invisible hand of self-loathing

[_fauxreal]

dear diary. why do I feel so overwhelmingly worthless? I really would like to get to the bottom of this. it's nothing material or production based because I am capable-r than most. it's just something intangible that only the "lesser" bunch get to contemplate while others stride through life and relationships, not over-achieving or even being

Comments

excerpts from fukuyama's "our posthuman future"

[theeaseofrain]

self-esteem is of course a trendy psychological concept, something americans are constantly being told they need more of. but it refers to a critical aspect of human psychology, the desire all people have for recognition. socrates, in plato's republic, argued that there are three distinct parts of the soul, a desiring part, a rational part, and what he labeled thymos, a greek word usually translated as "spirtedness." thymos is the prideful side of the human personality, the part that demands that other people recognize one's worth or dignity. it is not a desire for some material good or object to satisfy a need - the "utility " that economists usually understand as the source of human motivation - but rather an intersubjective demand that some other human being acknowledge one's status.

the problem with self-esteem as it is understood in american pop psychology is that it becomes an entitlement, something everyone needs to have whether it is deserved or not. this devalues self-esteem and makes the quest for it self-defeating.

Re: excerpts from fukuyama's "our posthuman future"

[_fauxreal]

i wish we could mute that part sometimes. or even be able to locate it, except for it permeates almost everything we do. life is such a depressing spectacle sometimes. now i just feel silly.

[lotusblue]

This made me curious since I came to almost the opposite revelation when I walked home across campus earlier this evening (yesterday). I realized that my self-absorption, and being stuck in reflection and my emotions and schoolwork has made me blind to just how beautiful the world outside is-- I hadn't even noticed how the seasons had changed. That the world is deeply flawed but it is also fucking beautiful sometimes. It made me want to get involved with things I'd been avoiding-- go out and meet people, become involve in activisms and other things that I admire but bow out of actually joining for whatever reason

[_fauxreal]

I've spent a lot of time just being happy for the sunshine but I realize it's just as much of a repressive act to appreciate the "small things" because at least for me, I tend use it to avoid thinking about bigger things and in turn, focus on how wonderful just being is. But everything I've tossed to the side just happened to be waiting for me to trip over on my walk home. It was mostly stemming from the conversation with Disney after class and feeling like a shithead for all the time I've wasted and the altruism of that woman...and resentment for people who seemingly do nothing but live a good little studious life. But yes, your last sentence was very right on and made me feel a lot better. So thank you :)

[styleless]

i hate that feeling. it's so hard to detach yourself from the bad parts.
love from this side.