Comments | 1973flashfic: Temptation challenge, by awabubbles

awabubbles in 1973flashfic

Temptation challenge, by awabubbles

Jun 12, 2011 19:40

Title: Bluffin' With Mah Muffin
Rating: Blue Cortina
Characters: Gene/Sam, Vince, Clive
Word count: 646
Notes: Speaking of using lyrics for titles...
Summary: Gene wants a smoke during a poker game. Sam makes him want something else.

( “Your move, guv.” )

temptation challenge

Comments 16

basaltgrrl June 13 2011, 01:17:52 UTC

I've never been a smoker, but you sure capture the experience in a tremendously visceral way! I can almost taste the nicotine myself! It's a lovely little game here, and awesome last line!

Also loved "asked for my pack, not your opinion." Hee!

Should be "your move" rather than "you're move", though.

awabubbles June 13 2011, 05:56:30 UTC

I like to think Gene's just as addicted to Sam sometimes, and this time Sam wins out.

And thank you, I've added those edits.

talkingtothesky June 13 2011, 03:23:56 UTC

Oooh, I love this. Same sensuous feel as that look of lust at the end of ep2. Sam's control over Gene here is wonderful. That's one way to make someone give up smoking! Wonderful fulfilment of the challenge, thank you for writing. <3

P.S. You've got a couple of typos besides the one basaltgrrl mentioned: There's only one thing standing [in] his way and censuring Gene him.

awabubbles June 13 2011, 05:52:43 UTC

I'm glad you liked it! And thanks for the corrections, you think you read something over ten times but I still find my brain fills in words that aren't actually there.

(The comment has been removed)

awabubbles June 13 2011, 05:47:53 UTC

thinking about possible methods Gene could have used in a cigarette retrieval operation.
That's an image I'd willingly become addicted to.

I feel terrible for making you want to smoke though!

thesmallhobbit June 13 2011, 07:59:25 UTC

Sam wins this time, but he'd better watch out because Gene will be wanting a rematch and he isn't above using similar tricks himself.

awabubbles June 13 2011, 22:34:56 UTC

Ha! That's very true. I wonder what Gene would take away, Sam's leather jacket, or maybe his tape recorder?

lozenger8 June 13 2011, 10:34:53 UTC

I thoroughly enjoyed the interplay here. Very much an "oh, boys" moment for me. Gene's addiction was freaking palpable. I don't smoke, but I almost wanted to :/

awabubbles June 13 2011, 22:37:40 UTC

Smoking's bad, mmmkay.

Apparently this fic needs a surgeon general's warning.