Comments | yokumiz: Fanfic of Natsu and Yukiya

yokumiz

Fanfic of Natsu and Yukiya

Dec 26, 2011 18:25

Translated my old fanfic of Natsu&Yukiya from Bandage for Harle. If you accidentally read it and wanna say something, your comments are super welcome, and...any correction in English is super welcome too...*wipe off sweat drops*

part 1

Natsu woke up when the window reflects the first blush of dawn. He touched his face and it was all soaked in tears ( Read more... )

Comments 6

our_scars December 26 2011, 22:44:06 UTC

AMKBDKAJSBFKJASBKFBJKASB AW, THIS IS SO CUTE <3<3<3

yokumiz December 26 2011, 22:51:38 UTC

fail...

I'm looking for a real comment >:|

our_scars December 26 2011, 22:59:42 UTC

I'll comment again after I read it for a third time~~
Would you mind if I add some corrections?

yokumiz December 26 2011, 23:01:01 UTC

actually i'm asking for correction!

springswan December 26 2011, 23:31:35 UTC

I like your way with the words. It's bit like poetry <3

our_scars December 27 2011, 00:16:05 UTC

Correction sent, now onto the story.
Loved the fact that it's not exactly the typical story one would read/write about them.
And I really like the way you describe things, specially the first scene.

I also liked that you put Yukiya as a human being instead of a robot with no feelings. And the fact that Natsu is the only one who knows that other side of him is adorable <3<3<3

I also like the last part with Natsu being overwhelmed by past and present memories, and even though he doesn't vocalize it, Yukiya feels his pain and lets out a sigh of worry.

OKAY, THAT WAS MY COMMENT 8D <3<3<3
JSBDKJAFAFB I LUV IT

Can you post about it on the comm? (72no_olympos.livejournal.com)