once upon a fictional scenario
once upon a fictional scenario
exo, slightly yixing-centric
pg-13; general, au/ar, humor
~in dedication to all those suspicious candids of lay looking like a drug dealer~
Lay walked briskly to the company building, all the while clutching his MCM bag to his chest like a child. He glanced at his sides briefly, his breathing slightly elevated. He clumsily made his way to the glass sliding doors at the back entrance.
Luckily, only one fan seemed to be present; she was dressed in a tacky pullover and black tights. She pushed up her classes and smirked. Lay couldn't help but feel uneasy as they neared each other. He was surprised to see that she did not have a camera phone or DSLR on hand.
He bowed half-heartedly, eager to get inside of the building. As he turned to punch in the PIN number, the fan pressed something to this chest.
It was a crumpled, brown paper bag. Lay only cocked an eyebrow before looking into it. Upon recognizing what it was, he stuttered, "This.. this is.."
The fan chuckled and patted him on the shoulder before departing.
Lay was left dumbfounded. He remained in .JPG mode for a whole ten minutes before silently entering the building.
"Great work, guys!" The choreographer said approvingly, "At this rate, comeback should be no later than November of next year! Everyone, go home and rest. Don't forget to be here tomorrow at six, to go over the second half of the choreography!"
"Yes!"
"Right, sir."
"Yes."
"Okay!"
Murmured voices and exasperated breaths filled the room as the choreographer left. Lay leaned against one of the wall mirrors, sweat dripping out of every orifice. Luhan and Tao walked over to him, and handed him a water.
"So, you wanna hang at Han River tonight?" Luhan said with a boyish smile.
Lay shook his head, "I, uh.. I promised Jongdae and Minseok-hyung that I'd run over the steps with them."
Tao and Luhan exchanged glances. Luhan punched Lay on the arm, "Come on, man, we haven't had man-to-man talks in a long time. And besides, I've been watching Minseok - and he's doing fine. And Jongdae... he'll catch up tomorrow."
But Lay insisted, "No, really. I've gotta.. do stuff. I promised them I'd help them out."
Luhan sighed and rolled his eyes. "Fine, whatever. Me and Taozi are gonna go kick a ball around for awhile -"
"Maybe get some braised eggs." Tao commented, earning himself a slap on the chest.
"- we'll be there until two, if you change your mind." The two men left, grabbing their gym bags prior to exiting. Soon after, all the EXO members left for home until only two others remained.
Chen, Xiumin, and Lay made their way to the stairs outside the cafeteria. They huddled behind a trashcan and brought out their backpacks. The sound of sliding zippers commenced, followed by a collective sigh of relief and bliss. The members passed the brown paper bag around, Lay took out a couple more bags and shared them with the others.
"Oh man, that's the stuff."
"Wow, I'm impressed. You actually got the good kind this time."
"I just wish it wasn't so fucking expensive."
It wasn't soon before they finished the bags. Minseok let out a big breath before speaking, "I can't believe we just finished the whole thing off."
"Yeah.. do you think we should have saved some, though?" Chen asked naively, picking at his gums.
Lay shook his head and swung his backpack over his shoulders. "No, if anyone ever caught us with it, we'd be dead."
"But... how are we gonna get more?" Chen looked to Xiumin, who shrugged in response.
"We'll manage somehow. If it takes money to buy us happiness," Lay stood up. "so be it."
The other two nodded and stood up. They all looked at each other and nodded once more.
"Remember, no one can know we're doing this."
As the three exited the company building and walked off to their dorms, a figure emerged from the cafeteria. Suho looked at the departing members with concern. Were they... doing drugs?
He didn't like the sound of what was happening; as a leader, it was his responsibility to insure the safety and health of his members. He couldn't just go on allowing them to ruin their lives like this. He had to do something, but what?
Suho nodded with a stern look on his face, said to no one in particular, "I don't like the sound of what's happening here. As a leader, it is my responsibility to insure the safety and health of my members. I can't just go on allowing them to ruin their lives like this! I have to do something! But what?"
He contemplated for several minutes before realizing that he was standing in the middle of an empty corridor at night, and then left to go home to contemplate his decisions there.
According to Suho, the three members of M had been meeting more frequently. Or at least it seemed so. Regular meetings everyday could be deemed 'frequent' enough. And then he realized that they met everyday because they had choreo practice everyday. Darn.
Still, Suho couldn't shake off the feeling that something immoral was going down. He tried to snap out of the detective mindset -tried to distract himself by focusing on his dancing and vocal training. And yet, he still caught himself looking over towards Lay, Xiumin, and Chen...
"Alright, quick break! Everyone, go hydrate yourselves in the cafeteria!"
Suho's eyes quickly darted to the mischievous trio. They seemed to be making their way to the washroom, which would have been perfectly normal had he not witnessed their suspicious rendevouz that one night. This is it, he thought, this is my chance!
He ran into the men's washroom and jumped in front of the crouched-over men. They flinched instinctively, exposing the infamous brown paper bag to Suho's eyes.
"A-HA! I caught you! - wait, is that..."
"Alright, back in formation!"
Kai, who was stretching his hamstrings, noticed the sullen presence of his leader. He walked over to the flustered Suho. "Hey, hyung, you alright?"
"I.." Suho appeared on the verge of tears. "I feel so ashamed."
"Joonmyun-hyung.." Kai said softly.
"Don't talk to me," The leader replied bitterly. He sounded like he was crying. "I feel so unclean!"
He swaddled over to the other side of the room and sat by himself in the corner. Kai frowned and proceeded on with his pre-dancing exercises.
The next few days, Lay found himself harboring his addiction with a new member. Suho had seemed impartial and even disgusted by their routine at first, but it wasn't soon before he finally succumbed. He even brought his own share to the group one time.
Lay was on his way to the company building when he was stopped by Tao. "Xing-ge, what are you doing here? I thought you left an hour ago?"
Lay instinctively tightened his grip on his MCM backpack, and smiled nervously. "Yeah, I did. But I forgot my jacket."
"You're wearing it right now, ge." Tao said, pointing to his monochrome Letterman jacket.
"Oh. Well, uh," Lay shifted his gaze to a streetlight nearby. "I forgot my light.. my light-colored jacket. Yeah, that's it."
Tao narrowed his eyes and was about to shrug it off when he noticed Lay hugging his bag closer to his chest. He gestured to the backpack. "What do you have in there?"
"Um.. what?"
"The bag, what's in the bag?" Tao crossed his arms. "I know you're crazy about your MCM accessories but I don't think I've seen you let go of that backpack once."
"It's.. it's nothing, Taozi. Really." Lay tried to maneuver around the taller boy, but only ended up meeting face to chest.. He sighed and replied tiredly, "Okay, you caught me. I've been hoarding braised eggs this whole time."
Tao remained silent for awhile, and let out a raspy laugh. He patted Lay's shoulder, "I get it, I get it - I won't pry anymore. Just.. stop acting so suspicious, ge. You've got me thinking things."
"...Right." Lay nodded. "Good night, Tao."
"'Night, Xing-Xing."
"- and then he said that he was holding braised eggs the whole time," Tao told Luhan. They were sitting in the middle of the basketball court nearby their dormitory. Tao shivered from the cool night breeze. "Do you think he really had braised eggs with him?"
Luhan scratched his chin, and replied, "No, I don't think so. Yixing's never really been for braised eggs, he's more of a snacks guy honestly."
"He's been acting really weird though..."
"Yeah..."
"Do you think he's on drugs?"
Luhan shot Tao an offended look. "What?"
"Well, I don't know. I remember one time during practice, Joonmyun-ge was telling me that some of the members were doing drugs or something," Tao said casually. He sprawled himself out on the asphalt and laid his head on his bag.
"Drugs, huh? Well," Luhan stood up and brushed the dirt off his shorts. He gave Tao a light kick. "I think it's safe to say that K Leader just likes to talk. Come on, let's go home."
"You guys, don't you think we should meet somewhere else? I mean, this looks pretty suspicious." Suho commented. The four look at each other, huddled together in a little corner in the company's washroom with their hoods drawn up. "It looks like were dealing meth or something."
Chen turned towards Suho slowly. "Didn't you think we were dealing meth?"
The two stared at each other in an awkward silence. Xiumin patted his stomach and sighed. "Man, I don't even care about that anymore. I'm just glad I can finally take a break from this God forsaken diet."
"Yeah..." The other three replied in unison, unsure of how to answer.
"I guess we should probably clean up, huh?" Suho suggested.
Lay pulled out another paper bag. "One of the fans gave me this."
"You never really run out of these things, do you?" Chen said, raising an eyebrow. Lay shrugged.
"Okay, we'll finish this last bag off, AND THEN we'll go home." Suho confirmed to no one.
The members dug into the bag and pulled out small plastic sandwich bags filled with...
...braised eggs.
Lay looked at the others and said sternly, "Remember, guys, no one can know we have these. If Luhan or Tao ever saw me eating one, I'd never hear the end of it."
"And if the trainers ever saw me eating these, I'd never hear the end of that." Xiumin commented, letting out a small chuckle.
Everyone laughed and held up their eggs in a 'one for all, all for one' gesture. Then they stopped moving like in one of those cheesy freezeframes at the end of every 80's sitcom. But it's not like they stayed that way forever. Most likely, they finished off the rest of the braised eggs and threw away their litter (because they're idols, of course) and went home only to restart the whole meaningless process routine again the next day.
A/N: ...God, I don't even know. I just.. I. *sigh*
I'm gonna go lay down and try to regrow some of the brain cells I lost.
exo, slightly yixing-centric
pg-13; general, au/ar, humor
~in dedication to all those suspicious candids of lay looking like a drug dealer~
Lay walked briskly to the company building, all the while clutching his MCM bag to his chest like a child. He glanced at his sides briefly, his breathing slightly elevated. He clumsily made his way to the glass sliding doors at the back entrance.
Luckily, only one fan seemed to be present; she was dressed in a tacky pullover and black tights. She pushed up her classes and smirked. Lay couldn't help but feel uneasy as they neared each other. He was surprised to see that she did not have a camera phone or DSLR on hand.
He bowed half-heartedly, eager to get inside of the building. As he turned to punch in the PIN number, the fan pressed something to this chest.
It was a crumpled, brown paper bag. Lay only cocked an eyebrow before looking into it. Upon recognizing what it was, he stuttered, "This.. this is.."
The fan chuckled and patted him on the shoulder before departing.
Lay was left dumbfounded. He remained in .JPG mode for a whole ten minutes before silently entering the building.
"Great work, guys!" The choreographer said approvingly, "At this rate, comeback should be no later than November of next year! Everyone, go home and rest. Don't forget to be here tomorrow at six, to go over the second half of the choreography!"
"Yes!"
"Right, sir."
"Yes."
"Okay!"
Murmured voices and exasperated breaths filled the room as the choreographer left. Lay leaned against one of the wall mirrors, sweat dripping out of every orifice. Luhan and Tao walked over to him, and handed him a water.
"So, you wanna hang at Han River tonight?" Luhan said with a boyish smile.
Lay shook his head, "I, uh.. I promised Jongdae and Minseok-hyung that I'd run over the steps with them."
Tao and Luhan exchanged glances. Luhan punched Lay on the arm, "Come on, man, we haven't had man-to-man talks in a long time. And besides, I've been watching Minseok - and he's doing fine. And Jongdae... he'll catch up tomorrow."
But Lay insisted, "No, really. I've gotta.. do stuff. I promised them I'd help them out."
Luhan sighed and rolled his eyes. "Fine, whatever. Me and Taozi are gonna go kick a ball around for awhile -"
"Maybe get some braised eggs." Tao commented, earning himself a slap on the chest.
"- we'll be there until two, if you change your mind." The two men left, grabbing their gym bags prior to exiting. Soon after, all the EXO members left for home until only two others remained.
Chen, Xiumin, and Lay made their way to the stairs outside the cafeteria. They huddled behind a trashcan and brought out their backpacks. The sound of sliding zippers commenced, followed by a collective sigh of relief and bliss. The members passed the brown paper bag around, Lay took out a couple more bags and shared them with the others.
"Oh man, that's the stuff."
"Wow, I'm impressed. You actually got the good kind this time."
"I just wish it wasn't so fucking expensive."
It wasn't soon before they finished the bags. Minseok let out a big breath before speaking, "I can't believe we just finished the whole thing off."
"Yeah.. do you think we should have saved some, though?" Chen asked naively, picking at his gums.
Lay shook his head and swung his backpack over his shoulders. "No, if anyone ever caught us with it, we'd be dead."
"But... how are we gonna get more?" Chen looked to Xiumin, who shrugged in response.
"We'll manage somehow. If it takes money to buy us happiness," Lay stood up. "so be it."
The other two nodded and stood up. They all looked at each other and nodded once more.
"Remember, no one can know we're doing this."
As the three exited the company building and walked off to their dorms, a figure emerged from the cafeteria. Suho looked at the departing members with concern. Were they... doing drugs?
He didn't like the sound of what was happening; as a leader, it was his responsibility to insure the safety and health of his members. He couldn't just go on allowing them to ruin their lives like this. He had to do something, but what?
Suho nodded with a stern look on his face, said to no one in particular, "I don't like the sound of what's happening here. As a leader, it is my responsibility to insure the safety and health of my members. I can't just go on allowing them to ruin their lives like this! I have to do something! But what?"
He contemplated for several minutes before realizing that he was standing in the middle of an empty corridor at night, and then left to go home to contemplate his decisions there.
According to Suho, the three members of M had been meeting more frequently. Or at least it seemed so. Regular meetings everyday could be deemed 'frequent' enough. And then he realized that they met everyday because they had choreo practice everyday. Darn.
Still, Suho couldn't shake off the feeling that something immoral was going down. He tried to snap out of the detective mindset -tried to distract himself by focusing on his dancing and vocal training. And yet, he still caught himself looking over towards Lay, Xiumin, and Chen...
"Alright, quick break! Everyone, go hydrate yourselves in the cafeteria!"
Suho's eyes quickly darted to the mischievous trio. They seemed to be making their way to the washroom, which would have been perfectly normal had he not witnessed their suspicious rendevouz that one night. This is it, he thought, this is my chance!
He ran into the men's washroom and jumped in front of the crouched-over men. They flinched instinctively, exposing the infamous brown paper bag to Suho's eyes.
"A-HA! I caught you! - wait, is that..."
"Alright, back in formation!"
Kai, who was stretching his hamstrings, noticed the sullen presence of his leader. He walked over to the flustered Suho. "Hey, hyung, you alright?"
"I.." Suho appeared on the verge of tears. "I feel so ashamed."
"Joonmyun-hyung.." Kai said softly.
"Don't talk to me," The leader replied bitterly. He sounded like he was crying. "I feel so unclean!"
He swaddled over to the other side of the room and sat by himself in the corner. Kai frowned and proceeded on with his pre-dancing exercises.
The next few days, Lay found himself harboring his addiction with a new member. Suho had seemed impartial and even disgusted by their routine at first, but it wasn't soon before he finally succumbed. He even brought his own share to the group one time.
Lay was on his way to the company building when he was stopped by Tao. "Xing-ge, what are you doing here? I thought you left an hour ago?"
Lay instinctively tightened his grip on his MCM backpack, and smiled nervously. "Yeah, I did. But I forgot my jacket."
"You're wearing it right now, ge." Tao said, pointing to his monochrome Letterman jacket.
"Oh. Well, uh," Lay shifted his gaze to a streetlight nearby. "I forgot my light.. my light-colored jacket. Yeah, that's it."
Tao narrowed his eyes and was about to shrug it off when he noticed Lay hugging his bag closer to his chest. He gestured to the backpack. "What do you have in there?"
"Um.. what?"
"The bag, what's in the bag?" Tao crossed his arms. "I know you're crazy about your MCM accessories but I don't think I've seen you let go of that backpack once."
"It's.. it's nothing, Taozi. Really." Lay tried to maneuver around the taller boy, but only ended up meeting face to chest.. He sighed and replied tiredly, "Okay, you caught me. I've been hoarding braised eggs this whole time."
Tao remained silent for awhile, and let out a raspy laugh. He patted Lay's shoulder, "I get it, I get it - I won't pry anymore. Just.. stop acting so suspicious, ge. You've got me thinking things."
"...Right." Lay nodded. "Good night, Tao."
"'Night, Xing-Xing."
"- and then he said that he was holding braised eggs the whole time," Tao told Luhan. They were sitting in the middle of the basketball court nearby their dormitory. Tao shivered from the cool night breeze. "Do you think he really had braised eggs with him?"
Luhan scratched his chin, and replied, "No, I don't think so. Yixing's never really been for braised eggs, he's more of a snacks guy honestly."
"He's been acting really weird though..."
"Yeah..."
"Do you think he's on drugs?"
Luhan shot Tao an offended look. "What?"
"Well, I don't know. I remember one time during practice, Joonmyun-ge was telling me that some of the members were doing drugs or something," Tao said casually. He sprawled himself out on the asphalt and laid his head on his bag.
"Drugs, huh? Well," Luhan stood up and brushed the dirt off his shorts. He gave Tao a light kick. "I think it's safe to say that K Leader just likes to talk. Come on, let's go home."
"You guys, don't you think we should meet somewhere else? I mean, this looks pretty suspicious." Suho commented. The four look at each other, huddled together in a little corner in the company's washroom with their hoods drawn up. "It looks like were dealing meth or something."
Chen turned towards Suho slowly. "Didn't you think we were dealing meth?"
The two stared at each other in an awkward silence. Xiumin patted his stomach and sighed. "Man, I don't even care about that anymore. I'm just glad I can finally take a break from this God forsaken diet."
"Yeah..." The other three replied in unison, unsure of how to answer.
"I guess we should probably clean up, huh?" Suho suggested.
Lay pulled out another paper bag. "One of the fans gave me this."
"You never really run out of these things, do you?" Chen said, raising an eyebrow. Lay shrugged.
"Okay, we'll finish this last bag off, AND THEN we'll go home." Suho confirmed to no one.
The members dug into the bag and pulled out small plastic sandwich bags filled with...
...braised eggs.
Lay looked at the others and said sternly, "Remember, guys, no one can know we have these. If Luhan or Tao ever saw me eating one, I'd never hear the end of it."
"And if the trainers ever saw me eating these, I'd never hear the end of that." Xiumin commented, letting out a small chuckle.
Everyone laughed and held up their eggs in a 'one for all, all for one' gesture. Then they stopped moving like in one of those cheesy freezeframes at the end of every 80's sitcom. But it's not like they stayed that way forever. Most likely, they finished off the rest of the braised eggs and threw away their litter (because they're idols, of course) and went home only to restart the whole meaningless process routine again the next day.
A/N: ...God, I don't even know. I just.. I. *sigh*
I'm gonna go lay down and try to regrow some of the brain cells I lost.