i've barely done anything in the past few days save for when my friends run an errand, and then it is only at night we leave the house, lounging and napping like cats all afternoon and emerging into the eighty degree weather after the sun has staged it's grand finale for the day. lately i don't want to show my face to that beaming nuisance anyhow ( Read more... )

riding freight like a champ.  in new mexico going to las vegas la new orleans and then probably taking some college classes after ireland this christmas

walking around in the rain with an old friend last night returned to me whatever senses i once possessed and i am feeling brave in a resigned and shy sort of way, feeling as ready as ever to face the pseudo-reality of life again. i am still not sure of anything, but i don't think i ever was

i'm trying REALLY hard to unconvince myself that everyone is an elitist asshole and/or out to get me. boop boop. my brain broke, so i am still in maine trying not to go to a psych ward, and trying to piece the very shattered fragments of my mind together for a little while. i'm pretty freaked out. radical mental health lovers help! i do not ( Read more... )

my body aches in a way that suggests the complicated spiderweb of sinew and muscle within me has given up. like i've graduated to old age in the course of days. i'm gone again, but i still can't escape my brain ( Read more... )

back to the same old shit. i feel a mixture of cynical amusement and jealousy these days when people express hope for the future. sorry if i made plans with you, sorry if i promised i'd come see you, i lied, but not intentionally. this time flaking out wasn't a decision i even had a chance to make. i have to leave maine i'm tired of living ( Read more... )

my mother and i suppose (i'm not sure) most of her family have disowned me in a sense. more than anything it's interesting to me, because it seems as though they think i've gone crazy, or maybe lost any sort of intelligence i once possessed. if anything i stopped being so goddamn naive and got a fucking clue. i can hear it in the patronizing tone ( Read more... )

i'll be in maine on the 17th. i would have been there like a week ago but some stupid shit happened and i've been in upstate new york for a while. yes.

chicago. epic 5 day ride here from oregon. yes! only 1/3 of the country left to cover. i'm gettin reeeaaaaaaaaaaaalllllll awkward already. it only takes 2 days to get to the east coast from here, but i might be laggin for a while...

see? i did lie. not leaving till saturday cause of rain. and evan just got here so i gotta find his punk ass.