for the last hour ive been reading all of my old entries and it's just all real crazy and kind of overwhelming i think ( Read more... )

so the other night i was at target right? because i got this gift card to target, you know? and i knew and nothing could change my mind that i wanted these red patent leather slutty pumps and i knew nothing could change my mind right ( Read more... )

im having a slumber party tonight at my parents house ( Read more... )

she said:

"can you feel it? it's comming.

and im so sick of running.

for once i wanted to give it away,

and im not surprised you wouldnt stay."

he said:

"but change is inevitable, darling.

it's scarry and im sorry.

but i have got to go now,

because your heart is beating too loud."

its becoming a little scary because ( Read more... )

lemme just vent for a quick sec on how i hate being "parented"

and now im getting double teamed because apparently my sister thinks i came out of her vagina 19 years ago [19 years in 4 days]

seriously... like the last two weeks she's done nothing but bitch at me constantly and being super parental like and i HATE being told what to do. probably more ( Read more... )

Dear Reader,

let me catch you up...

ive been under the infulence of a lot of things.

but you probably have no idea what i mean.

what if its just too late?
what do i do when there's no more
promises that i can break?
ill take my consequence.
how do i get control?
how do i wait for the whole wide world
to stop spinning around?
thats how i concentrate.
well im not my father,
and youre not my energy.
why even bother,
when you can just make believe?
im a fire starter.
i burn when i get angry ( Read more... )

1. im overdue.

on countless things.
i have a list even.
and i keep telling myself
"ill start tomarrow"
and i never do.
i just write about it instead.

2. it's comming back.

winter depression.
where all i want is not you.
and to be a whole lot of someone else.
because i really hate tanning.
"have you been?"
"duh."

3.  This guilt feels so fimiliar and i'm home.

im ( Read more... )

you love winter,

you secretly do,

better your chances,

for death to choose you.

your tire catches ice,

swerve to the right,

whirlwind headlights,

disappear into the night.