“Problem Sam?” (Stargate SG-1, Ensemble, Gen, PG)
Title: “Problem Sam?”
Author: chibifukurou
Fandom: Stargate SG1
Pairing: gen, ensemble
Summary: Baal's latest plan to take over the world involves zombies.
Rating: PG
“I’m not qualified to fix THIS.” Sam shrieked.
That got Cam’s attention. Sam didn’t shriek. She was the calm and collected one. They’d been having a meeting with General Landry to discuss Baal’s latest scheme to take over the world when Sam had started freaking out.
Even Vala had been impressed by Sam’s out of character behavior. She actually stopped filing her nails to stare at Sam.
“Problem Sam?” Cam asked.
“No, no problem. I’m just not sure how to handle a situation like this.” That might have been easier for Cam to believe if Sam’s voice hadn’t been shaking. Sitting forward in his chair he tried to catch Sam’s eyes, but she was too busy shuffling the papers she’d brought to the meeting to notice.
“I would think the incidents with Baal’s clones would have been harder to deal with. Even pop culture has figured out how to beat zombie incursions.” Sam twitched at the mention of pop culture.
“How exactly has pop culture figured out how to beat zombie incursions?” Sam raised her eyebrow.
“Well you know, chop off the head, shoot them with a shotgun. My kind of a solution.”
“I don’t think those can be considered actual solutions considering that every movie in which those means of zombie destruction have been used end with everybody dying.”
“What does Daniel mean everybody dies! I’m not dying because a bunch of humans decided to start walking around!”
“Calm down Vala. Nobody is dying. After all we’ve got Sam and Daniel on our side. They haven’t failed us yet.”
“Fine, but if it looks like we’re going to die. I’m heading through the gate.” Point made Vala leaned back in her chair, put her feet up on the conference table, and returned to filing her nails.
Cam couldn’t keep from rolling his eyes. Vala would never change. “So Sam, you never answered. What’s so bad about zombies?”
“There’s nothing wrong, I just don’t like them. Not to mention, its scientifically impossible for corpses to be reanimated.”
Cam chuckled. “Don’t tell me you’re scared of a bunch of zombies, Sam?”
Sam was about to give a scathing reply when General Landry decided to interrupt the theatrics. “Enough. Lt. Colonel Carter, the soldiers we sent to investigate the reports of zombies have return with the technology that was present in Baal’s hideout. I expect you to study it and let us know if any of it is capable of raising the dead. Colonel Mitchell since you’re so knowledgeable about zombies why don’t you lead a team of soldiers on a reconnaissance mission and see if you can locate Baal.”
Cam sighed. He’d been having fun teasing Sam. Still, he got to fight zombies so at least something good had come from this whole mess. He couldn’t wait to see if zombie brains splattered like they did in the movies!
Author: chibifukurou
Fandom: Stargate SG1
Pairing: gen, ensemble
Summary: Baal's latest plan to take over the world involves zombies.
Rating: PG
“I’m not qualified to fix THIS.” Sam shrieked.
That got Cam’s attention. Sam didn’t shriek. She was the calm and collected one. They’d been having a meeting with General Landry to discuss Baal’s latest scheme to take over the world when Sam had started freaking out.
Even Vala had been impressed by Sam’s out of character behavior. She actually stopped filing her nails to stare at Sam.
“Problem Sam?” Cam asked.
“No, no problem. I’m just not sure how to handle a situation like this.” That might have been easier for Cam to believe if Sam’s voice hadn’t been shaking. Sitting forward in his chair he tried to catch Sam’s eyes, but she was too busy shuffling the papers she’d brought to the meeting to notice.
“I would think the incidents with Baal’s clones would have been harder to deal with. Even pop culture has figured out how to beat zombie incursions.” Sam twitched at the mention of pop culture.
“How exactly has pop culture figured out how to beat zombie incursions?” Sam raised her eyebrow.
“Well you know, chop off the head, shoot them with a shotgun. My kind of a solution.”
“I don’t think those can be considered actual solutions considering that every movie in which those means of zombie destruction have been used end with everybody dying.”
“What does Daniel mean everybody dies! I’m not dying because a bunch of humans decided to start walking around!”
“Calm down Vala. Nobody is dying. After all we’ve got Sam and Daniel on our side. They haven’t failed us yet.”
“Fine, but if it looks like we’re going to die. I’m heading through the gate.” Point made Vala leaned back in her chair, put her feet up on the conference table, and returned to filing her nails.
Cam couldn’t keep from rolling his eyes. Vala would never change. “So Sam, you never answered. What’s so bad about zombies?”
“There’s nothing wrong, I just don’t like them. Not to mention, its scientifically impossible for corpses to be reanimated.”
Cam chuckled. “Don’t tell me you’re scared of a bunch of zombies, Sam?”
Sam was about to give a scathing reply when General Landry decided to interrupt the theatrics. “Enough. Lt. Colonel Carter, the soldiers we sent to investigate the reports of zombies have return with the technology that was present in Baal’s hideout. I expect you to study it and let us know if any of it is capable of raising the dead. Colonel Mitchell since you’re so knowledgeable about zombies why don’t you lead a team of soldiers on a reconnaissance mission and see if you can locate Baal.”
Cam sighed. He’d been having fun teasing Sam. Still, he got to fight zombies so at least something good had come from this whole mess. He couldn’t wait to see if zombie brains splattered like they did in the movies!