(no subject)
im feeling especially shitty today.
and i want to cut my body off of me.
i hate everything right now.
and i cant get away from everything.
im hungry but i couldnt possible eat.
and i miss my boo.
<3X45cr5
im about to take like a bath.
i expect there will be many more today.
Someone is trying to tow that silver car in front of my house.
the one that we never drive.
and the licence plate almost says "666" but it says something like "6606".
thats a metaphor for my life. honestly.
and my mom is yelling at them.
alot. i can hear her through the walls.
i think its my Volvo actually.
another metaphor for my life.
this just keeps coming.
now my hillbilly neighbor is out there.
man i hate it when people tow others people cars for no reason.
i would never stick my nose into others peoples business.
jezze. you know what im talking about right.
stupid people with nothing better to do.
stupid people.
i love my friends because they are the only not stupid people i know.
i think all my friends are beautiful and amazing.
otherwize i would not be their friend
because i only socoilize with people who are beautiful and amazing.
so if your my friend your probally beautiful and or amazing.
that factor has been 85% true in the past.
and now i have cut the cancer off and its 100%. i think.
and i mean cancer. because im not being too dramatic. trust me.
i think i am and also i think i am stupid in that way.
i need to be a better person.
anyways its 100% true now.
exept for this one girl. shes a bitch.
but i supposes she could be categorized as beautiful and or amazing also.
its just very interesting. also complicated.
people cant be categorized.
my brother is a stupid boy. he dosent know what buses to take and also he refused to learn how to drive deispite the fact that hes 19 (on november 15). i think that he should of been to a strip club because thats one of the first things i would do (but i dont want to think about that). i think he should take showers more often . and brush his teeth more often because thats disgusting. also i think he is fat and he shouldn’t eat like he does. i can see him getting a heart attack very soon. hes the reason i think i dont eat meat. its gross. and the mental picture i have is unbearable. i think my brother is a very unlikable person. i love him. but he is unlikeable and i think he will probally be harder for you if you are unlikeable (in the world). also if you are a girl with a deep voice, instead of a deep throat. You’ll have a hard time in life too. so watch out.
my mother is under alot of stress i can tell in her voice.
and i can tell she likes it when i pitty her.
im probably spoiled i know this. i dont want much though. its not like i go shopping and spend a million dollars. but i think im spoiled. or i think they are tired. i think they are tired of fighting with me because my arguments are always better then theirs. i have a hypothesis and a conclusion and their areguement is "because" more my mom than my dad. my dads chill when he wants to be i suppose. i suppose my life would be alot easier if it where me and my father. but then i would miss the other two for some reason. and that wouldn’t be good. im not sure if i want to move away from y family for collage. i never want my boo to move away from me. i miss him after not seeing him for two days. also im pretty sure he failed me again today. my standards are pretty high. but he could at least be on time when i tell him to pick me up.
i cant see i havent got my glasses on.
i cant go eat sushi today again. i meant i haven’t got any cash. i need to go shopping for clothing. i should make ricky a copy of the house key so he could let himself in because this is frustrating when i have to get up from when im doing (sleeping, watching D.O.O.L., baking) and open the door for him. also i think i might be feeling better. so the fact that i sont feel as much like shit i still look like shit and im still hungry.
i love Kelly Clarkson. i think she is an exceptionally talented pop star. i also like britney speres, just cuz shes well produced. not all the time though. but i do think shes naked most of the time. also shes fat pregnant now. which i think is funny, because it britney speres, the proverbial antichrist.
if you found out i wrote a book would you buy it? YES/NO
okay go. i think im very very vein. but i only show it to people im comfortable with being vein. but i would all like you to know im a very vein person. It’s a very different vein but its still there. my definition of beauty is: salma skin and tiny boobs. if i had these two things i don’t know what i would do.(interruption)
i fucking hate telemarketer.
is vein a double standard? if a supermodel claimed to love herself would you consider her vein?? are these people supposed to loath themselfs? because thats the stupidest thing in the world. and if i fat girl claims to love her self you think: awe just keep telling yourself your beautiful and it will all be okay. because you know shes fat. and you feel bad. and such. poor supermodels are victimized in this way.
anyways. is being over proud of yourself bad? i do little things and i feel so proud. that other people would look over. i am so happy im me. and i love myself i supposed to a certain extent(except i don’t have salma skin or tiny boobs)but i think i love myself too much. its a pretty scary thought. ive never felt like this. i think the people around me have turned me into a monster. im pretty self aware of these types of things. im a bad person and i should change. i probally should change and i will make some effort i suppose.
no promises.
i have so many things im looking forward to. sooo many and im afraid ive been waiting all my life for that will never come. i feel like im very very close, but not there. i feel like the deadline is being pulled back as i get closer to the finish line. i don’t want to tell you my goals
a) because they are silly
b) because they are girly and stupid
c) because they are private
that’s redundant because all of this information is very private and i would not feel comfortable saying it otherwise.
i think im going to write a book. one day. when im good enough. i cant possible imagine publishing a book at it being any good when im 18. because i can see it going no where and me being very disappointed. then again i really don’t see this going anywhere at all i feel as if im running in circles. i blame myself really. everything is my fault. and i love it.
i love myself so much. i love my life. i don’t want to stop loving myself. i think it will change when i go back to school. i have make a good argument about going into home studies with my mother. and i think she has accepted it. even though she keeps telling me its for mental retards and people who live in the jungle like eliza thornberry. i wish i was a indigenous native Brazilian. they have it so easy. and they have awesome hair cuts.
and i want to cut my body off of me.
i hate everything right now.
and i cant get away from everything.
im hungry but i couldnt possible eat.
and i miss my boo.
<3X45cr5
im about to take like a bath.
i expect there will be many more today.
Someone is trying to tow that silver car in front of my house.
the one that we never drive.
and the licence plate almost says "666" but it says something like "6606".
thats a metaphor for my life. honestly.
and my mom is yelling at them.
alot. i can hear her through the walls.
i think its my Volvo actually.
another metaphor for my life.
this just keeps coming.
now my hillbilly neighbor is out there.
man i hate it when people tow others people cars for no reason.
i would never stick my nose into others peoples business.
jezze. you know what im talking about right.
stupid people with nothing better to do.
stupid people.
i love my friends because they are the only not stupid people i know.
i think all my friends are beautiful and amazing.
otherwize i would not be their friend
because i only socoilize with people who are beautiful and amazing.
so if your my friend your probally beautiful and or amazing.
that factor has been 85% true in the past.
and now i have cut the cancer off and its 100%. i think.
and i mean cancer. because im not being too dramatic. trust me.
i think i am and also i think i am stupid in that way.
i need to be a better person.
anyways its 100% true now.
exept for this one girl. shes a bitch.
but i supposes she could be categorized as beautiful and or amazing also.
its just very interesting. also complicated.
people cant be categorized.
my brother is a stupid boy. he dosent know what buses to take and also he refused to learn how to drive deispite the fact that hes 19 (on november 15). i think that he should of been to a strip club because thats one of the first things i would do (but i dont want to think about that). i think he should take showers more often . and brush his teeth more often because thats disgusting. also i think he is fat and he shouldn’t eat like he does. i can see him getting a heart attack very soon. hes the reason i think i dont eat meat. its gross. and the mental picture i have is unbearable. i think my brother is a very unlikable person. i love him. but he is unlikeable and i think he will probally be harder for you if you are unlikeable (in the world). also if you are a girl with a deep voice, instead of a deep throat. You’ll have a hard time in life too. so watch out.
my mother is under alot of stress i can tell in her voice.
and i can tell she likes it when i pitty her.
im probably spoiled i know this. i dont want much though. its not like i go shopping and spend a million dollars. but i think im spoiled. or i think they are tired. i think they are tired of fighting with me because my arguments are always better then theirs. i have a hypothesis and a conclusion and their areguement is "because" more my mom than my dad. my dads chill when he wants to be i suppose. i suppose my life would be alot easier if it where me and my father. but then i would miss the other two for some reason. and that wouldn’t be good. im not sure if i want to move away from y family for collage. i never want my boo to move away from me. i miss him after not seeing him for two days. also im pretty sure he failed me again today. my standards are pretty high. but he could at least be on time when i tell him to pick me up.
i cant see i havent got my glasses on.
i cant go eat sushi today again. i meant i haven’t got any cash. i need to go shopping for clothing. i should make ricky a copy of the house key so he could let himself in because this is frustrating when i have to get up from when im doing (sleeping, watching D.O.O.L., baking) and open the door for him. also i think i might be feeling better. so the fact that i sont feel as much like shit i still look like shit and im still hungry.
i love Kelly Clarkson. i think she is an exceptionally talented pop star. i also like britney speres, just cuz shes well produced. not all the time though. but i do think shes naked most of the time. also shes fat pregnant now. which i think is funny, because it britney speres, the proverbial antichrist.
if you found out i wrote a book would you buy it? YES/NO
okay go. i think im very very vein. but i only show it to people im comfortable with being vein. but i would all like you to know im a very vein person. It’s a very different vein but its still there. my definition of beauty is: salma skin and tiny boobs. if i had these two things i don’t know what i would do.(interruption)
i fucking hate telemarketer.
is vein a double standard? if a supermodel claimed to love herself would you consider her vein?? are these people supposed to loath themselfs? because thats the stupidest thing in the world. and if i fat girl claims to love her self you think: awe just keep telling yourself your beautiful and it will all be okay. because you know shes fat. and you feel bad. and such. poor supermodels are victimized in this way.
anyways. is being over proud of yourself bad? i do little things and i feel so proud. that other people would look over. i am so happy im me. and i love myself i supposed to a certain extent(except i don’t have salma skin or tiny boobs)but i think i love myself too much. its a pretty scary thought. ive never felt like this. i think the people around me have turned me into a monster. im pretty self aware of these types of things. im a bad person and i should change. i probally should change and i will make some effort i suppose.
no promises.
i have so many things im looking forward to. sooo many and im afraid ive been waiting all my life for that will never come. i feel like im very very close, but not there. i feel like the deadline is being pulled back as i get closer to the finish line. i don’t want to tell you my goals
a) because they are silly
b) because they are girly and stupid
c) because they are private
that’s redundant because all of this information is very private and i would not feel comfortable saying it otherwise.
i think im going to write a book. one day. when im good enough. i cant possible imagine publishing a book at it being any good when im 18. because i can see it going no where and me being very disappointed. then again i really don’t see this going anywhere at all i feel as if im running in circles. i blame myself really. everything is my fault. and i love it.
i love myself so much. i love my life. i don’t want to stop loving myself. i think it will change when i go back to school. i have make a good argument about going into home studies with my mother. and i think she has accepted it. even though she keeps telling me its for mental retards and people who live in the jungle like eliza thornberry. i wish i was a indigenous native Brazilian. they have it so easy. and they have awesome hair cuts.