Ice of Oblivion 22
Title: Ice of Oblivion Chapter 22/24
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 22
Castiel inhaled deeply when he awoke from what he could only describe as a desert haze. He couldn’t remember much about why he was there or what happened to him … all he could remember was the hurt look Dean gave him, the battle and the demon…
Castiel would have thrust himself up if not for the terrible pain that coursed through his bones whenever he so much as twitched. The demon hurt Dean; Castiel failed him a second time. He inhaled again and was relieved when the only thing he smelled was Dean - peppermint soap, gunpowder and limes - and all he felt was the sticky texture of sweaty skin against skin. If Dean was there than that meant he was going to be okay…
Now that he didn’t have to worry about Dean he could focus on this low feeling that seemed to weigh him down. He couldn’t remember what happened after that demon attacked Dean, he knew he tried to save him and was probably too late; but it was still a mystery. Why was he unconscious? Was he attacked to?
Who could say for sure whether or not he was alive, who’s to say Dean’s alive?
Castiel eyes fell to the ground and he saw that it was moving. Frowning, he looked a little further out and saw a black horse leg padding along in a constant stream, blowing dust that created clouds that settles back after a couple of seconds in the air. He was on a horse and if the jingle of the golden band on its ankle was any indication, it was the Impala.
The throb in his body was starting to dull and numb and Castiel felt good about moving again. So he raised his arms from where they were - hanging loosely down the side of the horse - and placed them on the firm hips of the man in front of him. He used them as leverage to lift his face from the back of a man’s neck and upon seeing a dusty blond head he concluded that Dean was here and he was okay.
Dean turned around when he lost the sticky warmth of his betrothed and smiled sadly at him.
“Hey, you’re awake.”
Castiel nodded but didn’t speak. His eyes scanned his surroundings and he frowned. They were far away from the mild greenery of their previous battlefield and they were now in complete Greenland and were obviously very close to, if not, in Inim.
“Where are we?”
Dean looked back at him again with the same smile that set Castiel’s heart aflame. “We’re almost home. Should only be a couple of hours now.”
Castiel nodded, accepting his answer. Then he felt it, the slightest tinge of his power and his essence flickering like a candle with wind blowing at its heels. What was happening to him? If Dean was okay did that mean he wasn’t?
“What happened?”
The smile on Dean’s face wavered and his green eyes fell to the ground before they disappeared from Castiel’s view altogether. Worry crept up his spine before being replaced with stark apprehension. Dean was silent for a while as he fiddled with the reigns of his horse and falsely started several times.
Growing irritated, Castiel turned away from the back of Dean’s silent head and looked around at the people following them. And to his surprise they were all looking at him too; all of them covered in bruises and some were still bleeding. Though their expressions varied: Luke looked traumatized and was silent (for once) and when he noticed Castiel looking at him he did his best to avoid his eyes. Jo looked like she was about to cry when her eyes snapped back and forth between Dean and Castiel with more tears forming when she caught Casitel’s eye. She turned away quickly and focused on her horse. Trent looked angry, his knuckled were white as clouds as he gripped onto the horses reigns and his two front teeth threatened to puncture his bottom lip. His angel brothers and sister were the worse though. Their sadness was deep and though their faces were blank, Castiel could gaze into their eyes and feel their depression tearing through his soul and making him feel almost as weighed down as he did that time he saw Dean after he was stabbed.
Turning back to Dean, Castiel pressed him further. “Dean, what happened?”
Dean still didn’t turn around, but he did speak. “I’ll tell you later…”
Castiel was about to argue but when he felt the way Dean tense up he decided against it. Though whatever happened involved him, it was obviously having a negative effect on everyone else. If Dean wanted to wait then he was willing to wait.
They rode in silence. Castiel spent the majority of his time trying to relax his betrother - who seemed to have forgiven him for his earlier indiscretions - by rubbing or squeezing his hips and sometimes running his hand over the top of his thigh. Dean was calm by the time they stopped for the night.
Dean hopped off his horse and told Castiel to wait there while he took care of some business. It wasn’t particularly private business because Castiel could have heard the heated argument that Dean was having with Anna and Raphael from a mile away.
“He should stay out here with us. We can take better care if him than you,” Anna insisted, her voice was fierce and heated.
“Like hell you can,” Dean barked.
“Winchester, you know just as well as we do Castiel has to be in the presence of his own kind. We can keep him energized until we get back to Inim - “
“- And then what? Huh? You call his asshole brothers up to tell them what happened so they can skin me alive and put Castiel in some snug box until he get’s his life back?”
“No, so that they can find a way to help him!” Anna said firmly.
“What the hell do you think they can do? There have been thousands of angel’s who’ve been zapped out by that damn curse and they haven’t been able to save one. Why the hell do you think Cas will be any different?”
Castiel suppressed a gasp. That’s what happened! He did have suspicions, but for it to really be true. He was going to -
“Because he’s their blood, their brother.”
“So, if Sam was shot in the head do you think my love for my brother would be enough to take his brains off the wall and put them back in his head?”
“This is different…”
“You know just as well as I do that it’s the same damn thing.”
There was a long pause before Anna spoke again, this time in an almost regretful tone.
“Be reasonable.”
“Reasonable? I am being reasonable. Cas is about to die and you’re trying to keep him away from me.”
“We are not trying to keep him away from you, stop acting like a child! We’re trying to help him,” Raphael snapped.
There was another bout of overwrought silence before Castiel heard Dean’s tense voice, now laced with sadness and … tears? “I am the crown prince of Inim and that means I am the leader of this group. I have the last say on everything that happens in this camp -“
Anna interrupted. “You may be the King of Inim but we are all under siege of Himmel’s leaders. We do not answer to you!”
“And not only am I King,” Dean continued. “I am also Cas’ fiancé, I have complete and total say in all things concerning the man who’s going to be my husband.” There was a very long bout of silence, in which he angels were silent and still and the next voice he heard was Dean’s. ”But, hey, what the hell do I know? Let’s ask him.”
No one spoke for a while and then Anna, in a small regretful voice, spoke up. “You get your way … your highness.”
The three flooded from behind the tree and Castiel averted his eyes to give off the illusion that he was not listening. His mind was racing; he’d been cursed. He should have inferred because of his sudden lose of energy and memory of what happened. But, if he’d been cursed than why was he awake at all? He should be in a comatose state until the effects wore off or until his father calls him back into paradise, whichever came first.
He could feel all of his essence bleeding away slowly; the curse was having an effect on him albeit a slow one. He inferred that he would be a soulless shell in less than a week.
He could barely feel sorry for himself, it was an unfortunate accident of course, but it wasn’t like he was going to feel anything until he was awake again or in his father’s embrace. He pitied his brother, they would have to cope with losing their brother; the same brother they’d been with for millenniums. They would grieve heavily for him just as he would for them if there were similar circumstances.
“Cas, baby, can you hear me?”
Castiel blinked stupidly and raked his eyes over his new surroundings. He was no longer on top of the horse or even outside. He was inside of a tent more than likely Dean’s tent and it was early evening based on the light shadows coming from outside. He noticed Dean; he was looking at Castiel deep in the eye with the most troubled look on his face; his mouth was tight and his eyes were completely glazed over, his face was moistened but had clear wiping marks all over it and his arms were shaking where he grasped Castiel’s shoulder.
“…Dean…” Castiel muttered. He was troubled by Dean’s vulnerable and sad expression, raising his arms to Dean’s waist he was about to ask him what was wrong when Dean smashed their lips together and wrapped his arms around Castiel’s neck.
He closed his eyes and tightened his grip on Dean’s firm waist, enjoying the warmth and familiarity of this position with him. He could not, at that moment, be any happier. He loved this man so much.
After a very long time of Dean kissing him, Castiel pulled away and smiled a weak smile while stroking Dean’s waist. “Are you okay?”
Dean huffed out a short laugh and looked down, shaking his head. His hands fell from Castiel’s neck and he ran them up and down his chest in a circular motion.
“What happened?” Castiel asked him. Dean looked at Castiel, the same look that he used earlier only this time he knew he was going to have to say something. When Dean didn’t speak, Castiel stopped his placations and held Dean in a tighter grip. “Dean,” He pressed.
Dean rolled his eyes, sighed and moved around so that he sat beside Castiel instead of leaning on his knees in front of him. He was slow to start, but he did, “You tried to save me from that demon, when he saw you he attacked you. Before I knew it, he had his hand wrapped around your neck and he cursed you. I tried to stop him but -“ Dean sighed heavily. “ - I stabbed him and I tried to wake you, but you wouldn’t.” Dean dropped his head into his waiting hands, frustrated. “When you woke up on the horse everyone could see that you were out of it and then you blacked out again and I brought you here. That’s it.”
Reaching over, Castiel ran his hand over Dean’s back and hummed a short, “Mmmm…”
“It wasn’t your fault Dean,” He claimed.
Dean didn’t answer he just accepted Castiel’s offered comfort, it went on like this for a while before Dean sat up again with a wet face and deep frown. “How long do you think you got?”
Castiel shrugged. “A few more days, maybe less. You can never tell with these things.”
Dean nodded, he peered at the empty space at the end of the tent with a small frown for a very long silent stretch before he turned around with a small smile, it was both sad and mischievous.
“Hey, we’re only a couple of hours away from home. When we get back, I still have time to show you my room, my doll collection; we can play with all my old toys…” Castiel chuckled and so did Dean. They went on with nervous chuckles as Dean continued to come up with all of his plans for when they got back; they seemed to get more outrageous, impossible and ludicrous as time went on. That is until Dean mentioned one little thing.
“And we’ll get married…” Dean obviously didn’t know what he was saying when he said that and quickly looked away from Castiel and into the very corner of his tent.
Castiel heard him through and with a gaped mouth and expression of wonderment he turned around, placing a hand on Dean’s lower arm. “Really Dean?”
Dean shrugged and did his best to look nonchalant, but was failing miserably. “Well, we are betrothed aren’t we?” Dean asked defensively.
“Do you want to get married when we get back?” Castiel asked, his grip tightening on Dean’s arm. He couldn’t honestly say that he had not dreamed about this moment for the past twenty years, Dean was older and gorgeous, and still so warm; if he was going to simmer out he would like to do it with the knowledge that Dean was his and his alone.
Dean’s eyes seemed to light up and his mouth twitched up into a small grin. “Do you want to?”
Castiel nodded without hesitation. “I’ve been waiting for this for so long.”
Dean laughed, not one of amusement or humor, but one of relief. “Let’s do it, let’s get married.”
Nodding, Castiel threaded his fingers into Dean’s hair and pulled him into a forceful kiss. He snaked his tongue into Dean’s mouth feeling nervous because this was the first time he’d ever initiated a kiss before; but Dean didn’t seem to mind because he kissed Castiel back allowing him to take control.
Dean pulled back far enough so that their lips weren’t touching but still in close enough so that Castiel could feel his warm breath ghosting over his lips. “You know the best part about getting married all rushed like this?”
Castiel panted and tightened his grip on Dean’s hair. “What?”
“We don’t have to go through all of that royal bullshit,” Dean said harshly. Castiel laughed lightly and nodded knowingly. “No feast, no commoners, no orchestras. Just you and me… and those asshole families of ours.”
Castiel nodded. “Yes, that’s good. The preparations would take ages, we don’t have nearly enough time.”
Something seemed to shift in Dean’s eyes and the excitement quickly turned somber and in obvious desperation, he placed his hands on Castiel’s cheeks and pulled him down with him when he fell to the floor.
Castiel laid flat on top of Dean’s body and ran his hands up and down Dean’s sides and upper thighs while Dean kissed him on the neck. He flinched when a wave of pleasure racked through his body after one particular lick on his collarbone.
“Dean,” Castiel panted. “What are you doing?”
He groaned when the rough wetness disappeared from his neck and shivered when a soft laugh from Dean made air blow on the sensitive spot. “I am so glad you’re a virgin.”
Castiel grimaced and moved his head in between Dean’s shoulder and neck, placed his mouth on his collarbone and sucked. Dean moaned and wrapped his arm around Castiel’s neck, pulling him closer.
“I think I learn pretty fast.”
Castiel’s smile widened when he heard Dean’s laughter and he ran his hands up Dean’s arm and back down again. It seemed that as the laughter wore on it stopped sounding like laughter and sounded more similar to sobs. Without getting up and embarrassing Dean any further than he probably did already. He reached back to where Dean’s hands were and held them; he had to move down slightly to achieve such a feat. But Dean’s hands were as warm as his soul and it made Castiel feel full again.
As soon as Castiel threaded his fingers into Dean’s, Dean gripped his in a vice grip-like clutch. And it was in that moment that Castiel realized he pitied Dean too.
He spent the majority of his time focusing on how he was hurting his brothers by leaving. He never once thought of how Dean would feel; they were in love with each other. Dean was his friend and has been for almost twenty years; Castiel was supposed to be his guardian angel. Once again, he would have to leave him to fend for himself. With the Final Battle coming and Dean being the front runner he was going to need Castiel there, he’d planned to be there with Dean. Now he was going to be alone.
Castiel always pitied Dean. Ever since the first moment that he laid eyes on him. But, not so much as that moment.
“Did I black out again?” Castiel asked when Dean was relatively calm.
He felt Dean nodding and tightened his grip on his hands. “Yeah, it wasn’t so long this time.”
“I apologize Dean.”
“Not your fault.”
They sat there in silence for what seemed like hours before Dean spoke. “How does it feel?”
“How does what feel?”
“Being cursed.”
“I don’t feel anything at all, it’s like I’ve become nothing.”
Dean took his hands from Castiel’s and forcible lifted his head from the crock of his neck and kissed him soundly. Castiel moaned and felt a familiar spark in his stomach. He pulled away with a low smack and smiled down at him. “I think the only time I can feel anything is when I’m looking into your eyes.”
Dean looked truly touched but he laughed it off and shook his head. “Dude, I’m not a chick, I’m not so easily swayed.”
“I love you.” Castiel stated simply.
Dean smirked and kissed him on the jaw. “I love you too.”
Castiel ran his finger down Dean’s face, resting it on his lips. “I can’t wait to marry you.”
Dean placed his hand onto the top button of Castiel’s shirt, fingering it steadily. “I know a way I can make you feel a whole lot.”
Castiel smiled. “How much?”
“Everything.”
Next
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 22
Castiel inhaled deeply when he awoke from what he could only describe as a desert haze. He couldn’t remember much about why he was there or what happened to him … all he could remember was the hurt look Dean gave him, the battle and the demon…
Castiel would have thrust himself up if not for the terrible pain that coursed through his bones whenever he so much as twitched. The demon hurt Dean; Castiel failed him a second time. He inhaled again and was relieved when the only thing he smelled was Dean - peppermint soap, gunpowder and limes - and all he felt was the sticky texture of sweaty skin against skin. If Dean was there than that meant he was going to be okay…
Now that he didn’t have to worry about Dean he could focus on this low feeling that seemed to weigh him down. He couldn’t remember what happened after that demon attacked Dean, he knew he tried to save him and was probably too late; but it was still a mystery. Why was he unconscious? Was he attacked to?
Who could say for sure whether or not he was alive, who’s to say Dean’s alive?
Castiel eyes fell to the ground and he saw that it was moving. Frowning, he looked a little further out and saw a black horse leg padding along in a constant stream, blowing dust that created clouds that settles back after a couple of seconds in the air. He was on a horse and if the jingle of the golden band on its ankle was any indication, it was the Impala.
The throb in his body was starting to dull and numb and Castiel felt good about moving again. So he raised his arms from where they were - hanging loosely down the side of the horse - and placed them on the firm hips of the man in front of him. He used them as leverage to lift his face from the back of a man’s neck and upon seeing a dusty blond head he concluded that Dean was here and he was okay.
Dean turned around when he lost the sticky warmth of his betrothed and smiled sadly at him.
“Hey, you’re awake.”
Castiel nodded but didn’t speak. His eyes scanned his surroundings and he frowned. They were far away from the mild greenery of their previous battlefield and they were now in complete Greenland and were obviously very close to, if not, in Inim.
“Where are we?”
Dean looked back at him again with the same smile that set Castiel’s heart aflame. “We’re almost home. Should only be a couple of hours now.”
Castiel nodded, accepting his answer. Then he felt it, the slightest tinge of his power and his essence flickering like a candle with wind blowing at its heels. What was happening to him? If Dean was okay did that mean he wasn’t?
“What happened?”
The smile on Dean’s face wavered and his green eyes fell to the ground before they disappeared from Castiel’s view altogether. Worry crept up his spine before being replaced with stark apprehension. Dean was silent for a while as he fiddled with the reigns of his horse and falsely started several times.
Growing irritated, Castiel turned away from the back of Dean’s silent head and looked around at the people following them. And to his surprise they were all looking at him too; all of them covered in bruises and some were still bleeding. Though their expressions varied: Luke looked traumatized and was silent (for once) and when he noticed Castiel looking at him he did his best to avoid his eyes. Jo looked like she was about to cry when her eyes snapped back and forth between Dean and Castiel with more tears forming when she caught Casitel’s eye. She turned away quickly and focused on her horse. Trent looked angry, his knuckled were white as clouds as he gripped onto the horses reigns and his two front teeth threatened to puncture his bottom lip. His angel brothers and sister were the worse though. Their sadness was deep and though their faces were blank, Castiel could gaze into their eyes and feel their depression tearing through his soul and making him feel almost as weighed down as he did that time he saw Dean after he was stabbed.
Turning back to Dean, Castiel pressed him further. “Dean, what happened?”
Dean still didn’t turn around, but he did speak. “I’ll tell you later…”
Castiel was about to argue but when he felt the way Dean tense up he decided against it. Though whatever happened involved him, it was obviously having a negative effect on everyone else. If Dean wanted to wait then he was willing to wait.
They rode in silence. Castiel spent the majority of his time trying to relax his betrother - who seemed to have forgiven him for his earlier indiscretions - by rubbing or squeezing his hips and sometimes running his hand over the top of his thigh. Dean was calm by the time they stopped for the night.
Dean hopped off his horse and told Castiel to wait there while he took care of some business. It wasn’t particularly private business because Castiel could have heard the heated argument that Dean was having with Anna and Raphael from a mile away.
“He should stay out here with us. We can take better care if him than you,” Anna insisted, her voice was fierce and heated.
“Like hell you can,” Dean barked.
“Winchester, you know just as well as we do Castiel has to be in the presence of his own kind. We can keep him energized until we get back to Inim - “
“- And then what? Huh? You call his asshole brothers up to tell them what happened so they can skin me alive and put Castiel in some snug box until he get’s his life back?”
“No, so that they can find a way to help him!” Anna said firmly.
“What the hell do you think they can do? There have been thousands of angel’s who’ve been zapped out by that damn curse and they haven’t been able to save one. Why the hell do you think Cas will be any different?”
Castiel suppressed a gasp. That’s what happened! He did have suspicions, but for it to really be true. He was going to -
“Because he’s their blood, their brother.”
“So, if Sam was shot in the head do you think my love for my brother would be enough to take his brains off the wall and put them back in his head?”
“This is different…”
“You know just as well as I do that it’s the same damn thing.”
There was a long pause before Anna spoke again, this time in an almost regretful tone.
“Be reasonable.”
“Reasonable? I am being reasonable. Cas is about to die and you’re trying to keep him away from me.”
“We are not trying to keep him away from you, stop acting like a child! We’re trying to help him,” Raphael snapped.
There was another bout of overwrought silence before Castiel heard Dean’s tense voice, now laced with sadness and … tears? “I am the crown prince of Inim and that means I am the leader of this group. I have the last say on everything that happens in this camp -“
Anna interrupted. “You may be the King of Inim but we are all under siege of Himmel’s leaders. We do not answer to you!”
“And not only am I King,” Dean continued. “I am also Cas’ fiancé, I have complete and total say in all things concerning the man who’s going to be my husband.” There was a very long bout of silence, in which he angels were silent and still and the next voice he heard was Dean’s. ”But, hey, what the hell do I know? Let’s ask him.”
No one spoke for a while and then Anna, in a small regretful voice, spoke up. “You get your way … your highness.”
The three flooded from behind the tree and Castiel averted his eyes to give off the illusion that he was not listening. His mind was racing; he’d been cursed. He should have inferred because of his sudden lose of energy and memory of what happened. But, if he’d been cursed than why was he awake at all? He should be in a comatose state until the effects wore off or until his father calls him back into paradise, whichever came first.
He could feel all of his essence bleeding away slowly; the curse was having an effect on him albeit a slow one. He inferred that he would be a soulless shell in less than a week.
He could barely feel sorry for himself, it was an unfortunate accident of course, but it wasn’t like he was going to feel anything until he was awake again or in his father’s embrace. He pitied his brother, they would have to cope with losing their brother; the same brother they’d been with for millenniums. They would grieve heavily for him just as he would for them if there were similar circumstances.
“Cas, baby, can you hear me?”
Castiel blinked stupidly and raked his eyes over his new surroundings. He was no longer on top of the horse or even outside. He was inside of a tent more than likely Dean’s tent and it was early evening based on the light shadows coming from outside. He noticed Dean; he was looking at Castiel deep in the eye with the most troubled look on his face; his mouth was tight and his eyes were completely glazed over, his face was moistened but had clear wiping marks all over it and his arms were shaking where he grasped Castiel’s shoulder.
“…Dean…” Castiel muttered. He was troubled by Dean’s vulnerable and sad expression, raising his arms to Dean’s waist he was about to ask him what was wrong when Dean smashed their lips together and wrapped his arms around Castiel’s neck.
He closed his eyes and tightened his grip on Dean’s firm waist, enjoying the warmth and familiarity of this position with him. He could not, at that moment, be any happier. He loved this man so much.
After a very long time of Dean kissing him, Castiel pulled away and smiled a weak smile while stroking Dean’s waist. “Are you okay?”
Dean huffed out a short laugh and looked down, shaking his head. His hands fell from Castiel’s neck and he ran them up and down his chest in a circular motion.
“What happened?” Castiel asked him. Dean looked at Castiel, the same look that he used earlier only this time he knew he was going to have to say something. When Dean didn’t speak, Castiel stopped his placations and held Dean in a tighter grip. “Dean,” He pressed.
Dean rolled his eyes, sighed and moved around so that he sat beside Castiel instead of leaning on his knees in front of him. He was slow to start, but he did, “You tried to save me from that demon, when he saw you he attacked you. Before I knew it, he had his hand wrapped around your neck and he cursed you. I tried to stop him but -“ Dean sighed heavily. “ - I stabbed him and I tried to wake you, but you wouldn’t.” Dean dropped his head into his waiting hands, frustrated. “When you woke up on the horse everyone could see that you were out of it and then you blacked out again and I brought you here. That’s it.”
Reaching over, Castiel ran his hand over Dean’s back and hummed a short, “Mmmm…”
“It wasn’t your fault Dean,” He claimed.
Dean didn’t answer he just accepted Castiel’s offered comfort, it went on like this for a while before Dean sat up again with a wet face and deep frown. “How long do you think you got?”
Castiel shrugged. “A few more days, maybe less. You can never tell with these things.”
Dean nodded, he peered at the empty space at the end of the tent with a small frown for a very long silent stretch before he turned around with a small smile, it was both sad and mischievous.
“Hey, we’re only a couple of hours away from home. When we get back, I still have time to show you my room, my doll collection; we can play with all my old toys…” Castiel chuckled and so did Dean. They went on with nervous chuckles as Dean continued to come up with all of his plans for when they got back; they seemed to get more outrageous, impossible and ludicrous as time went on. That is until Dean mentioned one little thing.
“And we’ll get married…” Dean obviously didn’t know what he was saying when he said that and quickly looked away from Castiel and into the very corner of his tent.
Castiel heard him through and with a gaped mouth and expression of wonderment he turned around, placing a hand on Dean’s lower arm. “Really Dean?”
Dean shrugged and did his best to look nonchalant, but was failing miserably. “Well, we are betrothed aren’t we?” Dean asked defensively.
“Do you want to get married when we get back?” Castiel asked, his grip tightening on Dean’s arm. He couldn’t honestly say that he had not dreamed about this moment for the past twenty years, Dean was older and gorgeous, and still so warm; if he was going to simmer out he would like to do it with the knowledge that Dean was his and his alone.
Dean’s eyes seemed to light up and his mouth twitched up into a small grin. “Do you want to?”
Castiel nodded without hesitation. “I’ve been waiting for this for so long.”
Dean laughed, not one of amusement or humor, but one of relief. “Let’s do it, let’s get married.”
Nodding, Castiel threaded his fingers into Dean’s hair and pulled him into a forceful kiss. He snaked his tongue into Dean’s mouth feeling nervous because this was the first time he’d ever initiated a kiss before; but Dean didn’t seem to mind because he kissed Castiel back allowing him to take control.
Dean pulled back far enough so that their lips weren’t touching but still in close enough so that Castiel could feel his warm breath ghosting over his lips. “You know the best part about getting married all rushed like this?”
Castiel panted and tightened his grip on Dean’s hair. “What?”
“We don’t have to go through all of that royal bullshit,” Dean said harshly. Castiel laughed lightly and nodded knowingly. “No feast, no commoners, no orchestras. Just you and me… and those asshole families of ours.”
Castiel nodded. “Yes, that’s good. The preparations would take ages, we don’t have nearly enough time.”
Something seemed to shift in Dean’s eyes and the excitement quickly turned somber and in obvious desperation, he placed his hands on Castiel’s cheeks and pulled him down with him when he fell to the floor.
Castiel laid flat on top of Dean’s body and ran his hands up and down Dean’s sides and upper thighs while Dean kissed him on the neck. He flinched when a wave of pleasure racked through his body after one particular lick on his collarbone.
“Dean,” Castiel panted. “What are you doing?”
He groaned when the rough wetness disappeared from his neck and shivered when a soft laugh from Dean made air blow on the sensitive spot. “I am so glad you’re a virgin.”
Castiel grimaced and moved his head in between Dean’s shoulder and neck, placed his mouth on his collarbone and sucked. Dean moaned and wrapped his arm around Castiel’s neck, pulling him closer.
“I think I learn pretty fast.”
Castiel’s smile widened when he heard Dean’s laughter and he ran his hands up Dean’s arm and back down again. It seemed that as the laughter wore on it stopped sounding like laughter and sounded more similar to sobs. Without getting up and embarrassing Dean any further than he probably did already. He reached back to where Dean’s hands were and held them; he had to move down slightly to achieve such a feat. But Dean’s hands were as warm as his soul and it made Castiel feel full again.
As soon as Castiel threaded his fingers into Dean’s, Dean gripped his in a vice grip-like clutch. And it was in that moment that Castiel realized he pitied Dean too.
He spent the majority of his time focusing on how he was hurting his brothers by leaving. He never once thought of how Dean would feel; they were in love with each other. Dean was his friend and has been for almost twenty years; Castiel was supposed to be his guardian angel. Once again, he would have to leave him to fend for himself. With the Final Battle coming and Dean being the front runner he was going to need Castiel there, he’d planned to be there with Dean. Now he was going to be alone.
Castiel always pitied Dean. Ever since the first moment that he laid eyes on him. But, not so much as that moment.
“Did I black out again?” Castiel asked when Dean was relatively calm.
He felt Dean nodding and tightened his grip on his hands. “Yeah, it wasn’t so long this time.”
“I apologize Dean.”
“Not your fault.”
They sat there in silence for what seemed like hours before Dean spoke. “How does it feel?”
“How does what feel?”
“Being cursed.”
“I don’t feel anything at all, it’s like I’ve become nothing.”
Dean took his hands from Castiel’s and forcible lifted his head from the crock of his neck and kissed him soundly. Castiel moaned and felt a familiar spark in his stomach. He pulled away with a low smack and smiled down at him. “I think the only time I can feel anything is when I’m looking into your eyes.”
Dean looked truly touched but he laughed it off and shook his head. “Dude, I’m not a chick, I’m not so easily swayed.”
“I love you.” Castiel stated simply.
Dean smirked and kissed him on the jaw. “I love you too.”
Castiel ran his finger down Dean’s face, resting it on his lips. “I can’t wait to marry you.”
Dean placed his hand onto the top button of Castiel’s shirt, fingering it steadily. “I know a way I can make you feel a whole lot.”
Castiel smiled. “How much?”
“Everything.”
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