Easy one to start. Note the rounded joystick ports.

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Dead dead dead. But they'll probably never find a body and therefore they'll trot this on and on for ages. The McCanns (if that is their real names) have started to piss on my shoes. Firstly moaning that the Portuguese police's response to the anonymous letter pointing the finger at some wasteground was to go there and check the place out when ( Read more... )

Dead or alive?

Yep, never finished the travelblogs. I had a good time. Jumped on a plane home, got a headache and farted a lot. Is it a Lee Evans joke where he talks about there always being a wheelchair waiting when you get off a plane and it not being for an elderly or disabled passenger but actually for the guy who opens the door and gets floored by the ( Read more... )

As every day goes by we get closer to the goodbyes and the long long journey home. a short hop up to Auckland. A long skip to LA, where we've heard we'll be treated like criminals. Herded like wildebeest before being scraped of DNA and anally photographed. Probed with pointy alien technology and diced by meat slicers. Finally a jump to good old ( Read more... )

According to the people who know these things the only reasons when a skydive cannot take place is when the sky is mainly cloudy and the wind is over 25 knots at ground level. I therefore opened the blinds hoping for the balmy weather of the previous week and a half to continue. A bitter wind spattered cold, hard rain against the window and low ( Read more... )

The logistics of a family holiday, no matter how short, are mind boggling. Pulling together four kids and their stuff. Picnic lunches made for each garnished with a detail to assuage their idiosyncrasies. Lisa and I cowered while this process was completed. 
To get out of the Hutt Valley we climbed through the hills along a mountain road with ( Read more... )

My brother in law Mick took me for an early morning ride up to a high point overlooking the bay to one side and the flat valley to the other. I forgot my camera. The sun glinted off the tiny specks of waves and the heat of the day slowly dispersed the pre-dawn chill. Back to base and we pulled ourselves together for a trip into Wellington to watch ( Read more... )

On a train into Wellington for Lisa's appointment with a tattoo. I had another foreignness moment whilst changing up some travellers cheques. I spoke to the cashier face to face rather than through an inch of plexiglass, he was open and engaging and apologised for taking a while. Bouyed by the experience we skipped on to Cuba street. 
Lisa got ( Read more... )