Comment Porn Day \0/

[zelda_zee]

I lifted this wholesale from themoononstick's journal, cuz she puts it all so well.

Comment Porn Day!
ETA: Okay, no more! I've probably got more than I can do anyway!

The idea is a simple one

1. Give me a pairing (or character, or the name of a show) and a prompt (a word, a phrase, a situation, an emotion, a few lines from a song or, hell, even an entire song

Comments

[thespiansparkle]

If the muse will let you...

Sayid/Desmond, "repayment"

*squeeze* Your constant and my constant!

[zelda_zee]

“I think I owe you, brother,” Desmond says. This is after the first night they're confined on the boat, and the first morning when no one comes to check on them and things are looking pretty grim and the room is starting to take on the feel of an oubliette

[zelda_zee]

Desmond doesn’t seem to have any hesitation about what they’re doing, in fact he seems to be quite enthusiastic about it from the satisfied sound he makes when he pulls out Sayid’s cock and the quiet moan he makes when he takes it in his mouth and the louder one when Sayid gets fully hard as Desmond’s tongue works up and down his length. Sayid thrusts shallowly, just to see if it’s okay and Desmond looks up at him, and it’s almost too much, because he looks, he looks, ohhh, he looks good like that, he looks like a vision - debauched, beautiful, sluttish, flushed and sweat-sheened, his eyes unfocused and all pupil. Desmond’s hands clutch at his thighs so hard it hurts and that damned blue shirt’s hanging open and his hips are rocking into air, the hard line of his erection plainly visible beneath his pants. It’s like he’s hungry, no, starving for it and the cock in his mouth is sheer ambrosia. He’s sucking noisily and moaning around Sayid’s dick like it’s the answer to all his prayers and just the sight and sound of it is nearly enough

[zelda_zee]

So instead he runs his fingertips down Desmond’s chest until he gets to one of the three buttons still precariously attached to his shirt, pushes them through the holes and presses his palms to his stomach, feels how the muscles jump at his touch. He unzips Desmond’s trousers and pushes them down over his hips and they fall to the floor and he’s bare underneath and Sayid sees that, no, Desmond is not tanned everywhere

[bachlava]

mmmmmnnnakdjfaldjk;laafd;l

Oh. My. God.

*Dies from the Hott.*

Spot-on characterization; I loved Desmond's post-isolation desperation and Sayid's way of relating to him. You've got them both nailed down (mind out of the gutter;) - wow! And for someone who wasn't feeling too confident about writing Desmond, you've definitely got the hang of it.

[zelda_zee]

I am SO not confident about writing Des! But I decided to take the bull by the horns, as it were, so there you go. I'm glad the characterization came across okay.

Thanks!

[janie_tangerine]

.... okay, you wrote Des/Sayid and I'm squealing like woah. This is nothing short of perfect. They're absolutely spot on, I could completely see this one in each detail. And you've got a perfect Desmond really! That said... I loved how you got how fractured and needy Desmond is and how Sayid is always so considerate (the bed, and he doesn't ruin the blue shirt but carefully slides the buttons? That detail was enough to make me flail on the spot and how he doesn't kiss him because of the Penny factor). And Desmond's logic, I so love it. Oh, and Des totally goes commando in my canon. I think I could ramble on how perfect this is for an hour so I'll just go and read it again. And mem it.

Sayid thrusts shallowly, just to see if it’s okay and Desmond looks up at him, and it’s almost too much, because he looks, he looks, ohhh, he looks good like that, he looks like a vision - debauched, beautiful, sluttish, flushed and sweat-sheened, his eyes unfocused and all pupil. Desmond’s hands clutch at his thighs so hard it hurts and that damned

[zelda_zee]

Thanks! Glad you approve!

Well, you know this is not an easy pairing for me! I just decided it'd be easier to porn them liek whoa than it would be to flirt around idea. So I did.

In spite of the fact that Des still seems basically straight to me, I just decided that maybe I could pretend he was bi for a little while and let him have gay sex and let him enjoy the hell out of it. ;)

[halfdutch]

Oh wow! You wrote this pairing so well! This is perfect! And I love how Sayid still manages to consider Penny during all this ... YUM.

[zelda_zee]

Thanks! I kind of figured if I was going to attempt this pairing I just needed to go for the porn, half-measures were not going to work. I wasn't sure it would work anyway, cuz I'd pretty much convinced myself Desmond is straight. However, after writing this, I'm willing to admit the possibility that he could be bi. Which means I may porn him again sometime, you never know!

I find Penny pretty hard to ignore when it comes to Des, so I had to try to work her relationship with him in somehow.

[thespiansparkle]

....Incredible.

Absolutely incredible.

It takes less that a minute until Desmond gasps, “Oh God, Oh Christ, Oh Jesus,” hitting all the high points of Christian blasphemy in one breath.

This line is perfect. I love it. So appropriate for the former monk :)

Truly, zee, yet another wonderful piece. I feel like this sounds repetitive, but it bears repeating that your use of language is incredibly skillful and always very in character--the voices, the thoughts, the actions, all fit together and fit the characters you're writing. Yes, how Des is acting here is unexpected for Sayid, but it doesn't feel like you've pushed him out of character to fit the story--it's just his character acting differently. That's a true gift and I admire it in you so much.

I always love the way you write Sayid, but the way you write him with Des is just...inspired. I am SO grateful TPTB put them together for awhile...if only for fic like this. Thanks so much, zee! *squish*

[zelda_zee]

*bows deeply*

So glad you like this!

I really had my doubts that I'd be able to pull off Des being not-straight, but I figured it was worth a try. I'm pleased if I managed to not strain credulity overmuch.

Glad you like that blasphemy line. I think it's my favorite of the piece.

I guess I was struck by how protective and careful Sayid was of Des in The Constant. I like that side of him, so it naturally came out here.

Thanks so much!

[elliotsmelliot]

Again, I want to reiterate my happiness that you posted links to your comment porn or else I would have missed this treasure. Wow, it's remarkable how you treated the transition from Desmond’s passionate phone call with Penny to him dropping to his knees for Sayid. I didn't think that could be done with respect or any seriousness but it was, and it was lovely and quite titillating.

[zelda_zee]

I don't tend to write Desmond because of the Penny issue. His whole story is so tied to her that slashing him seems very difficult. I'm glad you think I made it work here. It was actually a lot of fun.

Thanks!

[ficangel]

Fucking God. *fans self* This was amazing.

[zelda_zee]

Why, thank you! High praise, coming from you!