I'm not going to try to be loved anymore.

I just cleaned out my entire gmail mailbox (the mail was dated all the way back to '06). I saved things that made/make me happy, and I deleted things that made/make me sad. I've never considered myself an irrational person but I think that I was at times. Sigh.

alex arkoosh is a flaming pussy.

This is what comes along with all of that good stuff. This is the one thing that makes me unhappy. I hate things that are impossible and unattainable.

All I really want to do is get high and watch Curb Your Enthusiasm. If only certain things weren't so far away.

Also,

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I wish I had a good singing voice.

I've been feeling really depressed all day.

I leave Saturday for Phila/New Jersey. I keep having nightmares that John is going to forget me in Newark.

I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas!

I need to take a break from drinking. This weekend was too much party.

Sometimes I just intenionally ruin things for myself.


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I'm not gonna lie...when I was sitting on the plane this morning and we were descending upon Ft. Myers I almost cried like a little baby. Then I thought about the few things that make me real happy and I stopped myself ( Read more... )