I had the most amazing weekend ( Read more... )

Yesterday I did not get an evening workout and went a smidge over my calories and it showed in the scale today. Instead of losing a full pound, like I have been, I lost .4. Which is normal, and I know I can't expect to lose a pound a day for long. Just the same I'd like it to last a bit longer :). Like maybe the next 20 days/lbs ( Read more... )