Life continues to be a challenge. My mother, who is moving to NC, thinks I should move there with her. Poor little me doesn't know what to do - I've been crying everyday for the past few weeks, not just once, but off and on all day. THis kind of emotional stress isn't good for my kid, I can feel how my uterus aches because of it ( Read more... )

I've spent more time crying than not these past few days. But through the pain, I've been able to come up with some decisions ( Read more... )

I feel like my heart is breaking. I don't think I can keep my baby. Things with DJ are not going well. I don't have the monetary stability I need to have a child. I don't even have a support group of friends I can count on. I really don't want to give the kid up, but for my baby's sake, I think it's what I'm going to have to do. I feel so sad ( Read more... )

I wanted to post the picture of my baby - I had my first ultrasound done on the fourth. But for some reason, my scanner/printer/faxer thing insists that it's not connected to my computer, even though I know it is. Where's a sexy tech support when you need one? Shouldn't apartments come with a complimentary one stored away in one of the closets ( Read more... )

Damnit. All I want is a turkey and cheese bagel, but there's not a single slice of sandwhich meat in this apartment. Nor is there orange juice or strawberries. Basically, if I want to eat it - it's not in the house. Damnit. I need bananas. I want Cheerios! Why, lord, WHY did I let my mom go grocery shopping?? Oh yeah, that's right - last ( Read more... )

I'm tired of all the skepticism. If my having a baby doesn't really affect a person's life the way it's going to change mine and DJ's, why can't people just smile for me and be happy for me instead of trying to analyze it ( Read more... )

I'm pregnant. I'm going to have a winter baby ( Read more... )

Valentine's Day... the one day your asshole boyfriend is supposed ot treat you right! Oh, wait, I don't think that's the sentiment this day is supposed to hold...

DJ bought me a dozen roses - they're beautiful! Smell delicious, all that stuff. They're sitting on my porch, enjoying the cool sunny day.


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I am so surprised by DJ. I am so completely amazed that he is trying for me. Here I am, ready to just give up and move on... I didn't even notice how he really is trying. I've tried to break up with him just about every night since I've moved into my apartment... but he still stays and fights the fights and tries to work through them. Even when ( Read more... )

He came to see me before work. He asked to spend the night with me tonight. And he offered to do me a favor.

To all this I shout, yes, yes, yes! He has successfully put a smile on my face today.

I suppose all is not as lost as I had suspected. :)