I'm sick of getting my hopes, and then being let down ( Read more... )

I've been spending alot of time with my dad.

its weird, but i'm loving it secretly.

I was almost luckier last time, because i didn't see it coming.

this time i see it all too clearly.

soon, my soul will be dead,

hopefully my heart stops beating with it.

I'm watching my life fall apart in front of my face.
I'm losing things i have no control over, and some I do.
I should give up, It's over.
but deep down, my heart won't quit.
I have this little ounce of hope you left in me.
I'm using it now more than ever.

It'll never be as bad as it was,
but it may get close,

I just wont go with it.

it's hopeless; i think. ;/

I have to be the dumbest girl alive; i really like i am right now.

i wish i would think things through before i did them.

Hold your breath; lock your heart; make your eyes cold ( Read more... )

Same days its hard.
some days i dont want this anymore.
I have a choice, I made the one i wanted.

didnt i?

It only gets hard when i miss you.
i pretend you dont matter, i pretend i dont miss you.
I am lying, i think. I  only miss you when i get lonely,
when i feel i am failing. its not right.

Then theres days you disguist me.
really you do, the thought of ( Read more... )

i have everything together.
im not getting kicked out of school.
i will graduate,
im not kicked off NHS. :)
I can pass a drug test.
My lungs are clear.
I'm back to my old self!
Karma sucks (haha boy) 
I got accepted to IUPUI.
leaving in august!
i have a job.
i finally had the heart to say goodbye.
i still love you.
ally is all i'll never need.
I am happy.
thats ( Read more... )

 white houses.