TZC: On His Knees (28 Zanpakutou)
Byakuya Kuchiki was far from weak, and Senbonzakura was a daily witness to this. He watched Byakuya draw from a well of strength that at times seemed bottomless. No matter how bad the situation, no matter how deeply he was forced to draw, this well never ran out.
Until now.
Though he seemed fine on the outside, Senbonzakura could see the truth. Hisana’s death had broken Byakuya in a way no enemy ever could. Inside, the wind in his inner world had stilled, the once vibrantly blooming sakura trees were nothing more than dead, twisted shadows of their former glory and the grass beneath them had turned a sickly shade of brown. Inside, Byakuya was dying. At this rate, even if his body continued to function, his spirit would not survive much longer. Senbonzakura looked around his home and came to a decision.
Enough is enough. Whether or not he chooses it is immaterial. I refuse to let my shinigami die.
Like flipping a switch, the balance of power in Byakuya’s inner world shifted, and Senbonzakura was in control. He closed his eyes and tapped the power-his power, now that he had let go of his leash-then reached out to change his world back. A pulse of energy spread out from Senbonzakura’s position like a wave, and new life followed after it. The grass turned lush and green. The trees stood straighter and their leaves returned in an explosion of green. The wind began to blow and, as if on cue, all the sakura trees burst into bloom at once.
It did not go unnoticed. No sooner had Senbonzakura finished revitalizing his home when Byakuya’s angry voice rang out in front of him.
What do you think you’re doing?!
Senbonzakura opened his eyes, but remained silent and still. Byakuya looked absolutely haggard. His hair was stringy and limp, his eyes sunk into his face, and his skin was pallid. Senbonzakura had looked out of Byakuya’s eyes into a mirror and knew that, save for a tense expression and dark circles under his eyes, he looked more or less normal, as decorum demanded. But his spiritual form…it was not the body of a man prepared to live, but of a walking corpse. Senbonzakura waited until he saw a spark of anger in his shinigami’s eyes, saw him open his mouth for another angry remonstrance before he, himself spoke.
It has been a long time, Byakuya. Once again, you must be the student and I, the teacher.
What?!
Judging from the suddenly furious expression on his face, Byakuya did not miss the change in Senbonzakura’s demeanor or the lack of his usual terms of respect. Senbonzakura didn’t back down. His eyes hardened as he continued, ignoring his shinigami’s outburst.
This time I will not teach you about my power, but about yourself. I will tell you of the Byakuya Kuchiki you have forgotten.
You-
Listen. This, too, is something you must learn.
Byakuya fell silent. Senbonzakura nodded once, then continued. He kept his own anger tightly leashed. This was not about anger. This was about connection, and truth.
Before you were Hisana’s husband, you were a shinigami. Before you were a shinigami, you were a Kuchiki. But before you were a Kuchiki, before you were a shinigami, before you were a husband, before you were even born, you were mine. After all these things fall away, you will still be mine. My shinigami. I will never release you from that obligation, and I will never forsake you.
Now Senbonzakura moved, coming to within a few scant inches of his shinigami before again falling into stillness. Byakuya stared at him, eyes wide with shock, and Senbonzakura met his gaze squarely. He still had one more thing to say, and he didn’t dare shrink from it.
Your life is my life, Byakuya. I will not let you end it.
Senbonzakura reached out and put his hand on his shinigami’s shoulder, feeling the power of their connection through the palm of his hand. His voice dropped to a near-whisper, turning almost pleading despite his resolve to stay firm.
Let me walk with you. Together, we can see the other side of this.
Byakuya did not burst into tears. He did not start blubbering and sobbing like a child. He was not weak. But he wasn’t strong enough to bear up under this tragedy alone. He fell to his knees, and Senbonzakura went with him. Byakuya didn’t resist when Senbonzakura pulled him into his arms. He never said another word, just leaned against his zanpakutou and shook.
Senbonzakura held him up.