Slash: "How do you feel about me?" (Aiji/Maya)
"How do you feel about me?" (PG)
Written by ZB24
Aiji had asked me one day, "How to you feel about me, Maya?" I stuttered and said honestly, "I don't know."
Whenever I was around him I became confused. Most times it was as if we were just friends; just two teenage boys goofing around. But sometimes, I wished we could be more than friends... and that feeling scared me because I'd never felt it with anyone else but Aiji.
Our relationship was unusually close by societal standards, but I didn't think of it that way. My Mother didn't like Aiji and made a point of telling me about it whenever she had the chance. "Something's not right about that boy!" "You should stay away from him." "He's not good for you." Because of this, I had to stop inviting Aiji over to my house. Whenever we wanted to practice guitar together or see each other outside of school, I had to walk over to his house, which was a few blocks away.
Ever since he asked me that simple question, I couldn't get it out of my head. I felt he still wanted an answer and I tried my best to figure it out over the next couple of weeks as we went through our lives together. It just so happened that I could find no other way to explain why everytime Aiji smiled at me I felt my stomach turning over. I couldn't find any other way to explain why just being near him made my heart rate increase.
Aiji was a few years older than me; he was more confident about himself and also about his guitar playing. I looked up to him for those things. Most of our time spent together was over our guitars as he took the time to correct and teach me.
One of those days I tried to focus on my homework, but everytime I tried to focus on the pages I saw Aiji's face. I couldn't think about anything else, so I decided to go and see him. My mother asked me where I was going and gave me some flack about it, but I just nodded like a good boy and then went anyway.
His dad answered the door and told me that Aiji had locked himself in the basement again and was working on a song. I just said hello and chuckled as I was let into the house. I walked softly to the basement door and considered knocking but didn't want to interrupt his "flow", so I just let myself in and stood quietly until he was finished.
"Aiji..." I called out his name finally.
He flinched out of surprise but then smiled. "Maya, I wasn't expecting you today..."
"I know and I'm sorry. I didn't think to call. Hopefully you don't mind?" I was twisting my hands nervously. I noticed and shoved them into my pockets.
"No, I don't mind. Hey, do you think you could play this part for me?"
I gave him a look that must have told him I didn't feel worthy.
"It's just the backing rythmn, but it doesn't sound right when I try recording them separately and then overlapping them."
"I could try." I offered weakly.
Aiji handed me his guitar, which I didn't even feel worthy to touch, and I attempted to play the piece. I only got through the first few seconds before he started gesturing me to stop.
"Was is that bad?!" I pouted, expecting the worst.
"No, it was fine but you can't play this guitar like yours."
He moved to stand behind me and placed his hands over mine which were still on the guitar... He was so close I could feel and hear his breath on my ear.
"You should strum it here..."
This could have been seen as mere tutoring, but it didn't feel that way to me, the way it was affecting my whole body.
"Do you hear the difference?"
"Y-yeah."
"Now try it and let's see." he said as he backed away (finally).
I would have tried it, but my hands began to shake as soon as he let go of them. I took a shaky breath and moved to place Aiji's guitar safely back on it's stand before standing up. Aiji was looking at me in a strange way, but I had to say this now or I'd never have any peace.
"A-Aiji?"
"Yeah?"
"Y-you remember how you asked me how I f-f-felt about you?" It was crazy how he affected me this badly...
"Yes, I do. You never answered."
"Well, I've been th-thinking about it and...." It was starting again, "and.... ah..." Where my stuttering and anxiousness got so bad I couldn't even speak.
Aiji almost looked as if he was worried about me the way his brow was furrowed. He almost looked concerned about me. He made a short trip accross the room to me and took my shaking hands in his. I couln't help but think it was as if he was trying to keep me from fluttering away.
"Maya, what is it?"
"Aiji, I--"
I could feel my lips quaving and I thought it would be really bad if I started to cry right now.
"I love you Aiji!" I blurted out. "Like, more than a friend!"
I looked away ashamed. I felt like I would die if Aiji hated me for this. I soon felt his hand in my hair.
"You're not the only one who feels that way Maya. I've always felt that way about you."
I looked at him finally and muttered "Really?"
"Yeah..." He smiled at me a little bit.
I noticed he was beginning to move his face towards mine and as apparant as it was, I couldn't belive that Aiji wanted to kiss me. He seemed to be looking for some indiaction that I didn't want this and was going to run away from him, but I remained unmoving.
When his lips fiinally met mine, so soft and warm, I felt as if my body was tingling all over and I couldn't breathe. I unconsciously moved my lips back against his and brought my hands up to his back.
I was so sad when the kiss ended, but something told me that wasn't the last time I would feel Aiji so closely.
He pulled me into a warm, tight hug and I just smiled like an idiot.
"I love you too, Maya." I heard him say into my hair.
The song, our lives, and our parents could wait. Time just stopped when we were in each other's arms and that was just how we wanted it to be.
A/N: First slash ever! Comment if you like! (^_^)
For the record, I really don't think Maya or Aiji is gay but it was fun to write them. Hehe~