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all i know is it's a pity life; keep me simple again
Grad school is more than this, clearly, but-
I have been catcalled/hollered at more in the last two weeks than ever, aggregately, in my life. In my mind, I am both allowed and not allowed to complain about it. I am not allowed because I have been exempt from exposure to it, back in what I knew at the time were a consecutive set of rural Candylands. ( Read more... ) -
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I want to yell loving things again. I want to level and accept the sincerity of others. Always, I am selfish in my timing. -
hold yr chin up
Things with Nick are offish over, Rambo died, I hate my job, and I'm leaving friends in North Carolina and William and Mary to move in somewhere else far away all over again and I have not, yet, lost my shit. The more proud I feel, fine. -
honest
It's been like a year since I've really dated anyone, and all I miss is being able to say lazy, cuddly, sincere things. This last year has been transitional, confused, but most of all, dishonest and unthinking. I am probably not cut for hooking up, nonmonogamy, parties, theses, etc. and I am probably made for boring. But we're all made for free and ( Read more... ) -
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Two burly bearded men in old, loose shirts just tied the Class of 2010 banner onto the wood railings of the Wren balcony. It took both of them to attach the gold weaving and that awkward, heavy pole to Ancient Cherry with clear plastic zip ties. No one noticed, because no one notices you. But we are graduating!
Colleges are messed up sometimes. -
we should only write things when it rains and we're sorry
I only get emotional around you, when the growing up comes out. I'm tripping all over myself like children do, to make you smile irately and then I get to forgive myself in some awful, tangled, adult way ( Read more... ) -
glass and feathers are shit to live for
All the men and women in my life are having just a fucking awful time. Everyone feels inadequate and gray: Nick can't get his words right, my Dad feels blamed, and Kimberly can't get the water out of the basement. Your livejournal entries are definitely following that theme, and I know it feels good to say it and read it later, and then later still ( Read more... ) -
EXASPERATED
WHY DO ALL THE BOYS I LIKE AS PEOPLE DO DUMB THINGS -
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I am officially done with fall semester. What a joke grad students are ( Read more... ) -
I AM SO SCARED.
I AM/AM NOT this person anymore: Overthinking every text like a Rorschach blot, giving shape to find wrong reasons, waning interest, and disrespect. I wasn't this way before, and before that. I could giggle and tell you everything 'bout his dick. It didn't mean anything. I can't say to him or anybody else that I don't give a shit this round. But I' ( Read more... )