Comments | zenassassin: Now imagine this, over & over in a cycle that NEVER EVER ENDS. yeah...now you get it.

zenassassin

Now imagine this, over & over in a cycle that NEVER EVER ENDS. yeah...now you get it.

Jun 19, 2007 00:06

DEPRESSION: "I doubt completely my ability to do anything well. It seems as though my mind has slowed down and burned out to the point of being virtually useless....[I am] haunt[ed]...with the total, the desperate hopelessness of it all... Others say, "It's only temporary, it will pass, you will get over it," but, of course, they haven't any idea ( Read more... )

bipolar, kay jamison, manic, hypomania

Comments 2

sogi June 20 2007, 02:49:47 UTC

back in chicagoland
get in touch
8472080281

mammatrouble July 21 2007, 20:24:17 UTC

i'm living on the edge of a panic attack. have been this way, despite all the pills the doc can think of to get me, for about a month now.

it's the spending of monies that i don't have, the wasting of resources i'll never have access too, that really messes with me.

i KNOW that the checks will bounce, but i cannot stop myself from writing them.

i KNOW that the rest is due, but i spend that cash on bullshit instead.

it's horrible, being trapped in this prison, looking out and KNOWING that i am fucking up my whole world, but unable to stop myself.

and no one understands. or so i tell myself.

i know that you, and a few others, actually can understand somewhat. because in many ways, my panic-state is like a manic state. My Amy understands. Unfortunately, she's not taking her lithium anymore, even though it was helping, so she leads me along this road of self destruction, helping me to dig a deeper hole for us both to sleep in.

sorry, had to vent.