(Untitled)

[_faith_]

So B and Anya are back now thanks to Red, Tara and their witchy skills... not to mention Dawnie and her blood. That kid's been bled so much it's a wonder she has anything left, ya know? Only weird thing is, C didn't come back with 'em. She's still out there somewhere, like Wes and Giles and Harm and Angel. So that's what, three down, four to go

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[ozwolf]

So Faith's finally decided that it's too crowded inside, much like I decided about five minutes after Buffy got back. I'd rather go back, but we still have people missing. Maybe it's just being so close to Willow that's making me edgy. I've been avoiding again. I half wonder if this is a deliberate invitation on Faith's part. Sleeping in the yard and all...particularly being that not that terribly long ago, some morons came into it yelling for her to come out and die. Granted, there's only one of those two left, I killed the one. I pad over, wolf form is so nice sometimes. And stealthy.

[_faith_]

"Hey," I say softly as I see him approach. I think I'm more relaxed than I've been since we got here. I've been here awhile, just watchin' the sky. It's nice.

[ozwolf]

I drop down next to her, and shift back to human. "Hey." I answer. "Going into people overload, or just feel the need to be outside tonight?" I ask.

[_faith_]

"I think maybe a little bit of both," I say. "Plus, B's a major cover hog." I smirk at him, resisting the temptation to reach over and ruffle his hair. He's lookin' way cute over there.

[_faith_]

I'm gonna rub some of the stars off the fabric I'm touchin' if I keep this up. He's makin' it pretty damned clear that he could care less if I'm anywhere around him.

"Yeah," I say.

It's true I've never been outta California, but I'm not so sure leavin's something I'd wanna do by myself.

[ozwolf]

I watch her for a long moment, then, voice sounding just a touch annoyed, I say, "Faith, are you ever going to learn to not take everything people say as a personal attack?" I ask. "Because it's getting tiresome. As Cordelia would say, get over yourself. You've been doing the Slayer thing in Sunnydale and L.A. for a long time now. Maybe you could use a change of scene for a while. That doesn't mean that I'm trying to get rid of you, or I don't want you around, I'm thinking of your wellbeing." I say. It's a lot more than I usually say. But then again, I find myself talking more around her anyways, because she's needed it. I pause a moment. "And don't even try to say that wasn't what you were thinking." The girl's pretty easy to read if you know what you're looking for. Or maybe I've just paid enough attention to be able to read her.

[_faith_]

This is really fuckin' hard. There's a part of me that's tempted to get up and walk away, but... I can't do that. Not with him. There's another part of me that wants to make excuses for why I'm the way I am, but I know that won't wash with him either. My hand stills, and I sigh quietly.

"I'm not real sure I know what I want," I finally say. And that's prob'ly the closest to straightforward I've been in a long time.

[ozwolf]

"Well..." I say slowly, still watching her. "This isn't a test. You can take a bit to figure it out. Maybe seeing some places would help that. Someplace not California." I hint at a smile. "Tibet is beautiful." I lay back, eyeing the stars, mostly to show her that I'm not going anywhere for the time being without having to blatanly say to her, 'I'm staying here and talking to you, and won't suddenly get up and leave'. Which, sometimes, I think she expects out of everyone. "At least, it was when I was there, but I hung out with monks, and somehow I don't think they're quite your speed." I glance at her out of the corner of my eye, that hint of a smile on my face again.

[_faith_]

The tears spill over then, and I don't even know what to say. How can somebody who's had as much shit happen to them as I have, who's done as much shit as I have, hope to ever be clean again.

I look at him, helpless.

[ozwolf]

I wipe at her tears, then pull her down so she can rest her head on my chest, my arm around her. "Things aren't as bad as you think." I say. "Or, they don't have to be."

[_faith_]

I never used to cry this easy. Never used to cry at all. What the hell's wrong with me?

Or, lookin' at it from a different perspective... maybe it's good that I'm feelin' things again.

"I know," I say, my voice choked. "I just... don't know how to do this."

[ozwolf]

"Maybe you're trying too hard." I say. "You put a lot of pressure on yourself." I lightly run my fingers over her lower back with the arm I've got around her. "...from what I see, you do mostly acting, 24-7. That's why I think getting away would help you. There's no one to put on a show for."