I had a second meeting with my history of photography professor. It went fairly well. I wasn;t there as long as I was for the first meeting. But it was still a good conversation. We mainly talked about the photos. And she was surprised with how well my still lifes turned out. She said she was a bit worried because she knew i wasn't really fond of ( Read more... )

I'm so overwhelmed with all the decisions i have to make soon! I don't even know what to do! I tried focusing on just one part...but it connects to every other part. I just don't know what to do ( Read more... )

Today's session actually went really really well! I was able to give her everything i wanted her to know at thursdays session. And i finally feel like i'm taking a step forward with no steps back.

Fingers crossed that thursdays session goes just as well!

( Read more... )

I can feel myself starting to shut down. I know part of it is just because i've been so tired lately. But i'm scared that i'm shutting down in therapy too. I don't want to, but my mind and insticts have finally realized that december is right around the corner and once it hits i'm going to have to deal with the emotional pain of losing yet again ( Read more... )

it's only 11:13pm right now and i'm exhausted. But i can;t let myself go to bed. I tried so hard to sleep last night and all that happened was tossing and turning and bad memories. I think I had 3 panic attacks last night, but i can;t really remember. And the 1 or 2 of sleep i managed were useless. They were filled with horrible nightmares. i woke ( Read more... )

It's almost Halloween...and i just want to press the fastforward button.I hate this holiday. It just needs to go away...i don't want to deal with it ( Read more... )

Wow...so I have a lot to catch everyone up on. so here's a list. lol ( Read more... )

So I had therapy twice this past week. It went really really well. I think out of all the therapists I've had she's going to end up being the best-which is bittersweet since I might be graduating in December. Go figure I find the one who matches up with me last. That's just my fucking luck i guess.

Anyways. The first appointment is always the uber ( Read more... )

tomorrow is my first day back in therapy after 3 months without it. I'm really nervous to start up with yet again a new therapist. I'm getting really tired of having to start over again. i just want to give them the past 4 yrs in a book or something so i don't have to constantly do everything i don't want to do anymore.

I'm just tired. I'm tired of ( Read more... )