(no subject)
Dark of the Moon Impressions:
My eyes are happy.
My ass is numb and somehow also sore from sitting for three hours.
My brain is blitzed and numb and weeping.
Yeah, I pretty much just saw a Michael Bay movie.
HEY. YOU. THE GUYS RIPPING OFF THE ULTIMATE DOOM EPISODE. WHY YOU DO THAT.
I
YOU
YOU DID
THIS
THING
BRINGING AN ENTIRE PLANET
EARTH'S ORBIT
NOTHING ON EARTH AFFECTED
LIKE, AT ALL
also, is Michael Bay telling all of his actors totalkatthispacebecauseGODDAMNifIcouldunderstandHALFtheshitthatwassaidohmygodohmygodOHMYGODOHMYGODNOOOOOOOOOOPTIMUS
Seriously, what was the point of Sam yelling Optimus's name all the time? It's not like he even needed his help at those moments, it was just yelling as if the audience was going to forget his name or something.
They probably should have had Sam yell at the new Autobots too, and some of the old ones to get THEIR names cleared up.
Barring the total stupidity of enslaving a squishy, tiny, biologically incompatible race
barring the total stupidity of smashing two planets together and expecting that race to survive or like, anything to survive, really
Why was a human able to restart the control pillar if Sentinel Prime was the only one who could do it
Why did Megatron decide that it'd be a good idea to shiv the only one who could do it before the plan was finished
Who the hell was that Shockwave guy? I'm not asking as in "Shockwave, I've never heard of that character in Transformers", I'm asking as in "uhhh so what was the point of him exactly"
Why is everyone DROOLING in this movie?
General complaints:
- Less slow pan shots of the sexy girlfriend, I get that she's sexy, at least she was kinda useful, but seriously, come on
- Hey did you know there's GIRLS in the real military? It would be totally cool to see some.
Wait that would step outside the "girls exist to be hot or amusing" Bay rule.
My eyes are happy.
My ass is numb and somehow also sore from sitting for three hours.
My brain is blitzed and numb and weeping.
Yeah, I pretty much just saw a Michael Bay movie.
HEY. YOU. THE GUYS RIPPING OFF THE ULTIMATE DOOM EPISODE. WHY YOU DO THAT.
I
YOU
YOU DID
THIS
THING
BRINGING AN ENTIRE PLANET
EARTH'S ORBIT
NOTHING ON EARTH AFFECTED
LIKE, AT ALL
also, is Michael Bay telling all of his actors totalkatthispacebecauseGODDAMNifIcouldunderstandHALFtheshitthatwassaidohmygodohmygodOHMYGODOHMYGODNOOOOOOOOOOPTIMUS
Seriously, what was the point of Sam yelling Optimus's name all the time? It's not like he even needed his help at those moments, it was just yelling as if the audience was going to forget his name or something.
They probably should have had Sam yell at the new Autobots too, and some of the old ones to get THEIR names cleared up.
Barring the total stupidity of enslaving a squishy, tiny, biologically incompatible race
barring the total stupidity of smashing two planets together and expecting that race to survive or like, anything to survive, really
Why was a human able to restart the control pillar if Sentinel Prime was the only one who could do it
Why did Megatron decide that it'd be a good idea to shiv the only one who could do it before the plan was finished
Who the hell was that Shockwave guy? I'm not asking as in "Shockwave, I've never heard of that character in Transformers", I'm asking as in "uhhh so what was the point of him exactly"
Why is everyone DROOLING in this movie?
General complaints:
- Less slow pan shots of the sexy girlfriend, I get that she's sexy, at least she was kinda useful, but seriously, come on
- Hey did you know there's GIRLS in the real military? It would be totally cool to see some.
Wait that would step outside the "girls exist to be hot or amusing" Bay rule.