okay. you don't deserve this. you haven't pushed me away...anywhere. you can talk to me. i will not judge you. i will not hate you. i will not think badly of you. i will be here unconditionally for you. i will never tell you to stop crying when you are, i know how impossible it is to stop on command. i will never tell you to shut up when you are talking, i know that sometimes you just need to let it all out. if when you say "everything seems so hopelessly stupid right now" you are including yourself, you're wrong. you're amazing, beautiful, talented, wise, great at giving advice...you're just the kind of friend i could use more of. i'm not saying this to tell you everything you want to here. i'm saying this to tell you how you mean something to me. in fact...you mean more to me than the england trip. it would be nothing close to the same without you coming and being there with me. you mean more to me than that one person that means so much to me. life would just not be the same without you. i know you're hurting
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and what exactly isn't okay...?
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