Your "guilt over not feeling guilty" feelings are very common - check out imnotsorry and I'mNotSorry.net. Abortion is something that has a lot of societal stereotypes and stigmas attached to it, despite the fact that almost half of the female population has had at least one by the time they are 45, and abortion crosses every race, class, ethnicity, and religion.
As for the weight gain...you're just not 15 anymore! Maybe that's a poor excuse, I dunno, but I'm 21 and I certainly weigh more than I did at 15. It sucks but it's life, unless you fight it (and I don't have time to right now!).
i totally know about the guilty for not feeling guilty feeling. it lasted for a time with me and every once in a blue moon it'll creep up again, along with other little fears and things. i usually just remember that some people/groups/etc. in society want me to feel guilty for "killing a living child" (i was only about 8 weeks) even though it wasn't a viable being yet. also those same people/types tend to think that we (women) shouldn't have the authority, etc. over our own bodies. i do my best to work through those feelings when they occur, but i always remember that i did what i had to do for me at the time. maybe that's selfish, but as my counselor at the time said, it was very much a mommy decision. i knew i couldn't provide for a child and in some ways was unwilling. just let those feelings go if you can....hope that helped some.
What are the long term affects? Unless there was some complication, there aren't any long-term effects from abortion. You just had pregnancy tissue removed from your uterus; that tissue would have come out when you gave birth anyway. :)
Will I be unable to have children when and if the day comes that I want children? No way. I had an abortion; four years later when we decided to have a child, my husband and I got pregnant on the first try.
I worry that since I didn't go to the check up appt, I'll have some horrible disorder when i'm older. The follow-up is mostly just to be sure that you didn't have any tissue left inside your uterus. Leftover pregnancy tissue (placenta etc) can cause infection. If that was 4 years ago, there's no danger that infection has occured - you'd have been in trouble long ago, and that didn't happen. So don't worry about it :)
Can anyone relate to that? I know he doesn't hate me, I just hope he won't hate me in 10 years.I think more likely he'll be happier about it in 10 years, when he's moved
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Unless there was some complication, there aren't any long-term effects from abortion. You just had pregnancy tissue removed from your uterus; that tissue would have come out when you gave birth anyway. :)
Will I be unable to have children when and if the day comes that I want children?
No way. I had an abortion; four years later when we decided to have a child, my husband and I got pregnant on the first try.
I worry that since I didn't go to the check up appt, I'll have some horrible disorder when i'm older.
The follow-up is mostly just to be sure that you didn't have any tissue left inside your uterus. Leftover pregnancy tissue (placenta etc) can cause infection. If that was 4 years ago, there's no danger that infection has occured - you'd have been in trouble long ago, and that didn't happen. So don't worry about it :)
Can anyone relate to that? I know he doesn't hate me, I just hope he won't hate me in 10 years.I think more likely he'll be happier about it in 10 years, when he's moved ( ... )
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