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[keyinthelock]

It's four months today since my D&E procedure.  Despite the fact that I've been fairly consistently bombarded with nasty comments from anti-abortion bigots (on another forum), I'm still convinced I made the right decision.  It's not so much a story of my abortion as it is a story about what it's like to terminate a wanted pregnancy after a prenatal

Comments

[causticwookie]

A family friend of ours faced a similar situation a few years ago, but chose to keep the baby. They lost the baby seven months into the pregnancy, and she suffered painful internal complications to the extent that she can no longer have children on her own.

I think you made the right decision, not just for you and your husband but for the baby and for any children you may have in the future. I'm sorry that there are people who have been rude--it's obvious that they just don't understand what a terrible situation you were in.

[keyinthelock]

When people find out late in pregnancy that the baby isn't going to live, I've learned that a lot of them opt for induced L&D. In fact, I'm involved in a project to make little knitted blankets for the medical staff to wrap the baby in after it's born, so that the parents have something to take home from the hospital.
The one thing that's astonished me after my experience is how very many people think that their opinion matters on this topic. It's between myself, my husband, my doctor, and whatever higher power is out there, if any. It's none of their goddamned business how I choose to end a doomed pregnancy. Carrying to term can be horrifically dangerous, if a nearly-full-term fetus dies or if there's further complications. And as I'm sure everyone knows, childbirth is a lot harder on a woman's body than an abortion.

[silentbanshee]

I am bookmarking your entry if you don't mind. I think something you said was extremely important, this concept that a potential life has much more value than the life of the mother who is a viable and currently productive member of society. How quickly do they turn away from these women by tagging them as monsters and sluts and murderers.

And people don't seem to realize how rare the late-term abortions are. That most of the time the decision to abort a pregnancy so late is a difficult decision made only to keep the suffering minimal for all, including the unborn baby.

It's easy to place a blanket judgement . . . it's harder to place oneself in the shoes of the pregnant woman and her decisions. She has my compassion, no matter the reason for the abortion, she is here now and now is what we have.

[silentbanshee]

By the way you have my thoughts I hope with all I can send that you will be able to have the child you want. From what I read here, you will make a wonderful mother.

[keyinthelock]

Feel free to bookmark. I made the entry public because I think people should see that later-term abortions aren't a case of being irresponsible. In many, if not most cases, they're a case of being merciful.

[keyinthelock]

Okay, and then I realized that I didn't make the entry public, which I just rectified. Feel free to link to it.
This is a "sockpuppet" livejournal - that is, it exists solely so that I can post about topics like this openly and not get tracked down and targeted by the crazies. Because let me tell you, there are people who will stop at NOTHING to punish me for making this decision. People I've never met, people I will never meet, all who think their opinion should have an impact on my choices. I'll never understand it.

[madcowsexiness]

It is completely bizarre to me that people attack you for aborting a non-viable fetus. I understand the other side's arguments for why they don't agree with other types of abortions, even though I don't agree with them, but absolutely no part of me can find any justification for believeing that this type of abortion is wrong. NONE.
It makes me angry enough when people criticize women for getting abortions at all, but this makes me especially angry. Even when your pain and suffering is taken out of the picture, what about the suffering of the CHILD? Christ.
Sorry, I just get very angry when people think that pain is noble and that life is somehow still a gift when it's spent only in tortured agony.

I'm sorry that this happened to you though, and I really sincerely hope that you have better luck concieving. *hugs*

[soda_raison]

I went to a Christian high school. Abortion they said, is murder. Euthanasia is treason upon God. Excuses of protecting oneself is the Devils selfishness for one should always have faith and leave their choices in God's hands for all life was meant to be. Yadeeya, God has a plan for us all.

It's crap but, that's the 'reasoning'.

At first those kinds of arguments (idiotic ones that is) depressed me, then, I was angered. I moved on to a stage of complete and utter apathy.

[coyote_angel]

I'm so sorry this happened to you. People can be so disgusting...you made the best decision for all involved in the situation, and yet people would rather you have put your own life at risk to give birth to a baby that would only have known suffering, if it had even survived the birth. It's so sad that you're getting hit so hard with such criticism. *hugs*