What do I feel like? What am I going to write?

I want to be numb...why? IDK. I just do. I'm gonna keep drinking... although I know I can't drink forever.

On the way home from work I thought about L.J and how I havent written in it forever...I should go to bed, even though I don't want to. But I will since no one is awake.

Night

Sometimes I wish I could write entries here like I used to...

But then, I actually let myself feel and then think about how I feel. Now I'm either too busy or feeling too "good" and wanna forget it and block it out. But I'm still the same person.... I am.

You left when my sister said nothing to you. You made what she said to me about you... yet while you were here and she was saying it... you said nothing ( Read more... )

Grad school? Who will want me? I only have a 3.0... and nothing "notably" special. But I know i got something... I just need the $/scholarship for it... I also know I want to write more in this thing, yet it hurts too much still... why is that? I don't have anything bad to write. I think I'll go make War a lunch for work tomorrow, he'll know how ( Read more... )

I've got so much energy! I really, really, really don't want to go to class at 7. But I know I have to. I just don't know how I'm gonna sit through the entire 2 hr class tonight.

I wanna go out a lot this weekend/week. Friday night me and War have the concert... then I work 9-5 Sat. They're having a going away party for a pharmacist from work Sat. ( Read more... )

LOL! I just re-peirced my labret while I had the balls... how bawling is that? lol I wanted it back.... so I saw where it used to be... and well, bam. lol Ill spare you... but Im back!!!

What is enough? What will satisfy and tame me? What will fullfill me? Is this normal... because I'm young? When am I gonna be comfortable? When will the anxiety leave? Things are good, yet I'm holding my breath. I don't wanna sleep. I don't want to calm down... and I don't want to buckle down, yet I want to do well in school... is there a middle ( Read more... )

        I was kinda bummed today, and I was gonna come on here and vent... but I've got a better idea, I'm gonna write about my past two weekends and how they've been good. Because what I got is a good family and a wonderful boyfriend.
        Last weekend I came home for the weekend. Friday I think I went to see Warren at his house to hang out. ( ( Read more... )

So here's the deal, next semester I'm trying to dorm with my sister. The only down fall is I'm gonna have to live in freshman dorms because she is going to be an acedemic advisor... leave it to her to be the smart one. She gets room and board for free! Lucky bitch. Oh well at least Ill be able to stand my room mate this semester... I hope it all ( Read more... )

I came online to right thi specifically... I have the best boyfriend in the entire world. Alot of people say that, but I mean it. He cheered me up today. Wanna know what my day was like? I had a hang over yet had to go to work this morning, and work until 5:30... he met me for lunch, then I found out I got a parking ticket while at work... and to ( Read more... )