You're not man enough to take me, Smith. We all know that.

( Private to Sylvie Fawcett )

How did it get so hot overnight? I don't mind being cold cos then at least you can add more layers, but there's only so much you can take off, you know? This is blimmin' ridiculous.

But if the suitor got to see the princess when she didn't get to see him, then how can love be blind? Unless it's blind and one-sided ( Read more... )

Blokes have it easy.

We wear suits to formal occasions so we all look alike anyway.

So there's no point in me ranting about how someone was dressed like me.

I thought not doing door work on a Saturday night would mean I avoided all the morons.

I was wrong.

Bouncing at a club has plenty of downsides.

One being that when the front door decides to lock me out at five in the morning, there is no one up to let me in.

I hope this patch of carpet is more comfortable than it looks.

And cleaner.

I'll be naffed off when I'm not so tired.

Tomorrow I have to wear a suit.

I hate wearing suits.

( Jimmy Peakes )