Hobson's Choice...
Okay so check this out everyone.
I'm 23 years old. I've got a steady, full-time, farily-well paying job. I'm going to start school next year, as I have to wait a year to not pay out-of-state tuition fees (400bove normal for those who don't know). I'm on month 4 of a one year lease with my parents. As Julie would say, "The boy's got his shit together." But this is my worst enemy it seems. Because... well... I'll break this down for you. I had a conversation with my friend tonight... I came to the following conclusions.
==================================
-=Age Bracket Dating Potential=-
::23-25 years old::
Looking for someone 'established', either out of or on their way out of college, with career beginning or in full swing. Generally ready for commitment... possibly even looking for someone to marry. More mature... more experienced. If still single, probably slightly jaded, or unattractive.
Reasons for not going for me: Believe I'm (stereotypically) not mature enough... still 'lives with parents'... hasn't even started college. Therefore, wouldn't really give the 'chance' to become attracted to me, or is already taken.
Reasons for possibly going for me: If they gave me the chance, they'd see that my situations are there for a reason. That I have my head on straight, and have a career path, and everything I do is centered around it. Know that I'm incredibly driven and strong. I'm not in debt, and am currently doing everything the right way. Would have to be patient with me because I probably won't be in full swing until I'm 30. I'm also fairly mature... and a good guy. Not looking for a quick lay. Really open to something concrete and solid, as I HATE meaningless encounters.
::20-22 years old::
Probably still in college, or not going at all. Usually in the 'expiremental' phase of their life... where they want to have fun. The time period where if it's to be regretted later on in life, it's to be done. Generally not looking for commitment unless it falls in their lap and they deem it worthy enough. Slightly less mature, but still looking for someone above their level, or just looking for a good time, or not single.
Reasons for not going for me: Not 'fun'. I'm not a party-person and generally like doing simpler things for fun, like going out for dinner or coffee, going somewhere to talk about life and such. I don't drink and won't get them drunk. I'm safe and sweet, which = boring. I also live with my parents, so that means I'm not 'cool' enough. Also it's a looks factor as well... I don't fit the current generations stereotype of a 'cute guy'.
Reasons for possibly going for me: If they get tired of the average college fare, and want a serious guy to be with. If they don't drink or do drugs and are tired of being around drunk/high people all the time. If they're looking for a guy who is 'going' to be a stable one in the future, as I'm taking advantage of all current resources available to me and trying to make all the right decisions at the sacrifice of being 'cool'.
::18-19 years old::
Looking for someone to 'sweep them off their feet'... just out of High School and now's when the real romance happens right? No more High School drama right? They're finally adults and therefore are much better at handling relationships... or... on the other side of the coin... now they're old enough to have sex without fear of landing their man in jail, so sex they will have. They're heavier partiers than the college age girls.
Reasons for not going for me: Too old, or not old enough (o_O). Not 'hawt' enough. Sometimes they won't want to get attached because they're still in the 'I don't know what I want' phase... so they may have fun, but run at the first sign of commitment (*cough*). Also, they might not be mature ENOUGH to want someone like me. My overall stature and the way I carry myself and my life might be intimdating for someone in this age bracket.
Reasons for possibly going for me: I'm charming. They can see themselves ending up with me. So why not try it now? Honestly... this bracket (3-5 years younger than me) is my most successful bracket of at least getting them to give me a chance before they find out I'm too much for them. They like my 'charm' and my 'maturity', to where it kind of overtakes their senses and makes them fall. It's usually a effort in futility however, as eventually they reach the above bracket.
==================================
So what's the answer? Theoretically I'm screwed from each angle. I can't get the older ones to give me the time of day, the ones my age just aren't interested in serious, and the younger ones are insane. I hope when I get in school, I can at least start being around females that have something in common with me... though I'm sure that's going to present all sorts of NEW problems. The sad thing is, we were put on this earth to form relationships and procreate, as well as to have fun. We are given the ability as humans to do anything we want... but the joke's on us, as all we really want is companionship and to feel happy and to procreate. If I could take a pill to make all sexual/romantic desire go away without that changing the passion I have for the things I love, and totally altering my personality... I would. I would love not to want anything other than my career and be totally selfish and not care about anyone but me. But I can't.
So here I am... I don't fit anyone's 'ideal' beacuse my life's timeline was skewed. Also, I'm beginning to believe there is something fundamentally wrong with my 'attraction-o-matic-circut' that's supposed to be built into me. Somehow, it's set on 'Guy you want to marry someday', and not on 'Guy you want to be with today'. Well guess what girls... you can't just go and marry someone logical when you feel like you're done having fun. It doesn't work that way. You need to be with that guy for a long time before he gives you that chance. So stop telling me how (to sound like my lil' sis) 'Bloody fucking fantastic' I am, and be honest and tell me why girls just aren't 'attracted' to me. I seriously need someone to just not worry about my feelings and tell me what the hell is wrong with me.
In other life news... everything's going ironically swimmingly. I have a major credit card, with which to build credit (as I currently don't exist in the eyes of Equifax, etc.), I just got a new phone in MY name. I have a great job. I'm going to get a new car once said credit is built up. I look and feel better than I ever have. I'm more healthy than I've ever been. I'm in a better location, that's beautiful and filled with culture. My 'pragmatic' life is going awesome. I'd just like to have a little fire. Something to make me feel alive. I tasted a little blood this weekend, and now I'm kinda hungry... like a vampire woken up from his sleep. And since I can't have what I want, because what I want isn't what I want, then I want something else. Ideally I don't want anything... but I have that taste in my mouth and I can't get rid of it. I wish Amy would have been that for me... so much, but she can't. I have to accept that and move on. She did however wake up the sleeping beast inside me. A feat few could have done. So now he's awake, and looking around. It's going to take a long time again to lull him back to sleep. So I need something to keep him entertained, else he'll drive me insane with his constant noise and activity. What do I do? My friends, help me out.
-R
I'm 23 years old. I've got a steady, full-time, farily-well paying job. I'm going to start school next year, as I have to wait a year to not pay out-of-state tuition fees (400bove normal for those who don't know). I'm on month 4 of a one year lease with my parents. As Julie would say, "The boy's got his shit together." But this is my worst enemy it seems. Because... well... I'll break this down for you. I had a conversation with my friend tonight... I came to the following conclusions.
==================================
-=Age Bracket Dating Potential=-
::23-25 years old::
Looking for someone 'established', either out of or on their way out of college, with career beginning or in full swing. Generally ready for commitment... possibly even looking for someone to marry. More mature... more experienced. If still single, probably slightly jaded, or unattractive.
Reasons for not going for me: Believe I'm (stereotypically) not mature enough... still 'lives with parents'... hasn't even started college. Therefore, wouldn't really give the 'chance' to become attracted to me, or is already taken.
Reasons for possibly going for me: If they gave me the chance, they'd see that my situations are there for a reason. That I have my head on straight, and have a career path, and everything I do is centered around it. Know that I'm incredibly driven and strong. I'm not in debt, and am currently doing everything the right way. Would have to be patient with me because I probably won't be in full swing until I'm 30. I'm also fairly mature... and a good guy. Not looking for a quick lay. Really open to something concrete and solid, as I HATE meaningless encounters.
::20-22 years old::
Probably still in college, or not going at all. Usually in the 'expiremental' phase of their life... where they want to have fun. The time period where if it's to be regretted later on in life, it's to be done. Generally not looking for commitment unless it falls in their lap and they deem it worthy enough. Slightly less mature, but still looking for someone above their level, or just looking for a good time, or not single.
Reasons for not going for me: Not 'fun'. I'm not a party-person and generally like doing simpler things for fun, like going out for dinner or coffee, going somewhere to talk about life and such. I don't drink and won't get them drunk. I'm safe and sweet, which = boring. I also live with my parents, so that means I'm not 'cool' enough. Also it's a looks factor as well... I don't fit the current generations stereotype of a 'cute guy'.
Reasons for possibly going for me: If they get tired of the average college fare, and want a serious guy to be with. If they don't drink or do drugs and are tired of being around drunk/high people all the time. If they're looking for a guy who is 'going' to be a stable one in the future, as I'm taking advantage of all current resources available to me and trying to make all the right decisions at the sacrifice of being 'cool'.
::18-19 years old::
Looking for someone to 'sweep them off their feet'... just out of High School and now's when the real romance happens right? No more High School drama right? They're finally adults and therefore are much better at handling relationships... or... on the other side of the coin... now they're old enough to have sex without fear of landing their man in jail, so sex they will have. They're heavier partiers than the college age girls.
Reasons for not going for me: Too old, or not old enough (o_O). Not 'hawt' enough. Sometimes they won't want to get attached because they're still in the 'I don't know what I want' phase... so they may have fun, but run at the first sign of commitment (*cough*). Also, they might not be mature ENOUGH to want someone like me. My overall stature and the way I carry myself and my life might be intimdating for someone in this age bracket.
Reasons for possibly going for me: I'm charming. They can see themselves ending up with me. So why not try it now? Honestly... this bracket (3-5 years younger than me) is my most successful bracket of at least getting them to give me a chance before they find out I'm too much for them. They like my 'charm' and my 'maturity', to where it kind of overtakes their senses and makes them fall. It's usually a effort in futility however, as eventually they reach the above bracket.
==================================
So what's the answer? Theoretically I'm screwed from each angle. I can't get the older ones to give me the time of day, the ones my age just aren't interested in serious, and the younger ones are insane. I hope when I get in school, I can at least start being around females that have something in common with me... though I'm sure that's going to present all sorts of NEW problems. The sad thing is, we were put on this earth to form relationships and procreate, as well as to have fun. We are given the ability as humans to do anything we want... but the joke's on us, as all we really want is companionship and to feel happy and to procreate. If I could take a pill to make all sexual/romantic desire go away without that changing the passion I have for the things I love, and totally altering my personality... I would. I would love not to want anything other than my career and be totally selfish and not care about anyone but me. But I can't.
So here I am... I don't fit anyone's 'ideal' beacuse my life's timeline was skewed. Also, I'm beginning to believe there is something fundamentally wrong with my 'attraction-o-matic-circut' that's supposed to be built into me. Somehow, it's set on 'Guy you want to marry someday', and not on 'Guy you want to be with today'. Well guess what girls... you can't just go and marry someone logical when you feel like you're done having fun. It doesn't work that way. You need to be with that guy for a long time before he gives you that chance. So stop telling me how (to sound like my lil' sis) 'Bloody fucking fantastic' I am, and be honest and tell me why girls just aren't 'attracted' to me. I seriously need someone to just not worry about my feelings and tell me what the hell is wrong with me.
In other life news... everything's going ironically swimmingly. I have a major credit card, with which to build credit (as I currently don't exist in the eyes of Equifax, etc.), I just got a new phone in MY name. I have a great job. I'm going to get a new car once said credit is built up. I look and feel better than I ever have. I'm more healthy than I've ever been. I'm in a better location, that's beautiful and filled with culture. My 'pragmatic' life is going awesome. I'd just like to have a little fire. Something to make me feel alive. I tasted a little blood this weekend, and now I'm kinda hungry... like a vampire woken up from his sleep. And since I can't have what I want, because what I want isn't what I want, then I want something else. Ideally I don't want anything... but I have that taste in my mouth and I can't get rid of it. I wish Amy would have been that for me... so much, but she can't. I have to accept that and move on. She did however wake up the sleeping beast inside me. A feat few could have done. So now he's awake, and looking around. It's going to take a long time again to lull him back to sleep. So I need something to keep him entertained, else he'll drive me insane with his constant noise and activity. What do I do? My friends, help me out.
-R