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I don't know if anyone still comes to look at my journal, but if you are still there...
Sorry I've disappeared abruptly, and gone for long. My RL got complicated and still remains so, though things are slowly but surely improving lately. Back when things started to go downward in RL, drawing HP fanart and translating HP fanfics were what kept me up and going. But it became harder and harder to keep up on both of them, along with the total freak-out of "OMG HP is gonna be over soon! What do I do??"
Then it seems that reading the final HP book, finally cut off my tension.
I enjoyed the book, I was reasonably happy with the ending, but after finishing it, suddenly this mixed feeling of loss and relief washed me...like "My job here is over."
Since then, I haven't, practically drawn anything at all. Not just only HP, but I lost the urge to draw anything.
I guess I've always been that way...I always needed the subject I'm deeply interested in & the strong urge to express something with it, to motivate myself to pick up a pencil. And that kind of urge don't come to me very often. It's not unusual I'd have an entire year not drawing anything at all. Then my Holy Grail, Harry Potter came with the loud *BANG!*
I was cutting my sleeping hours drawing & creating site & reading fics & translating them...I was so energized and so, so happy. Such unbelievable drive HP has given me! I was flying high with joy, it was like Harry getting his first broom! I can honestly say, nothing else has ever had such strong effect on me.
Maybe I need time to rest now. Maybe once RL things are settled, I may again feel like drawing my dear Harry...and Snape and Sirius and Remus and Draco and, and...
I miss them and I miss you guys. I can't express enough gratitude to HP fandom, for all the support you've given me.
I've been putting off writing this entry because I didn't want to say this, but...for now, I must say a farewell.
Thank you so much and I love you all, those were the unforgettable, fantastic years I shared with you.
Yukipon
* I'll be posting a pile of my unused HP (and some non-HP) sketches I found. After that, there probably won't be any more posts here.
* I still love HP. Of course. I'll always go see HP film the first day, stare at Snape and Harry with the dreamy eyes. And I'm not interested in moving to another fandom.
* Perfect Drug and Blood+Sugar+Sex+Magik will remain opened for at least another two years, though there won't be any more updates.
* Due to spam-hell, my email address "xbssm at yahoo.co.jp" will be closed but you can still reach me at the new address "xbssm.mail @ gmail.com"