our kitten died this morning just like keiko did. she lost control of her body. i feel so horrible because i woke up and felt a big circle of wetness where she had been sleeping so i stripped my bed and took her from hilary's room and put her in her box because i thought she peed on my bed. my mom says that when she left for work the kitten was ( Read more... )

today i went to my cousin (actually its my mom's cousin's son but we are cousins on some level) he turned 30. ive never been really close with him (or any of my other older cousins) but i feel closer to him now. ill explain later because i have other things to write before this happenend. there were 4 or 5 older ladies (including my grandmother and ( Read more... )

ive got my new laptop and im on it right now! i also got a hot new icon of sirius, thank you jen. i want to be cleaning my room but this laptop keeps bringing me back like a zombie...

WHO is chris with right now?
WHAT am i supposed to do with all this anxiety?
WHERE are all the people i would talk to online?
WHY can't my cats continue loving me even though i smell like the kitten?
HOW am i suppose to move on from here??

ok, this all happened so fast. i was cleaning the walls in the bathroom so i can paint them (eventually) and hilary walked in and showed me a picture on her phone of a cute little kitten on dad's dashboard and she asked me if i thought he should bring it home. i said "i dont know, i guess so ( Read more... )

im home alone once again. i saw nancy today and it was one of those sessions where i feel like im backed into my corner and nothing i say will save my argument and i want to cry. but not for the whole time but im definetly not very happy with my life right now. she said she could see it in my face without talking to me. so she told me things i ( Read more... )

i wish chris would get his computer set up again and come talk to me and make me feel happy. i cant stop thinking about him and wanting so badly to meet him. i keep wondering lately if maybe he changed his screen name or hooked back up with his hounding ex girlfriend. he said hes not with her and once said that neither of us needs to be hurt again ( Read more... )

Where is Chris? I wish he would get his computer hooked up and come back and say nice things to me. It builds me up and right now I believe all I've managed to build up is starting to crumble under the weight of all the boredom and uncertainty im having from all this time alone. It's my second week alone with nothing to do. I wake up, watch ER then ( Read more... )

i live to see a picture ( Read more... )

Today i got a letter from myself... i was washing my face in the bathroom and my mom said i had some mail but she didnt know who it was from- there was no return address. when i looked at it i was like "this looks like...i wrote it." but then i remembered it could be from melissa because we have somewhat similar handwriting. so iput it in my purse ( Read more... )