Ice of Oblivion 23
Title: Ice of Oblivion Chapter 23/24
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 23
Castiel came back into himself in the late hours of the morning. It was more of a jolt compared to the easy seg-ways that usually accompanied his coming out of his vegetative states. He thought that it might have be because of the thrills of the previous night; who would have every though that the day Castiel found out he was going to go away would end up being the happiest of his lifetime?
It was so perfect; he didn’t think he blacked out once as long as he was looking into Dean’s eye it seemed like his mind just wouldn’t let him leave. But, then again, it could have also been because of the mind-blowing pleasure he experienced.
He could remember every detail of Dean’s body from the night before: the wetness of his lips as he moved them all over Castiel’s shaft, the strength of his legs when he wrapped them around Castiel’s waist and, of course, the tightness of his opening when Castiel thrust inside of it. He was getting shivers just thinking about it.
Dean was so understanding about all of Castiel’s “early takeoffs” and “misfires”, he guided him through the sexual process like Castiel was a baby bird and he was taking him under his wing. He was so compassionate and caring and… well… mind-blowing. He still felt pride whenever he thought about the pleasure filled expression on Dean’s face when Castiel finally brought him to his peak. He never felt so accomplished.
Dean fell asleep moments after that and Castiel watched him sleep peacefully for the first time since he met him. And that felt good. He must have blacked out somewhere during that process because he woke up in the same leaned over position facing Dean. Except Dean was wide-awake and staring at him.
When he noticed he was awake, he smiled. “Morning”
“Good Morning,” Castiel replied. His eyes scanned the tent and he noticed the sun was very high in the sky based off of the lack of shadows falling over their tents. “What time of day is it?”
Dean, without looking up, shrugged. “Don’t know, don’t care. We already had a slow start today.”
“You shouldn’t have waited because of me. You could have left me here. I would have been fine for a couple of hours -“
“Cas, shut up. Like hell I was going to leave you out here all by yourself. Besides,” Dean leaned over and kissed Castiel on his left nipple enticing a small quiver from his fiancé. He positioned himself to that his chin was resting on his fiancé’s chest. “How would I get married this afternoon without my fiancé?”
Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed and he cocked his head stealthily to the side. “This afternoon?”
Dean nodded with an excited smile on his face. “I sent that asshole Raphael to give the message to my dad. He said everything should be ready by the time we get there.”
Castiel felt the slightest bubble of excitement fill his loins, he was actually getting married today to his dream man, he knew no other dying being in the world ever was or ever will be as happy as him. He leaned up and Dean shuffled off of him, sitting up as well. He barely paid attention to Dean’s grunts and groans about technically not having to get up until that moment but he did have to shiver when he realized that technically meant that Raphael would have had to come into Dean’s tent in order for Dean to send him to Inim’s castles. Which meant Raphael saw them… afterwards…
Castiel focused his attention back on Dean and was about to ask him about his revelations when he noticed he was still naked. He openly gawked at Dean’s lean body and the muscles that bulged out of his skin, not knowing what else to do when perfection was in front of him. Perfection that would be his… his and his alone. Even in death, Dean would still be his. For countless lifetimes or for eternity if that is what they wanted.
His eyes moved from Dean’s body all the way up to his eyes. Dean was looking at him too and had one of his signature smug smirks on his face.
“Like what you see?” Dean asked, scooting closer to him.
Without think too hard, Castiel scooted closer to Dean and wrapped his arm around him, pulling the younger man into a hug. He inhaled Dean’s scent, reveling in the smell of sweat, sex and peppermint then tightened his hold. He felt Dean snake his arms around his body and exhaled slowly.
“… You’re so beautiful…” Castiel breathed out
He felt Dean smile on his shoulder and then say, “You too.”
The angel smiled, he’d been called beautiful many times by thoughtless humans who only saw him as a divine being but it never meant so much.
“Dude, we’re gonna make the best married couple ever when you wake up again,” Dean said with amusement and bitterness in his voice. “We won’t even have to have sex because I’ll be so old - won’t even be able to get it up anymore.”
Castiel was about to comment on Dean’s rather dejected and inappropriate humor when his body decided to cringe at the mention of sex and the deprecatory way that he mentioned it. “I’m very sorry I’m not good at sex.”
Dean laughed and pulled away from the hug smirking, tapping Castiel on the shoulder he shook his head. “No problem; the first five are freebies. The next … hmmm…” Dean tapped his chin and came back with a short ‘Ah’. “Fifteen are learning experiences than every time after that shit has to be fucking perfect.”
Castiel nodded. “Oh!” He was delighted to find that out, he was feeling guilt bad and he was happy that he would eventually be good enough to please his soon-to-be husband.
Dean chuckled and toppled over on top of Castiel.
“Cas, I have to get ready. They’ll be here to pick us up in like a minute.” Dean moped, while he grinded into Castiel’s lap.
“Are we walking?” He asked, slowly.
Dean shook his head. “Nah, I think they’re trucking enough angels here so that we can fly home.”
Castiel grinned and snaked his arm down until he reached Dean’s thigh. “Then we have time to waste, flying takes mere moments. They can wait for us.”
Dean smirked and ran his hand down Castiel’s stomach until he reached the very top of his shaft. Biting his lip, he toyed with Castiel’s pubic hair and skin inspiring a low moan from the angel. “What do you want to do?”
Without hesitation, Castiel said, “I would like to be inside of you again.”
When those words were murmured, Dean’s lips were on Castiel’s and they were rolling around on the bed spread. Castiel felt a deep sadness overtake his soul along with excitement and happiness. This - what he had with Dean - was the ideal life; one that he could see himself having for the next fifty years. The thought only made him cling to Dean tighter and kiss him harder.
If Castiel looked back to the moment he could say for sure that he heard someone getting closer but he could barely pay attention to anything other than Dean’s lips wrapped around him, “lubricating” he called it.
“Dean!” Both eyes snapped back to see Sam, Dean’s brother, gawking at them with wide-eyed revulsion. He turned away after staring for entirely too long and yelled, “Dude, what the hell!”
Dean licked his lips and rolled his eyes. “Have you ever heard of knocking asshole?”
“It’s a tent, you can’t knock on it. Besides, you knew we were coming!”
“Sam,” Dean said sharply. “Just wait a goddamn second, we’ll be ready in a minute.”
After one last scoff, Dam dropped the tent flaps and ran away.
Dean looked at Castiel apologetically and got off of him. “Sorry Man.”
Castiel shook his head. “We always have tonight.”
Dean nodded and passed Castiel his pants and shirt. “Do you need any help?”
“No, I can do it,” Castiel said as he stated putting on his pants and then his shirt. When he was dressed, he stayed on the ground and while he waited for Dean to put his shirt on. When he was finished he took Dean’s hands and they got out of the tent.
As soon as Castiel stepped out of the tent there were many amused or flustered faces staring at them. He didn’t really understand why they were looking the way they were; he and Dean only spent the night bonding as humans couples often did - why was there so much fuss?
Castiel scowled at them and looked at Dean, whose eyes was twitching sporadically.
“What the hell are you looking at?”
Every single ey turned away and Castiel looked at Dean, pleased.
“Want to help me take down my tent?”
“Of course…”
Castiel said after gently patting Dean on the lower back. Dean smiled at him and once again Castiel felt everything.
~*~*~*~
As soon as they made it back to the castle they were met with four very familiar angry scowls. Dean looked like he was about to soil his pants when he saw them; but Castiel stayed strong, he knew that his brothers would be told as soon as the message was sent. He was happy they were there; if he was going to fade away for God knows how long he was happy his brothers were there to send him off.
“Brothers-“ Castiel started, but was quickly cut off by his enraged brother.
“You son of a bitch,” Michael snapped. He stalked toward Dean with his fists clenched and his teeth bared.
Castiel felt rage and a fierce bout of protectiveness fill his gut. No one was allowed to hurt Dean, no one. Even in his weakened state, Castiel could feel his temper spiking and with his temper usually came power. All of his brothers knew that too and they each backed up to show the fact. Though they were still at all levels of pissed.
“Don’t you dare blame this on Dean!” Castiel snapped.
All of his brothers reared back, troubled expressions on their faces and frowns of hurt rather than anger marring their features.
Castiel almost felt bad but they approached Dean in a threatening way. Dean was his lover and soon-to-be husband; they had no right!
There was a long bout of silence where the brothers all stared at each other in challenge. Even though he knew it probably wouldn’t happen, Castiel was willing to fight for Dean’s honor and he wanted to make sure his brothers knew that.
The silence was eventually broken by an awkward chuckle from Dean. All five of the brother’s gazes darted towards him with very irritated scowls. Dean stuffed his hands in his pockets and smiled at Castiel.
“Well, I’ll leave you guys to this… thing you have going. And I’ll go get ready for the ceremony,” Dean said with a small nod. He left the room rather quickly along with any guards or lingering angels.
“Castiel, how could you let this happen?”
Castiel frowned and his eyes dropped to his feet. “It was a mistake - a minor infraction.”
“A minor infraction that’s going to put you to sleep for God knows how long. You know there are still people under the curse from over two hundred years ago.”
“I know…” And the sad thing was, he did know. No matter how much he wanted to listen to Dean’s comments that he would be there with Castiel when he awoke and they would be the best-married couple then, he knew that by the time he did awake Dean would be long dead. He would be alone and Dean would have died with those hopes in his heart.
There was no way this ended well for anyone…
“Your precious Dean will be dead, brother,” Gabriel mocked while the slightest chuckle vibrated through his body.
Castiel could feel a stinging in his eyes, he pursed his lips and inhaled and exhaled harshly and continuously through his nose.
“You understand how foolish what you did was, don’t you?”
Rage filled Castiel for a second time. His brothers were supposed to support him not belittle him and make him feel useless. Did they care at all? He was going to lose the one person in the world who meant more to him than they did and all they could do is curse him and make him feel like the lowest scum of the earth. Bastards!
“What did you expect me to do, huh?” Castiel blasted. All four of his brothers reared back as if they’d been slapped. “Dean was going to be killed, he’s needed right? He’s important to your mission, to our mission, he’s important to me!”
Castiel huffed a chuckle and shook his head. “Or has that changed again? Ten days ago Dean was needed again and now he’s not, is that it? Does that mean that his importance to me has changed too? Does that mean I have to put him to the back of my conscious simply because he’s not important to our mission anymore? Dean was going to be killed; I knew I was going to lose him either way… I want him to live his life… I’ve lived mine. We all have, just because he’s human doesn’t mean his life means less than mine.”
Castiel knew that he was angry and he was expelling so much energy at such a profound rate that if he was at his full power there may have been a mini-earthquake. Expelling energy was bad when he was in his current position and he knew it, but he didn’t say it nor did he care. If he was going out he wanted his brothers to know why.
“Dean means more to me than you will ever know, I would give up everything for him. I will miss him when I’m gone and he will miss me when I’m gone just as he did all of those years ago when you manipulated me away from him Gabriel. But, we’ll persevere and we’ll meet again when father calls me back. Until then, I would appreciate it if you would all shut your mouths about Dean and accept that you four are no longer the only things in my life and you never will be again…”
The last couple flickers of energy berated the side of Castiel’s skull causing a searing pain to run through his torso. Without meaning to, Castiel yelled out, wrapped his arms around himself and dropped to his knees. He felt the pitter-patter of feet running toward him and trying to rouse him but they all fell away from his ears when the deliciously rough voice of his fiancé spoke up desperately.
“Cas?”
Castiel struggled to open his eyes and was delighted that he did when they fell upon his father’s most beautiful creation. He raised his hand slowly to pet the cheek of the boy in front of him; he hated leaving that face but it couldn’t be helped. He was foolish to leave him all of those years ago, if he hadn’t he would have had more time with him. He could have watched him grow into the brave, beautiful man that he became and this would not be so heartbreaking…
“Dean,” Cas said. He found that it was the only thing he could say before the tears that had threatened to escape his eyes fell and his throat was closed.
Dean gripped his shoulders tighter and tried to rouse him again; Castiel could barely hold his head up but he did because this would be the last time he would be given the opportunity to look Dean in the eyes.
“What the hell did you do?” Dean snapped at Castiel’s brothers, all of which were staring at the duo in fright.
“No, Dean - don’t - don’t blame them. This is - it’s my fault,” Castiel slurred.
Dean looked back at him; his eyes were wide, confused and frightful. Castiel continued to stroke Dean’s prickly cheek and sighed - he didn’t understand why he was going to miss those prickly cheeks as much as he did.
“Cas, what’s happening to you?”
“I’m - I’m going away…”
“But - but - you said that it would be a few days.”
“I know - I know I did. I made a mistake, a miscalculation - another one. This is my doing, please don’t be angry.”
Dean shook Castiel weakly by the shoulders. “Come on man, you can’t do this to me right now. Cas, please.”
His sight blurred briefly and then slowly flickered back before disappearing all over again. He could no longer see Dean…
He knew he was there though; he still had more time, more time to be with his friend, his lover, his fiancé, no - his husband. He would use it all until he no longer had a sense left in his whole being, until he could no longer feel a thing.
“I can’t see you anymore, I can’t see anything… talk to me Dean,” Castiel said slowly.
Dean was silent for one moment before, apparently catching on, he started to talk slowly. “Do you remember when we first met?”
Castiel nodded slowly.
“I was covered in dirt and blood; I was a mess, Cas. But, one look at you and I - I knew I was safe. Every time I looked at you I felt safe, I felt like I was with my mom again. Even when I couldn’t see you, even when you were gone I knew -“ Dean’s voice broke off and after a shaky breath he continued. “I knew you wouldn’t let anything happen to me because you were my - you are my guardian angel. Right baby?”
“Don’t call me baby.”
Dean released a sobering breath that sounded like a laugh. “Come on, this is our last go round. One more time?”
Castiel nodded quickly as the smell of peppermint and gunpowder disappeared from his surroundings, replaced by nothingness. “Sure, of course Dean.”
“Do you remember the first time we kissed? I was so nervous but then I was freaking excited because I was in love with you and I really wanted you to love me to… and when you kissed me I knew you loved me. I knew you loved me just as much as I love you if not more -“
“More. So much more Dean…”
“I remember when you saved my life too. I - I - I remember not really being able to see anything until I saw you. And I felt you inside of me when you saved me, there was so much of you and I never felt so loved, not since hugging my mom the night that she died -“ Dean’s voice broke and Castiel could vaguely feel a wet spot forming on his forehead.
“Oh, god! Cas, just stay, can’t you just -“
Dean’s gruff tear-filled voice faded from Castiel’s ear at that point. Four of his five senses were gone, his energy was fading away at a painfully fast rate. There were small traces of it left, enough for him to keep his voice.
“Kiss me - Dean,” Castiel slurred.
Within moments he felt Dean’s dry lips descend onto his own and move around on him; he wished he could see him or hear him but he was fine with feeling him. Dean always felt amazing and he would remember feeling him for the rest of his days. He knew that when he awoke Dean would be long gone and the war… the war would be over.
He hoped Dean had a nice, long life and he hoped he found love sometime in his lifetime. He wanted him to die happy without a thought of Castiel on his mind. Instead, he wanted him content; he didn’t want the man to grieve as Castiel would grieve when he awoke.
He would remember Dean for the rest of his days; he would remember the innocent smile that adorned his face when they first met and he would remember the cocky smirk that lit up his face whenever he said something clever as an adult. He would remember his kisses and his hugs. He would remember his warmth - the same warmth that made Castiel love Dean in the first place. The same warmth that made him leave and the very same that made him come back.
After all this time and all the fighting and pulling away that he did, Castiel was right back where he belonged: in Dean’s arms. He would fade away for the first time there and hopefully he would have the chance to take his rightful place there when his father called him back to heaven.
Dean would of course be there; humans like him went nowhere else.
Stroking the side of Dean’s head, Castiel felt everything fade away until there was nothing left…
Next
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 23
Castiel came back into himself in the late hours of the morning. It was more of a jolt compared to the easy seg-ways that usually accompanied his coming out of his vegetative states. He thought that it might have be because of the thrills of the previous night; who would have every though that the day Castiel found out he was going to go away would end up being the happiest of his lifetime?
It was so perfect; he didn’t think he blacked out once as long as he was looking into Dean’s eye it seemed like his mind just wouldn’t let him leave. But, then again, it could have also been because of the mind-blowing pleasure he experienced.
He could remember every detail of Dean’s body from the night before: the wetness of his lips as he moved them all over Castiel’s shaft, the strength of his legs when he wrapped them around Castiel’s waist and, of course, the tightness of his opening when Castiel thrust inside of it. He was getting shivers just thinking about it.
Dean was so understanding about all of Castiel’s “early takeoffs” and “misfires”, he guided him through the sexual process like Castiel was a baby bird and he was taking him under his wing. He was so compassionate and caring and… well… mind-blowing. He still felt pride whenever he thought about the pleasure filled expression on Dean’s face when Castiel finally brought him to his peak. He never felt so accomplished.
Dean fell asleep moments after that and Castiel watched him sleep peacefully for the first time since he met him. And that felt good. He must have blacked out somewhere during that process because he woke up in the same leaned over position facing Dean. Except Dean was wide-awake and staring at him.
When he noticed he was awake, he smiled. “Morning”
“Good Morning,” Castiel replied. His eyes scanned the tent and he noticed the sun was very high in the sky based off of the lack of shadows falling over their tents. “What time of day is it?”
Dean, without looking up, shrugged. “Don’t know, don’t care. We already had a slow start today.”
“You shouldn’t have waited because of me. You could have left me here. I would have been fine for a couple of hours -“
“Cas, shut up. Like hell I was going to leave you out here all by yourself. Besides,” Dean leaned over and kissed Castiel on his left nipple enticing a small quiver from his fiancé. He positioned himself to that his chin was resting on his fiancé’s chest. “How would I get married this afternoon without my fiancé?”
Castiel’s eyebrows furrowed and he cocked his head stealthily to the side. “This afternoon?”
Dean nodded with an excited smile on his face. “I sent that asshole Raphael to give the message to my dad. He said everything should be ready by the time we get there.”
Castiel felt the slightest bubble of excitement fill his loins, he was actually getting married today to his dream man, he knew no other dying being in the world ever was or ever will be as happy as him. He leaned up and Dean shuffled off of him, sitting up as well. He barely paid attention to Dean’s grunts and groans about technically not having to get up until that moment but he did have to shiver when he realized that technically meant that Raphael would have had to come into Dean’s tent in order for Dean to send him to Inim’s castles. Which meant Raphael saw them… afterwards…
Castiel focused his attention back on Dean and was about to ask him about his revelations when he noticed he was still naked. He openly gawked at Dean’s lean body and the muscles that bulged out of his skin, not knowing what else to do when perfection was in front of him. Perfection that would be his… his and his alone. Even in death, Dean would still be his. For countless lifetimes or for eternity if that is what they wanted.
His eyes moved from Dean’s body all the way up to his eyes. Dean was looking at him too and had one of his signature smug smirks on his face.
“Like what you see?” Dean asked, scooting closer to him.
Without think too hard, Castiel scooted closer to Dean and wrapped his arm around him, pulling the younger man into a hug. He inhaled Dean’s scent, reveling in the smell of sweat, sex and peppermint then tightened his hold. He felt Dean snake his arms around his body and exhaled slowly.
“… You’re so beautiful…” Castiel breathed out
He felt Dean smile on his shoulder and then say, “You too.”
The angel smiled, he’d been called beautiful many times by thoughtless humans who only saw him as a divine being but it never meant so much.
“Dude, we’re gonna make the best married couple ever when you wake up again,” Dean said with amusement and bitterness in his voice. “We won’t even have to have sex because I’ll be so old - won’t even be able to get it up anymore.”
Castiel was about to comment on Dean’s rather dejected and inappropriate humor when his body decided to cringe at the mention of sex and the deprecatory way that he mentioned it. “I’m very sorry I’m not good at sex.”
Dean laughed and pulled away from the hug smirking, tapping Castiel on the shoulder he shook his head. “No problem; the first five are freebies. The next … hmmm…” Dean tapped his chin and came back with a short ‘Ah’. “Fifteen are learning experiences than every time after that shit has to be fucking perfect.”
Castiel nodded. “Oh!” He was delighted to find that out, he was feeling guilt bad and he was happy that he would eventually be good enough to please his soon-to-be husband.
Dean chuckled and toppled over on top of Castiel.
“Cas, I have to get ready. They’ll be here to pick us up in like a minute.” Dean moped, while he grinded into Castiel’s lap.
“Are we walking?” He asked, slowly.
Dean shook his head. “Nah, I think they’re trucking enough angels here so that we can fly home.”
Castiel grinned and snaked his arm down until he reached Dean’s thigh. “Then we have time to waste, flying takes mere moments. They can wait for us.”
Dean smirked and ran his hand down Castiel’s stomach until he reached the very top of his shaft. Biting his lip, he toyed with Castiel’s pubic hair and skin inspiring a low moan from the angel. “What do you want to do?”
Without hesitation, Castiel said, “I would like to be inside of you again.”
When those words were murmured, Dean’s lips were on Castiel’s and they were rolling around on the bed spread. Castiel felt a deep sadness overtake his soul along with excitement and happiness. This - what he had with Dean - was the ideal life; one that he could see himself having for the next fifty years. The thought only made him cling to Dean tighter and kiss him harder.
If Castiel looked back to the moment he could say for sure that he heard someone getting closer but he could barely pay attention to anything other than Dean’s lips wrapped around him, “lubricating” he called it.
“Dean!” Both eyes snapped back to see Sam, Dean’s brother, gawking at them with wide-eyed revulsion. He turned away after staring for entirely too long and yelled, “Dude, what the hell!”
Dean licked his lips and rolled his eyes. “Have you ever heard of knocking asshole?”
“It’s a tent, you can’t knock on it. Besides, you knew we were coming!”
“Sam,” Dean said sharply. “Just wait a goddamn second, we’ll be ready in a minute.”
After one last scoff, Dam dropped the tent flaps and ran away.
Dean looked at Castiel apologetically and got off of him. “Sorry Man.”
Castiel shook his head. “We always have tonight.”
Dean nodded and passed Castiel his pants and shirt. “Do you need any help?”
“No, I can do it,” Castiel said as he stated putting on his pants and then his shirt. When he was dressed, he stayed on the ground and while he waited for Dean to put his shirt on. When he was finished he took Dean’s hands and they got out of the tent.
As soon as Castiel stepped out of the tent there were many amused or flustered faces staring at them. He didn’t really understand why they were looking the way they were; he and Dean only spent the night bonding as humans couples often did - why was there so much fuss?
Castiel scowled at them and looked at Dean, whose eyes was twitching sporadically.
“What the hell are you looking at?”
Every single ey turned away and Castiel looked at Dean, pleased.
“Want to help me take down my tent?”
“Of course…”
Castiel said after gently patting Dean on the lower back. Dean smiled at him and once again Castiel felt everything.
~*~*~*~
As soon as they made it back to the castle they were met with four very familiar angry scowls. Dean looked like he was about to soil his pants when he saw them; but Castiel stayed strong, he knew that his brothers would be told as soon as the message was sent. He was happy they were there; if he was going to fade away for God knows how long he was happy his brothers were there to send him off.
“Brothers-“ Castiel started, but was quickly cut off by his enraged brother.
“You son of a bitch,” Michael snapped. He stalked toward Dean with his fists clenched and his teeth bared.
Castiel felt rage and a fierce bout of protectiveness fill his gut. No one was allowed to hurt Dean, no one. Even in his weakened state, Castiel could feel his temper spiking and with his temper usually came power. All of his brothers knew that too and they each backed up to show the fact. Though they were still at all levels of pissed.
“Don’t you dare blame this on Dean!” Castiel snapped.
All of his brothers reared back, troubled expressions on their faces and frowns of hurt rather than anger marring their features.
Castiel almost felt bad but they approached Dean in a threatening way. Dean was his lover and soon-to-be husband; they had no right!
There was a long bout of silence where the brothers all stared at each other in challenge. Even though he knew it probably wouldn’t happen, Castiel was willing to fight for Dean’s honor and he wanted to make sure his brothers knew that.
The silence was eventually broken by an awkward chuckle from Dean. All five of the brother’s gazes darted towards him with very irritated scowls. Dean stuffed his hands in his pockets and smiled at Castiel.
“Well, I’ll leave you guys to this… thing you have going. And I’ll go get ready for the ceremony,” Dean said with a small nod. He left the room rather quickly along with any guards or lingering angels.
“Castiel, how could you let this happen?”
Castiel frowned and his eyes dropped to his feet. “It was a mistake - a minor infraction.”
“A minor infraction that’s going to put you to sleep for God knows how long. You know there are still people under the curse from over two hundred years ago.”
“I know…” And the sad thing was, he did know. No matter how much he wanted to listen to Dean’s comments that he would be there with Castiel when he awoke and they would be the best-married couple then, he knew that by the time he did awake Dean would be long dead. He would be alone and Dean would have died with those hopes in his heart.
There was no way this ended well for anyone…
“Your precious Dean will be dead, brother,” Gabriel mocked while the slightest chuckle vibrated through his body.
Castiel could feel a stinging in his eyes, he pursed his lips and inhaled and exhaled harshly and continuously through his nose.
“You understand how foolish what you did was, don’t you?”
Rage filled Castiel for a second time. His brothers were supposed to support him not belittle him and make him feel useless. Did they care at all? He was going to lose the one person in the world who meant more to him than they did and all they could do is curse him and make him feel like the lowest scum of the earth. Bastards!
“What did you expect me to do, huh?” Castiel blasted. All four of his brothers reared back as if they’d been slapped. “Dean was going to be killed, he’s needed right? He’s important to your mission, to our mission, he’s important to me!”
Castiel huffed a chuckle and shook his head. “Or has that changed again? Ten days ago Dean was needed again and now he’s not, is that it? Does that mean that his importance to me has changed too? Does that mean I have to put him to the back of my conscious simply because he’s not important to our mission anymore? Dean was going to be killed; I knew I was going to lose him either way… I want him to live his life… I’ve lived mine. We all have, just because he’s human doesn’t mean his life means less than mine.”
Castiel knew that he was angry and he was expelling so much energy at such a profound rate that if he was at his full power there may have been a mini-earthquake. Expelling energy was bad when he was in his current position and he knew it, but he didn’t say it nor did he care. If he was going out he wanted his brothers to know why.
“Dean means more to me than you will ever know, I would give up everything for him. I will miss him when I’m gone and he will miss me when I’m gone just as he did all of those years ago when you manipulated me away from him Gabriel. But, we’ll persevere and we’ll meet again when father calls me back. Until then, I would appreciate it if you would all shut your mouths about Dean and accept that you four are no longer the only things in my life and you never will be again…”
The last couple flickers of energy berated the side of Castiel’s skull causing a searing pain to run through his torso. Without meaning to, Castiel yelled out, wrapped his arms around himself and dropped to his knees. He felt the pitter-patter of feet running toward him and trying to rouse him but they all fell away from his ears when the deliciously rough voice of his fiancé spoke up desperately.
“Cas?”
Castiel struggled to open his eyes and was delighted that he did when they fell upon his father’s most beautiful creation. He raised his hand slowly to pet the cheek of the boy in front of him; he hated leaving that face but it couldn’t be helped. He was foolish to leave him all of those years ago, if he hadn’t he would have had more time with him. He could have watched him grow into the brave, beautiful man that he became and this would not be so heartbreaking…
“Dean,” Cas said. He found that it was the only thing he could say before the tears that had threatened to escape his eyes fell and his throat was closed.
Dean gripped his shoulders tighter and tried to rouse him again; Castiel could barely hold his head up but he did because this would be the last time he would be given the opportunity to look Dean in the eyes.
“What the hell did you do?” Dean snapped at Castiel’s brothers, all of which were staring at the duo in fright.
“No, Dean - don’t - don’t blame them. This is - it’s my fault,” Castiel slurred.
Dean looked back at him; his eyes were wide, confused and frightful. Castiel continued to stroke Dean’s prickly cheek and sighed - he didn’t understand why he was going to miss those prickly cheeks as much as he did.
“Cas, what’s happening to you?”
“I’m - I’m going away…”
“But - but - you said that it would be a few days.”
“I know - I know I did. I made a mistake, a miscalculation - another one. This is my doing, please don’t be angry.”
Dean shook Castiel weakly by the shoulders. “Come on man, you can’t do this to me right now. Cas, please.”
His sight blurred briefly and then slowly flickered back before disappearing all over again. He could no longer see Dean…
He knew he was there though; he still had more time, more time to be with his friend, his lover, his fiancé, no - his husband. He would use it all until he no longer had a sense left in his whole being, until he could no longer feel a thing.
“I can’t see you anymore, I can’t see anything… talk to me Dean,” Castiel said slowly.
Dean was silent for one moment before, apparently catching on, he started to talk slowly. “Do you remember when we first met?”
Castiel nodded slowly.
“I was covered in dirt and blood; I was a mess, Cas. But, one look at you and I - I knew I was safe. Every time I looked at you I felt safe, I felt like I was with my mom again. Even when I couldn’t see you, even when you were gone I knew -“ Dean’s voice broke off and after a shaky breath he continued. “I knew you wouldn’t let anything happen to me because you were my - you are my guardian angel. Right baby?”
“Don’t call me baby.”
Dean released a sobering breath that sounded like a laugh. “Come on, this is our last go round. One more time?”
Castiel nodded quickly as the smell of peppermint and gunpowder disappeared from his surroundings, replaced by nothingness. “Sure, of course Dean.”
“Do you remember the first time we kissed? I was so nervous but then I was freaking excited because I was in love with you and I really wanted you to love me to… and when you kissed me I knew you loved me. I knew you loved me just as much as I love you if not more -“
“More. So much more Dean…”
“I remember when you saved my life too. I - I - I remember not really being able to see anything until I saw you. And I felt you inside of me when you saved me, there was so much of you and I never felt so loved, not since hugging my mom the night that she died -“ Dean’s voice broke and Castiel could vaguely feel a wet spot forming on his forehead.
“Oh, god! Cas, just stay, can’t you just -“
Dean’s gruff tear-filled voice faded from Castiel’s ear at that point. Four of his five senses were gone, his energy was fading away at a painfully fast rate. There were small traces of it left, enough for him to keep his voice.
“Kiss me - Dean,” Castiel slurred.
Within moments he felt Dean’s dry lips descend onto his own and move around on him; he wished he could see him or hear him but he was fine with feeling him. Dean always felt amazing and he would remember feeling him for the rest of his days. He knew that when he awoke Dean would be long gone and the war… the war would be over.
He hoped Dean had a nice, long life and he hoped he found love sometime in his lifetime. He wanted him to die happy without a thought of Castiel on his mind. Instead, he wanted him content; he didn’t want the man to grieve as Castiel would grieve when he awoke.
He would remember Dean for the rest of his days; he would remember the innocent smile that adorned his face when they first met and he would remember the cocky smirk that lit up his face whenever he said something clever as an adult. He would remember his kisses and his hugs. He would remember his warmth - the same warmth that made Castiel love Dean in the first place. The same warmth that made him leave and the very same that made him come back.
After all this time and all the fighting and pulling away that he did, Castiel was right back where he belonged: in Dean’s arms. He would fade away for the first time there and hopefully he would have the chance to take his rightful place there when his father called him back to heaven.
Dean would of course be there; humans like him went nowhere else.
Stroking the side of Dean’s head, Castiel felt everything fade away until there was nothing left…
Next