my horoscope for today said, "may you receive what you had lost." i'm wondering what i'm going to get back. that could apply to so many situations right now.

i am a horrible person and i should probably be on suicide watch right now. nothing matters anymore to me. and i just want everyone to leave me alone. i don't laugh, i don't eat, i don't sleep, and i just don't fucking care.

LIFE IS AWESOME. 

i've been taking so many days off work that i'm afraid i'm going to get fired. i'm normally a very punctual, reliable worker but the past couple of weeks have turned me into a fucking zombie. i was taking birth control and all it made me do was cry randomly at work, at home, and in my car so i stopped taking it. i think it made me depressed enough ( Read more... )

all the loose ends that i try to behind 
have finally started to weave themselves into a fucking noose.

thread trails.

they are coming.

they are everywhere.

1. Do you still talk to the person you FIRST kissed?
-i haven't in a very, very long time. we lost touch after a very intense bbreakup after 5 years of dating. he was an asshole.

2. Have you ever seen your best friend cry?
-yes.

3. What kind of vitamins did you take as a kid?
-flintstone vitamins. i have this theory that vitamins somehow weaken your ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

fuck.

back to being drunk and drugged out.

nothing really makes sense lately.

and i'm upset that i cant hold myself together.

i feel like im never going to be a good person and just grow the fuck up.

back to never never land.

maybe when you can't get another person out of your head 
it's because they are supposed to be there.

me and blakely make friends everywhere we go ( Read more... )

it's always nice to wake up to the sweet smell of degradation.
also: i think i'm getting pacman and pacman ghosts tattoos.

Fill these spaces up with days
in my room you can go you can stay

Now these years locked on my drawer
I'll open to see just to be sure

I can't sleep.
I can't speak to you.
I can't sleep.