Man's Lost Head Comes Out of Hiding
- Edwin Cheung, AP
The missing head of 46-year-old Kevin Grady was discovered in a barn 25 miles outside of Morristown, Tennessee late Tuesday afternoon. Grady's head had disappeared on April 14th of this year. When questioned why his head would have left without any warning, Grady's body simply gesticulated wildly. Attempts to understand the body's movements were unsuccessful, while written explanations were simply too difficult to read. Marian Grady, wife to Kevin, claims, "I warned him not to let his mind wander, lest his head would follow in suit."
Officer Michael O'Bannon of the Tennessee Highway Patrol discovered the head at approximately 5:50PM. "I heard an awful commotion coming from (the barn) as I was headed back to my cruiser after issuing a citation for a speeding violation," states O'Bannon, "and I decided to check it out. Lo and behold, there was a man's head, drunker than I've ever seen anyone before. I was confused. A little scared, even. (The head) kept shouting and cursing about freedom, oppression, and some downright disrespectful things about the president. I had to subdue him before I could set him in the cruiser." Grady's head would not comment on his upcoming court appearance, though he did say that he "never want(s) to be attached to that... body again."
Upon hearing the head's decision, Grady's body simply shrugged. Marian says that though she will miss the head, she respects its decision to do what is best for it. "Kevin's head has been a part of my life for just as long as the rest of him, so I hate to see it go. I just don't know how the divorce process will go."