(no subject)
Why does he have to go now? Or at all? I know it's selfish of me. I know he really wants to go and that it's a wonderful business prospect and that really we aren't all that serious -
(are we? I have a key for his place, but he hasn't told me he loves me - looking back, I've told him I loved him - which I do - but I was heavily concussed. I wouldn't actually say it to him first in full consciousness. I mean... Juan never told me he loved me. I didn't realize it until I found out about his little German girl, oddly enough. But Sengoku's so much warmer than he ever was, and so much sweeter, but that's his nature, isn't it? He's the type for whirlwind romances, and he'll probably grow tired of me in a month or two.)
- but does he really have to go? Really? He's going to find some gorgeous young Indian girl with dark skin and big beautiful brown eyes and fall hard for her, and my archetype for 'treacherous bitch' will be 'little Indian girl' instead of 'little German girl.' If he's going once a month for an entire week he could keep both of us going for years. I don't think I could cope with being played like that again. It hurt so badly last time that I couldn't look at another man for years.
He wouldn't, though, would he? He'd finish with me. He's at least honest.
... But tampering with Kirihara's head has given me a reputation. He'd be scared to. Between Syuusuke and I, I could understand why he wouldn't dare. (Not Yuuta. Yuuta doesn't want to know me anymore. Perhaps it's pettiness. Perhaps it's Mizuki. I don't know, but I've exhausted my tears over him. I can't cry anymore. I haven't got any moisture left in me for it.)
I can't stick around. Sengoku going, and Yuuta ignoring me, and Syuusuke busy (which I'm glad of. I want him to be happy, even if he never settles down) and the emails have turned to letters (how could he even get my address?) I just... I'm going to lose my cool, and someone's going to see far more of my emotions than I ever want them to...
Sengoku-san, I'm going to see you off at the airport, okay? ^_^
Everyone else, I'll be going to stay with my parents once I've seen Sengoku-san off. are under this cut, and Lucky and Jinx will be coming with me, since it's not that far. Please take care of yourselves <3
(are we? I have a key for his place, but he hasn't told me he loves me - looking back, I've told him I loved him - which I do - but I was heavily concussed. I wouldn't actually say it to him first in full consciousness. I mean... Juan never told me he loved me. I didn't realize it until I found out about his little German girl, oddly enough. But Sengoku's so much warmer than he ever was, and so much sweeter, but that's his nature, isn't it? He's the type for whirlwind romances, and he'll probably grow tired of me in a month or two.)
- but does he really have to go? Really? He's going to find some gorgeous young Indian girl with dark skin and big beautiful brown eyes and fall hard for her, and my archetype for 'treacherous bitch' will be 'little Indian girl' instead of 'little German girl.' If he's going once a month for an entire week he could keep both of us going for years. I don't think I could cope with being played like that again. It hurt so badly last time that I couldn't look at another man for years.
He wouldn't, though, would he? He'd finish with me. He's at least honest.
... But tampering with Kirihara's head has given me a reputation. He'd be scared to. Between Syuusuke and I, I could understand why he wouldn't dare. (Not Yuuta. Yuuta doesn't want to know me anymore. Perhaps it's pettiness. Perhaps it's Mizuki. I don't know, but I've exhausted my tears over him. I can't cry anymore. I haven't got any moisture left in me for it.)
I can't stick around. Sengoku going, and Yuuta ignoring me, and Syuusuke busy (which I'm glad of. I want him to be happy, even if he never settles down) and the emails have turned to letters (how could he even get my address?) I just... I'm going to lose my cool, and someone's going to see far more of my emotions than I ever want them to...
Sengoku-san, I'm going to see you off at the airport, okay? ^_^
Everyone else, I'll be going to stay with my parents once I've seen Sengoku-san off. are under this cut, and Lucky and Jinx will be coming with me, since it's not that far. Please take care of yourselves <3