so exactly one person has been here for me and actually gave a damn about how sad i've been lately . sadly enough its no one that i would have expected. so thank you jonathan a . it means so much to me that you took the time to talk to me. no one else has and that speaks volumes about where i belong in life and sure as hell isn't here.

i did something stupid tonight. something jodi will more then likely kill me for. i've been so depressed that last night and today i've been physically ill. i can't shake my headache and this constant feeling that i'm going vomit. that time i was this unhappy was in tenth grade... funny to think that all this was brought on by a silly photobooth ( Read more... )

RIP
Steven Paul (Elliott) Smith. August 6, 1969 - October 21, 2003

i wish for once that i could feel completely comfortable with my life. that i didn't feel the need to strive for more. just to be completely comfortable. take the live one day at a time sort of attitude toward life. its just not in me. i'm forever day dreaming about past situations future situations and situations that will never happen in my life ( Read more... )

to put ones life in perspective. only three months ago my good friend told me she wouldn't be back at vcu because her mom was sick. her mom had brain cancer. for awhile there it looked like she was doing better. but it was a phase. her mom died last night. in a matter of three months one of the strongest people i know has lost her mother. now she ( Read more... )

the lines of friendships have blurred. its disheartening to think that those i considered friends merely look at me as an aquantance. it has me questioning all my friendships now. there's no way i can just come out and ask do you consider me a friend. maybe i'll just revert back to seeing everyone as aquantances. i finally thank god hooked up with ( Read more... )

rest in peace the man in black. =(

my life was drama filled for the past 24 hours. i hate you drama . die. i however will take a lot of the blame because i was over emotional and dramatic.. must smooth things out other wise there will be all sorts of hell to pay. but i'm no longer filled with the need to spew all sorts of hateful words. thanks in large part to a new friend i made. ( Read more... )

i really fucking hate being pre empted for a boy. but oh well guess we didn't have plans that were important enough.

jodi i re did your wallet. its different but i think in a good way. today was filled with music. glorious music. tonight is to be filled with paint, music and coffee. i found a coffee that seems to still keep me up . its aptly called foglifter ( Read more... )