Walking, but only just
A restlessness has been growing inside me. Sometimes, late at night, I feel as though I could converse with it. The ability to walk from one side of the room to the other has not been much of a release. I finally managed to convince my medical jailer, Lady Salia, to allow me to see some of the reports that are arriving.
I thought having more information would help, but without being able to act on it, I feel much as I did when I first awoke but wasn't allowed to move. This is entirely maddening, and I fear that somebody is going to end up like Lord Solis if I'm not given someone or something to command other than my own arms and legs.
I worry that the person who might end up sharing Solis's fate might end up being whomever is currently in charge, should she ever end up within my sight-line. She's had the wherewithal to send out scouting parties, but she's sent them to where the cities used to be! After the last breaking, continents were split and mighty mountains born. Likely nothing is where it used to be. We need maps. Surely we need to find the old cities, but we have to think about where the new ones have to be. Rivers and rain and wind will all have changed. This new cavern system in which we're taking refuge should be a sufficient reminder of how much the world has changed.
We need to start stockpiling food and finding clerics who can produce it. It'll be at least a year before we have a good idea where new farms should be, and a year beyond that before the first harvests. There's no sign to indicate that Lady Short-sighted, whomever she may be, is doing anything of the sort. We don't have the time to do one thing at a time. Winter is coming.
One benefit of my invalidity is that I've needed to use meditation and prayer to calm myself, both skills that I have neglected lately. Six nights ago, my mind swirling with plans and my heart filled with Kye's continued terror, I finally reached out to Mystra for the first time since we were re-written by the Phoenix. All formality and propriety abandoned, I prostrated myself and whispered into the shadows.
Goddess Mystra, do you remember the sound of my voice?
I remember a time when my parents whispered to each other that I had the dragon's blood. A time when, lost and alone among so many, I sought you and you embraced me. I once sang your songs. Performed your rites. Taught your wisdom. That time has been burned from the past, and all but a few who remember it are dead, but I remember.
Do you remember the name 'Ylisarri Siannodel', Mystra? I have much to do, and I need your guidance to do it well.
She responded. I was suffused with a sudden sense of... acknowledgment. Since then, communing with her has been one of my two great comforts. She seems extraordinarily busy, which is to be expected, considering the state the world of magic must be in after what the Phoenix did. I haven't tried to weave since I woke, not even to light a candle. I wonder if it would work.
The other comfort is more temporal. Linli finally came to see me, or at least to watch me, last night while I was taking a restful meditation on my cot. I caught a glimpse of black hair at the entrance to the chamber, which by it self was almost too much for me.
"Linli?" I whispered, hopefully.
"Lisa? You gonna fry me?" the darkness whispered back.
I knew she thought I would blame her for my incarceration. I reached out to where I guessed she was. "Linli, please..."
From an entirely unexpected direction, a blur of hair, limbs, and cloth shot out of the shadows and flung itself into my arms. "OhmygodLisaIthoughtyouweregonnadie youwerebleedingfromeverywhere andAhrainandReynardgotzappedandKaylawassquished andKyewouldn'twakeup andthegroundmovedlikewham! andIdidn'tknowtheyweregonnafreezeyoulikethat pleasedon'tkillmeIdon'twantKyetodie..." She flung the words out as though they could carry the pain of their meaning away with the wind, barely giving herself time to form the sounds, much less take breath. When she finished, she buried her face in my chest and began bawling. She had so succinctly expressed our shared pain and fear that there was little to do but clutch her small frame to me and match her, sob for sob.
At long last, when we both ran out of tears, we laid together on my cot, her body curled against me and her hair tickling my nose, watching and listening to Kye breathe. Linli broke the rhythmic sound. "Is he gonna live?"
I took a shaky breath while I gathered my thoughts. "Of course. He's oath-bound to protect me, and I intend to put myself in the most mortal danger several more times. He'd never break his word to me." After a pause to swallow the tightness in my throat, I added, "Besides, do you think he could rest knowing that you and Kayla were running around unsupervised?"
She sniffled, said "Right," and was silent until she fell asleep. I eventually drifted off to the rhythms of Kye's breathing and her quiet snoring. She was gone when I awoke.
Please, wise Tyr and powerful Mystra and any other god who will listen, Kye is the very best of men and he deserves a rest in the land of peace beyond, but please don't let him have it yet. I'm lost without him.
I thought having more information would help, but without being able to act on it, I feel much as I did when I first awoke but wasn't allowed to move. This is entirely maddening, and I fear that somebody is going to end up like Lord Solis if I'm not given someone or something to command other than my own arms and legs.
I worry that the person who might end up sharing Solis's fate might end up being whomever is currently in charge, should she ever end up within my sight-line. She's had the wherewithal to send out scouting parties, but she's sent them to where the cities used to be! After the last breaking, continents were split and mighty mountains born. Likely nothing is where it used to be. We need maps. Surely we need to find the old cities, but we have to think about where the new ones have to be. Rivers and rain and wind will all have changed. This new cavern system in which we're taking refuge should be a sufficient reminder of how much the world has changed.
We need to start stockpiling food and finding clerics who can produce it. It'll be at least a year before we have a good idea where new farms should be, and a year beyond that before the first harvests. There's no sign to indicate that Lady Short-sighted, whomever she may be, is doing anything of the sort. We don't have the time to do one thing at a time. Winter is coming.
One benefit of my invalidity is that I've needed to use meditation and prayer to calm myself, both skills that I have neglected lately. Six nights ago, my mind swirling with plans and my heart filled with Kye's continued terror, I finally reached out to Mystra for the first time since we were re-written by the Phoenix. All formality and propriety abandoned, I prostrated myself and whispered into the shadows.
Goddess Mystra, do you remember the sound of my voice?
I remember a time when my parents whispered to each other that I had the dragon's blood. A time when, lost and alone among so many, I sought you and you embraced me. I once sang your songs. Performed your rites. Taught your wisdom. That time has been burned from the past, and all but a few who remember it are dead, but I remember.
Do you remember the name 'Ylisarri Siannodel', Mystra? I have much to do, and I need your guidance to do it well.
She responded. I was suffused with a sudden sense of... acknowledgment. Since then, communing with her has been one of my two great comforts. She seems extraordinarily busy, which is to be expected, considering the state the world of magic must be in after what the Phoenix did. I haven't tried to weave since I woke, not even to light a candle. I wonder if it would work.
The other comfort is more temporal. Linli finally came to see me, or at least to watch me, last night while I was taking a restful meditation on my cot. I caught a glimpse of black hair at the entrance to the chamber, which by it self was almost too much for me.
"Linli?" I whispered, hopefully.
"Lisa? You gonna fry me?" the darkness whispered back.
I knew she thought I would blame her for my incarceration. I reached out to where I guessed she was. "Linli, please..."
From an entirely unexpected direction, a blur of hair, limbs, and cloth shot out of the shadows and flung itself into my arms. "OhmygodLisaIthoughtyouweregonnadie youwerebleedingfromeverywhere andAhrainandReynardgotzappedandKaylawassquished andKyewouldn'twakeup andthegroundmovedlikewham! andIdidn'tknowtheyweregonnafreezeyoulikethat pleasedon'tkillmeIdon'twantKyetodie..." She flung the words out as though they could carry the pain of their meaning away with the wind, barely giving herself time to form the sounds, much less take breath. When she finished, she buried her face in my chest and began bawling. She had so succinctly expressed our shared pain and fear that there was little to do but clutch her small frame to me and match her, sob for sob.
At long last, when we both ran out of tears, we laid together on my cot, her body curled against me and her hair tickling my nose, watching and listening to Kye breathe. Linli broke the rhythmic sound. "Is he gonna live?"
I took a shaky breath while I gathered my thoughts. "Of course. He's oath-bound to protect me, and I intend to put myself in the most mortal danger several more times. He'd never break his word to me." After a pause to swallow the tightness in my throat, I added, "Besides, do you think he could rest knowing that you and Kayla were running around unsupervised?"
She sniffled, said "Right," and was silent until she fell asleep. I eventually drifted off to the rhythms of Kye's breathing and her quiet snoring. She was gone when I awoke.
Please, wise Tyr and powerful Mystra and any other god who will listen, Kye is the very best of men and he deserves a rest in the land of peace beyond, but please don't let him have it yet. I'm lost without him.