Has anyone dealt with late ptsd?  I am a SA survivor from nearly 15 years ago.  The "anniversary" is coming up this week.  The 2nd, 5th, 10th never fazed me.  I usually didn't realize until after and thought how thankful I was that I didn't remember on the date.  For some reason this year it's haunting me.  A song, a smell, a phrase reminds me.  I ( Read more... )

Things have been kind of good.  Especially compared to how it was.  I can't believe I was so depressed.  I'm not happy with my life, but I'm the happiest I've ever been.  

My ego is like my stomach. It keeps shitting what I feed it.

For a minute there, I lost myself.

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around

My boyfriend (pretty much fiance at this point, been together for almost 6 years) was transferred to Seattle earlier this year.  I've been saving money and paying off bills and planning to move.  Something is keeping me here (legally) and I'm so itchy to leave I don't know what to do sometimes.  I feel like a little kid living at my parents' house ( Read more... )