OOC: Log
Who: Tieria Erde you_are_unfit and Lockon Stratos smexysniper
What: Tieria and Lockon discuss their feelings, daaaaw.
Where: Their room at the resort they're staying in during the trip to the Bahamas.
When: July 12th, Saturday night fever,
Why: WE ARE GUNDAM.
The first day at the Bahamas had come to a close, and by the time all of them had decided to retire the hour was fairly late. Tieria had been eager to return to the condo in order to wash off the salt and sand, though he couldn't help but notice with disdain that the smell of the sea still clung to him. Dressed in a large green shirt and pajama bottoms, he continued to towel off his hair as he returned to the room he was sharing with Lockon, relieved to see the other man had not yet retired to bed.
"Lockon." He said to catch his attention, a nervous sort of determination on his face. "Remember when I requested a moment to speak with you? I wish to do so now."
Lockon turned to face Tieria with a warm smile. He noticed a certain determination in his eyes that let him know it was something important. "Yes, I do. Just give me a second while I change." He removed his shirt quickly and turned to the closet to find a new one. "Should I sit or should I stand?" He asked in a calm manner.
"Whatever is most comfortable for you." Tieria replied, taking a seat on one of the two queen sized beds as he removed the towel from his shoulders, folding it neatly and laying it on his lap. He smoothed his hair out while he waited for Lockon to finish changing.
Lockon slipped into his shirt and stretched a little before sitting on the bed facing Tieria. "Alright I think we're all set" he smiled gently "Go ahead, I'm all ears."
He took one look at Lockon's face before shifting his gaze away, suddenly at a loss for words. "I- I think-" A tinge of red stained his cheeks as Tieria stopped, frustrated at himself. He tooks a deep breathe before stubbornly continuing on. "I believe I am experience feelings for you. That are.. romantic in nature."
Lockon looked at him with a puzzled expression on his face; had he really just hear Tieria confess? He blinked a few times, looked around the room, took a few deep breaths and realized that he in fact was not hallucinating. He thought his words carefully knowing that whatever he said could easily be misinterpreted by Tieria's clueless nature. He approached Tieria's bed, lowering himself so their eyes could be at the same level- "So you're saying. . .you're in love with me?" he smiled gently yet again.
During the pause Tieria felt his heartbeat speed up, staying perfectly still as if afraid the slightest movement would alter the inevitable response. At the sound of shifting clothes, he dared to glance back, only to find Lockon in front of him. "I am not sure. I spoke with Hisoka-san, about having strong feelings. About different kinds of love. What he described sounded like the symptoms I experience around you."
"I see" He gently placed his hand on Tieria's now reddening white cheek "what sort of symptoms are these?"
"Elevated heart rate, shortness of breathe, lightheaded." He listed off clinically, his tone becoming a little hesitant at the touch of Lockon's hand. "He said, 'your life wouldn't make sense without that other person.' When you died, it was worse than when Veda had abandoned me."
"That sounds about right" he chuckled softly "I apologize once more for what I put you through. . . perhaps it was a selfish choice, I forgot to consider everyone's feelings, especially yours. But now I'm back, and I promise not to ever do it again" his hand caressed his cheek once more "And you know. . .since we're on the subject and all" -he smiled- I have something to tell you as well"
"That there is something on my face? But I just bathed." Tieria guessed with an expression that bordered between confusion and annoyance, mistaking Lockon's actions for brushing something off of his cheek.
"Um no no your face is fine. . ." He noticed the sudden change in his expression and realized that Tieria had once more misinterpreted him. He took Tieria's hand and held it tightly in his own whle looking firmly into his eyes "What I wanted to say was. . .my feelings towards you. . .are the same"
His red eyes widened in disbelief at Lockon's words, and a warmth spread through his chest at the feeling of their clasped hands. "You feel the same." He repeated shyly, unable to look away. "Even though I have proven to be weaker than you, you would still- Are you positive?"
"Weak? I don't believe you're weak, why do you keep saying that?" he chuckled softly "And yes" He held his hand tighter "I'm positive, very positive"
"Because I could not prevent-" His throat suddenly felt thick, as if he had lost his voice, and he found it hard to say the words out loud. Why had it been so much easier to type to others, but not to speak it to the person whom he trusted the most? "You know why, Lockon."
"Tieria. . .I'm sure you would have been able to stop him if he hadn't been a coward and drugged you the way he did. . ." He looked gently in his eyes "You're safe here with me, I promise" he placed his forehead gently against Tieria's and whispered "I won't let you come into harm again, never"
He closed his eyes in a vain attempt to fight back the tears that were forming. Why was he crying when he was here with Lockon, completely safe? He should be happy, especially after confessing and having his feelings returned. "Why are you able to make me feel so much? Why is it so easy to believe you?"
"Hmm" he smiled "I don't know. . .but love is like that, it rarely makes sense and in fact thats whats so wonderful about it" He stepped back a little in order to look into his eyes once more, which he noticed had tears overflowing. He wiped the tears with his finger and gentle caressed his cheek "Thank you for entrusting me with your heart." he smiled
For every tear brushed away a new one seemed to replace it, and Tieria tightened his grip on Lockon's hand. He leaned forward until his head rested against the other's shoulder. "Please take care of it. It is the first one I've had."
"It will be my pleasure" he whispered softly, as he caressed the back of the smaller one's head and held him securely against his body with his other arm. As he listened to the soft sound of Tieria's breathing, he knew that Tieria had finally found some peace after all the things he had went through before.
He curled into the embrace, allowing his silent tears to be absorbed by Lockon's shirt. Hesitantly he raised his own arms and wound them around the other's waist, a comfortable silence coming over them as the minutes passed by.
"It is strange." Tieria spoke after awhile, his voice soft but still audible. "Even though I am happy, I am crying. And even though I am crying, I feel like something bad has left me. I feel lighter."
"Those. . ." he said as he held him tighter "are tears of joy; Its normal to cry when you're happy or sad because they're strong emotions" he continued to caress his head " tears are a way to letting them out when they're too much to handle." He gently rested his head on Tieria's" You see? You're becoming more human without even noticing" he said with a soft chuckle.
"Is that what it is?" Tieria asked rhetorically, trying to compare his feelings against Lockon's explanation. Logically, it didn't make sense, and yet it felt right; before now all his tears had been of frustration and self loathing, but these.. were different. "Emotions do not make much sense, do they? Is that normal? To not understand them so easily?"
"No they never do; you can live a hundred years and never finish understanding them I think. So yes, its a very normal thing, so don't worry about it."
Tieria frowned, growing uncertain. "Then how do you know if you are labeling your feelings correctly? What if this is not love?"
"Um well, you just do. . .I mean what you can never understand is why they are so complex or why a certain someone is worthy of them" he swallowed hoping Tieria wouldn't question those feelings any longer.
He huffed a little at the vague answers, one hand reaching up to wipe away at his face; a good thing he hadn't put his glasses on after his shower or else this position would have been awkward. "It cannot be impossible to decipher them. That is why people enter into relationships, correct? Because they both know they are in love."
Lockon sighed "I meant why you cry when you're sad or happy, emotions like that are difficult to understand. No its not impossible, its just that love is different than all emotions, something inside you just tells you its right. Like that something that made you realize you loved me."
"Ah. This.. feels right. I do not like when others touch me, but when it is you, it is different. It reminds me that you are alive, and that is comforting." Tieria relaxed a little bit more as the tears began to subside, content to listen to Lockon's strong heartbeat. "As long as I am where you are, that is what matters."
Lockon smiled at these last words, and wondered if Tieria could feel his heart beating so fast. "As long as you can smile and I can keep you safe, I will be happy" he whispered softly.
Tieria blinked, taken aback by the simple words that reflecting his feelings so well. "That is what I want for you, as well. Our emotions really are the same." It was a relief to see what he had been told about love in action, their mirrored emotions giving him the proof he needed to be put at ease.
"Thats true. Wanting whats best for the one you love, thats also what love is all about" he gently kissed his head "Are you tired yet by the way?"
"Yes, but I want to clarify one more thing, first." Tieria pulled back enough so that he could look at Lockon, without breaking their hold on each other. "I have completed my mission objective and determined that we have identical feelings for each other. What is the next step? I did not discuss that far with Hisoka-san."
"N-next step?. . .You mean what happens after we are both aware we have feelings for each other? " For some reason Lockon felt nervous at his question but he tried to hide this by showing a relaxed expression on his face.
He nodded, obviously confused that Lockon did not appear to know the answer right away. "Yes. Are we supposed to get married?"
"Hehe" he laughed nervously as he scratched the back of his head " Well if by marriage you mean being together forever and belonging to each other. . .well I guess its something like that" he smiled and looked deep into those big red eyes "from now on you and I will be together; we can share moments like this as much as we want, wherever we want, however we want. Remember I once mentioned there are different levels of intimacy? Between lovers its even deeper that the one we've shared so far. We can share everything knowing the other will understand, and that the other will always be there to hold our hand. Something like that I guess. Do you understand?"
"Not completely, but I trust you. I trust this is something I want to experience." Tierial felt the corners of his lips turn up a little, and he found he was looking forward to sharing more moments like this. "We are now labeled as lovers, then?"
"Yes we are" he said softly as a smile decorated his face showing a happiness he hadn't felt in a long time. He kissed Tieria's forehead and smiled "so, are you more clear on things now?"
Tieria couldn't help but copy Lockon's expression, though his was characteristically more subdued. "Affirmative. I appreciate that you answered my questions." He yawned suddenly, and tried it hide it behind a hand.
"You're tired, it was a long day" without breaking their embrace entirely, he laid him gently on his bed, adjusting the pillows so he'd be more comfortable and proceeded to covering him with the sheets as he noticed the room getting colder due to the air conditioning. "You don't mind if we switch beds tonight do you? This way you can get to sleep quicker"
"I would rather we share the same bad. It would be easier to sleep if you were next to me." Tieria admitted, keeping a grip on Lockon's hand to stop him from retreating right away.
"I see" his pale cheeks had a slight red coloring on them as he spoke. He went under the sheets and embraced Tieria in his arms interlacing his hands with his and snuggling his head behind Tieria's. "Are you comfortable like this?" he asked in a soft whisper.
Tieria nodded drowsily, reaching out a free hand to flick the light switch by the bed and killing the lights before setting back down. "This is fine. Goodnight, Lockon."
"Good night, Tieria" he let out a relieved sigh and listened to Tieria's breath as they both feel asleep.
What: Tieria and Lockon discuss their feelings, daaaaw.
Where: Their room at the resort they're staying in during the trip to the Bahamas.
When: July 12th, Saturday night fever,
Why: WE ARE GUNDAM.
The first day at the Bahamas had come to a close, and by the time all of them had decided to retire the hour was fairly late. Tieria had been eager to return to the condo in order to wash off the salt and sand, though he couldn't help but notice with disdain that the smell of the sea still clung to him. Dressed in a large green shirt and pajama bottoms, he continued to towel off his hair as he returned to the room he was sharing with Lockon, relieved to see the other man had not yet retired to bed.
"Lockon." He said to catch his attention, a nervous sort of determination on his face. "Remember when I requested a moment to speak with you? I wish to do so now."
Lockon turned to face Tieria with a warm smile. He noticed a certain determination in his eyes that let him know it was something important. "Yes, I do. Just give me a second while I change." He removed his shirt quickly and turned to the closet to find a new one. "Should I sit or should I stand?" He asked in a calm manner.
"Whatever is most comfortable for you." Tieria replied, taking a seat on one of the two queen sized beds as he removed the towel from his shoulders, folding it neatly and laying it on his lap. He smoothed his hair out while he waited for Lockon to finish changing.
Lockon slipped into his shirt and stretched a little before sitting on the bed facing Tieria. "Alright I think we're all set" he smiled gently "Go ahead, I'm all ears."
He took one look at Lockon's face before shifting his gaze away, suddenly at a loss for words. "I- I think-" A tinge of red stained his cheeks as Tieria stopped, frustrated at himself. He tooks a deep breathe before stubbornly continuing on. "I believe I am experience feelings for you. That are.. romantic in nature."
Lockon looked at him with a puzzled expression on his face; had he really just hear Tieria confess? He blinked a few times, looked around the room, took a few deep breaths and realized that he in fact was not hallucinating. He thought his words carefully knowing that whatever he said could easily be misinterpreted by Tieria's clueless nature. He approached Tieria's bed, lowering himself so their eyes could be at the same level- "So you're saying. . .you're in love with me?" he smiled gently yet again.
During the pause Tieria felt his heartbeat speed up, staying perfectly still as if afraid the slightest movement would alter the inevitable response. At the sound of shifting clothes, he dared to glance back, only to find Lockon in front of him. "I am not sure. I spoke with Hisoka-san, about having strong feelings. About different kinds of love. What he described sounded like the symptoms I experience around you."
"I see" He gently placed his hand on Tieria's now reddening white cheek "what sort of symptoms are these?"
"Elevated heart rate, shortness of breathe, lightheaded." He listed off clinically, his tone becoming a little hesitant at the touch of Lockon's hand. "He said, 'your life wouldn't make sense without that other person.' When you died, it was worse than when Veda had abandoned me."
"That sounds about right" he chuckled softly "I apologize once more for what I put you through. . . perhaps it was a selfish choice, I forgot to consider everyone's feelings, especially yours. But now I'm back, and I promise not to ever do it again" his hand caressed his cheek once more "And you know. . .since we're on the subject and all" -he smiled- I have something to tell you as well"
"That there is something on my face? But I just bathed." Tieria guessed with an expression that bordered between confusion and annoyance, mistaking Lockon's actions for brushing something off of his cheek.
"Um no no your face is fine. . ." He noticed the sudden change in his expression and realized that Tieria had once more misinterpreted him. He took Tieria's hand and held it tightly in his own whle looking firmly into his eyes "What I wanted to say was. . .my feelings towards you. . .are the same"
His red eyes widened in disbelief at Lockon's words, and a warmth spread through his chest at the feeling of their clasped hands. "You feel the same." He repeated shyly, unable to look away. "Even though I have proven to be weaker than you, you would still- Are you positive?"
"Weak? I don't believe you're weak, why do you keep saying that?" he chuckled softly "And yes" He held his hand tighter "I'm positive, very positive"
"Because I could not prevent-" His throat suddenly felt thick, as if he had lost his voice, and he found it hard to say the words out loud. Why had it been so much easier to type to others, but not to speak it to the person whom he trusted the most? "You know why, Lockon."
"Tieria. . .I'm sure you would have been able to stop him if he hadn't been a coward and drugged you the way he did. . ." He looked gently in his eyes "You're safe here with me, I promise" he placed his forehead gently against Tieria's and whispered "I won't let you come into harm again, never"
He closed his eyes in a vain attempt to fight back the tears that were forming. Why was he crying when he was here with Lockon, completely safe? He should be happy, especially after confessing and having his feelings returned. "Why are you able to make me feel so much? Why is it so easy to believe you?"
"Hmm" he smiled "I don't know. . .but love is like that, it rarely makes sense and in fact thats whats so wonderful about it" He stepped back a little in order to look into his eyes once more, which he noticed had tears overflowing. He wiped the tears with his finger and gentle caressed his cheek "Thank you for entrusting me with your heart." he smiled
For every tear brushed away a new one seemed to replace it, and Tieria tightened his grip on Lockon's hand. He leaned forward until his head rested against the other's shoulder. "Please take care of it. It is the first one I've had."
"It will be my pleasure" he whispered softly, as he caressed the back of the smaller one's head and held him securely against his body with his other arm. As he listened to the soft sound of Tieria's breathing, he knew that Tieria had finally found some peace after all the things he had went through before.
He curled into the embrace, allowing his silent tears to be absorbed by Lockon's shirt. Hesitantly he raised his own arms and wound them around the other's waist, a comfortable silence coming over them as the minutes passed by.
"It is strange." Tieria spoke after awhile, his voice soft but still audible. "Even though I am happy, I am crying. And even though I am crying, I feel like something bad has left me. I feel lighter."
"Those. . ." he said as he held him tighter "are tears of joy; Its normal to cry when you're happy or sad because they're strong emotions" he continued to caress his head " tears are a way to letting them out when they're too much to handle." He gently rested his head on Tieria's" You see? You're becoming more human without even noticing" he said with a soft chuckle.
"Is that what it is?" Tieria asked rhetorically, trying to compare his feelings against Lockon's explanation. Logically, it didn't make sense, and yet it felt right; before now all his tears had been of frustration and self loathing, but these.. were different. "Emotions do not make much sense, do they? Is that normal? To not understand them so easily?"
"No they never do; you can live a hundred years and never finish understanding them I think. So yes, its a very normal thing, so don't worry about it."
Tieria frowned, growing uncertain. "Then how do you know if you are labeling your feelings correctly? What if this is not love?"
"Um well, you just do. . .I mean what you can never understand is why they are so complex or why a certain someone is worthy of them" he swallowed hoping Tieria wouldn't question those feelings any longer.
He huffed a little at the vague answers, one hand reaching up to wipe away at his face; a good thing he hadn't put his glasses on after his shower or else this position would have been awkward. "It cannot be impossible to decipher them. That is why people enter into relationships, correct? Because they both know they are in love."
Lockon sighed "I meant why you cry when you're sad or happy, emotions like that are difficult to understand. No its not impossible, its just that love is different than all emotions, something inside you just tells you its right. Like that something that made you realize you loved me."
"Ah. This.. feels right. I do not like when others touch me, but when it is you, it is different. It reminds me that you are alive, and that is comforting." Tieria relaxed a little bit more as the tears began to subside, content to listen to Lockon's strong heartbeat. "As long as I am where you are, that is what matters."
Lockon smiled at these last words, and wondered if Tieria could feel his heart beating so fast. "As long as you can smile and I can keep you safe, I will be happy" he whispered softly.
Tieria blinked, taken aback by the simple words that reflecting his feelings so well. "That is what I want for you, as well. Our emotions really are the same." It was a relief to see what he had been told about love in action, their mirrored emotions giving him the proof he needed to be put at ease.
"Thats true. Wanting whats best for the one you love, thats also what love is all about" he gently kissed his head "Are you tired yet by the way?"
"Yes, but I want to clarify one more thing, first." Tieria pulled back enough so that he could look at Lockon, without breaking their hold on each other. "I have completed my mission objective and determined that we have identical feelings for each other. What is the next step? I did not discuss that far with Hisoka-san."
"N-next step?. . .You mean what happens after we are both aware we have feelings for each other? " For some reason Lockon felt nervous at his question but he tried to hide this by showing a relaxed expression on his face.
He nodded, obviously confused that Lockon did not appear to know the answer right away. "Yes. Are we supposed to get married?"
"Hehe" he laughed nervously as he scratched the back of his head " Well if by marriage you mean being together forever and belonging to each other. . .well I guess its something like that" he smiled and looked deep into those big red eyes "from now on you and I will be together; we can share moments like this as much as we want, wherever we want, however we want. Remember I once mentioned there are different levels of intimacy? Between lovers its even deeper that the one we've shared so far. We can share everything knowing the other will understand, and that the other will always be there to hold our hand. Something like that I guess. Do you understand?"
"Not completely, but I trust you. I trust this is something I want to experience." Tierial felt the corners of his lips turn up a little, and he found he was looking forward to sharing more moments like this. "We are now labeled as lovers, then?"
"Yes we are" he said softly as a smile decorated his face showing a happiness he hadn't felt in a long time. He kissed Tieria's forehead and smiled "so, are you more clear on things now?"
Tieria couldn't help but copy Lockon's expression, though his was characteristically more subdued. "Affirmative. I appreciate that you answered my questions." He yawned suddenly, and tried it hide it behind a hand.
"You're tired, it was a long day" without breaking their embrace entirely, he laid him gently on his bed, adjusting the pillows so he'd be more comfortable and proceeded to covering him with the sheets as he noticed the room getting colder due to the air conditioning. "You don't mind if we switch beds tonight do you? This way you can get to sleep quicker"
"I would rather we share the same bad. It would be easier to sleep if you were next to me." Tieria admitted, keeping a grip on Lockon's hand to stop him from retreating right away.
"I see" his pale cheeks had a slight red coloring on them as he spoke. He went under the sheets and embraced Tieria in his arms interlacing his hands with his and snuggling his head behind Tieria's. "Are you comfortable like this?" he asked in a soft whisper.
Tieria nodded drowsily, reaching out a free hand to flick the light switch by the bed and killing the lights before setting back down. "This is fine. Goodnight, Lockon."
"Good night, Tieria" he let out a relieved sigh and listened to Tieria's breath as they both feel asleep.