Top reasons why Jim and Bones might want a threesome with:
I was looking at bits of half-written fic on my harddrive, wondering if I'll ever write another fanfic.... I'm not sure about that, but I found this little bit that seems to stand on its own.
Christopher Pike:
As Jim (and Bones) would say: well hell, who wouldn’t? Have you seen the man?
And besides, Jim has thought him smoking hot ever since that whistling thing in the bar, and really fancies himself topping Pike, although Bones says there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of that ever happening.
Bones thinks that - just sometimes - Jim can be an annoying ass, and Bones has tried to rein him in with a bit of discipline but the trouble is Jim enjoys being spanked way to much for it to have much impact. But Bones thinks that Jim is secretly just a bit in awe of Pike and if there is a man who could effectively administer a swift spanking to Captain Kirk, it would be Admiral Pike and Bones really wants to get to watch that.
Spock:
As Jim would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
And besides, there’s that famous friendship he’s supposed to be cultivating and Jim’s always managed to make friends in bed. And then there’s the way that Spock Prime always looks slightly puzzled by the presence of Uhura and Bones, and while Jim is never, ever giving up his Bones, he hates to think that his self in another dimension is getting some that’s he’s not getting here at home.
Bones is a bit undecided - he’s not quite forgiven the whole strangling thing, or the monster-filled ice planet bit - but he’s got his eye on that famous friendship thing and Jim’s damned well not getting off with Spock without him, and, well, hell, the man is easy on the eye, even he can’t deny that.
Uhura:
As Bones would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
Have you seen the legs on that woman? He was married, after all, and he does enjoy a good-looking woman with attitude.
Jim just wants a chance to get Uhura to moan his name in bed while admiring his sexual prowess and Bones thinks there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of that happening, but rather fancies Nyota pegging Jim and he really wants to get to watch that.
Sulu:
As Jim would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
Sulu’s got a bit of a hero-worship thing going on after Jim jumped after him on Vulcan and Jim does feel that such admiration should be generously rewarded. And beside, the way the man waves a sword around - Jim’s checked out the package and doesn’t think he’s compensating for anything, so he’s probably a fucking master in bed.
And Bones may bitch about what a stereotype it is but he’s not above admiring a bit of manly martial arts himself.
Chekov:
Bones would rather they didn’t because, hell, he’s just a kid, but Jim got two eyes and knows a good-looking kid when he sees one, and if Pavel’s good enough to be navigator on the flagship, he deserves to have some fun too.
Scotty:
Scotty’s the one man who really loves the Enterprise the way Jim does and Jim rather fancies a foursome down by the plasma cooling tanks with his Bones and Scotty and the Enterprise humming along with them. Now Bones can’t understand having sex with a damn ship, but he sure admires what Scotty can do with that still he’s got tucked away behind the plasma cooling tanks, and he’s happy to have a foursome with Jim, Scotty and a damn fine bottle of moonshine.
Christopher Pike:
As Jim (and Bones) would say: well hell, who wouldn’t? Have you seen the man?
And besides, Jim has thought him smoking hot ever since that whistling thing in the bar, and really fancies himself topping Pike, although Bones says there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of that ever happening.
Bones thinks that - just sometimes - Jim can be an annoying ass, and Bones has tried to rein him in with a bit of discipline but the trouble is Jim enjoys being spanked way to much for it to have much impact. But Bones thinks that Jim is secretly just a bit in awe of Pike and if there is a man who could effectively administer a swift spanking to Captain Kirk, it would be Admiral Pike and Bones really wants to get to watch that.
Spock:
As Jim would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
And besides, there’s that famous friendship he’s supposed to be cultivating and Jim’s always managed to make friends in bed. And then there’s the way that Spock Prime always looks slightly puzzled by the presence of Uhura and Bones, and while Jim is never, ever giving up his Bones, he hates to think that his self in another dimension is getting some that’s he’s not getting here at home.
Bones is a bit undecided - he’s not quite forgiven the whole strangling thing, or the monster-filled ice planet bit - but he’s got his eye on that famous friendship thing and Jim’s damned well not getting off with Spock without him, and, well, hell, the man is easy on the eye, even he can’t deny that.
Uhura:
As Bones would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
Have you seen the legs on that woman? He was married, after all, and he does enjoy a good-looking woman with attitude.
Jim just wants a chance to get Uhura to moan his name in bed while admiring his sexual prowess and Bones thinks there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of that happening, but rather fancies Nyota pegging Jim and he really wants to get to watch that.
Sulu:
As Jim would say: well hell, who wouldn’t?
Sulu’s got a bit of a hero-worship thing going on after Jim jumped after him on Vulcan and Jim does feel that such admiration should be generously rewarded. And beside, the way the man waves a sword around - Jim’s checked out the package and doesn’t think he’s compensating for anything, so he’s probably a fucking master in bed.
And Bones may bitch about what a stereotype it is but he’s not above admiring a bit of manly martial arts himself.
Chekov:
Bones would rather they didn’t because, hell, he’s just a kid, but Jim got two eyes and knows a good-looking kid when he sees one, and if Pavel’s good enough to be navigator on the flagship, he deserves to have some fun too.
Scotty:
Scotty’s the one man who really loves the Enterprise the way Jim does and Jim rather fancies a foursome down by the plasma cooling tanks with his Bones and Scotty and the Enterprise humming along with them. Now Bones can’t understand having sex with a damn ship, but he sure admires what Scotty can do with that still he’s got tucked away behind the plasma cooling tanks, and he’s happy to have a foursome with Jim, Scotty and a damn fine bottle of moonshine.