mixed into this mass of confusion that nothing realates to. [why you ask?] my reason's don't agree with a visible explanation ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

julia raptis sent me a myspace message [most unexpected]

she talked to me... she talked to me sincerely and [most unexpected] ---she understood more than i thought---

SHE IS THE ONE WHO SENT THAT LONG COMMENT ON MY LIVEJOURNAL A LONG TIME AGO THAT I DIDN"T KNOW WHO IT WAS!

[i take back anything i have said about her] for that matter i take back ( Read more... )

someone told me that he loved me.

those words------exact----in that order.

-i

-love

-you.

pause.

new day.

-i -

am

-in

-love

-with

-you.

[my physical response... no answer---no reply---just a deep breathe and a cliche statement on the lines of "i have to go cause i have to help my grandmother"]

[my mental response... undecided.]

[my ( Read more... )

the marks on my neck has faded.
the cuts on my arms have healed.
the bruises on my neck, arms, and legs have dissapeared.

i am more or less decent.

Breaking my back just to know your name ( Read more... )

take a full pill bottle and sit it in front of my face ( Read more... )

today is my birthday.

where to go now.
the next step seems so far i fear i might trip in midst step.
i miss tyler so much... more than he thinks.
and i regret so much, but living in regret is not the solution.
my back hurts, and color in my face is coming back.
my teenage experiance has been littered with unnessesary events.

correction... the phone number is 409 886 4752.