OH man.
Chorus concert was so hot. Where was the A.C. at??
Especially in those costumes, it was HOT AS BALLS.  SQUARED.

I was sweating like it was my job.

Which it isnt. Because I am a Noods and Co waitress/gringa! 
Which reminds me, work again tomorrow. Work, and the object of my lust.

YES!

I DONT KNOW WHO YOU ARE, BUT THANKS ( Read more... )

While waiting for Ellen at the trainstation, I befriended two station workers in those crazy neon vests.
One spanish man named Emilio with twin sons who work at restaurants and are older than me but less mature (says he), and an Indian man named Habab, who let me use his cellphone to call people.

The let me walk across those ticket turnstiles @ the ( Read more... )

I need freedom again, I need it now, and I'll do whatever it takes.

Let me go she said
Let me go she said
Let me go
Because I want

him

more.

I dont know what to do. Maybe I should try telling the dangerously explicit truth
To a man who will scream at me
and probably cry
when I do.

Last night, I couldnt even get an answer. The way I feel, I want to curl up like a child ( Read more... )

He likes me!
And Emily, but thats means I'm in there too.
Maybe he even LIKES me likes me. My stomach went into my throat when he did that.
Said that.

Maybe there's hope yet.  In any other world, I could have my cake and eat it too.
Maybe there's room for love and lust.
Change and stability, safety, comfort.

Maybe choices can wait, until I even know what ( Read more... )

In any other world ( Read more... )

who the fuck am i writing this journal for

No one knows.

I am DONE WITH THIS BACK AND FORTH DEAL in regards to prom. I say no, because my friends wont be there. Then my friends decide to be there, and then they AND Mrs. Frickin Beste AND my boy yell at me for saying no, so then I say yes, and my boy yells at me cuz decides he's not going, actually ( Read more... )

I dont know what I want anymore, I dont know whats best for me, or what I can and can't acheive.
Every step I take, in retrospect, looks like the wrong one.
But I know what I hope.
I hope that in a perfect world I only love one of them.
Or I love them all, but I can hold it in,
Instead of leaking it out in tears and dangerous, dangerous kisses.

Can ( Read more... )

( Read more... )